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Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The simple truth is-children DO need fathers-and his color is irrelevant!




So sorry ladies, We've had 2 deaths and one very catastrophic illness going on in the family, and I've know I've neglected my blog horribly. I apologize, I've been grieving and very distracted. But I've missed everyone something fierce though-and I hope all is well with all of you......
Moving on....
I think the importance of fathers is without precedent. I think it's so very important for children to have fathers in their lives. I truly believe the black race is in the horrible state that it's in right now because of the horrendous LACK of fathers. It's definitely time for most bw to move on.
I remember when Pres. Obama tried to address this in a poignant speech to thousands of ppl. Bp immediately became miffed and accused him of pandering to his 'white side'. They protested, stomped, and made such a fuss, he let the issue lapse, but his face looked tortured and concerned at the 'stupidity' of bp. Now I know I'll offend some with that statement, but lets call a spade a spade, Anyone who cannot see that innocent children need fathers (even if they seem ok with just a mother) is either disillusioned, or out of touch. Let's face it . You may be the best mother in the world, but you're children will secretly long for and NEED a father!!!
Look at this quote from:Source: Wade Horn and Andrew Bush, "Fathers, Marriage, and Welfare Reform,"Hudson Institute Executive Briefing, 1997,
CHILDREN NEED FATHERS, STUDY SHOWS Most states have focused almost exclusively on welfare-to-work strategies in response to 1996 federal welfare reforms. But this doesn't address the greatest danger to the well-being of children in the United States, says a Hudson Institute study: the fact that nearly four out of every 10 children are being raised without their fathers.The states should restructure their programs to promote fatherhood and marriage, say researchers Wade Horn and Andrew Bush. Building strong families would improve the life chances of children and help rebuild low-income communities.*Among long-term prison inmates, 70 percent grew up without fathers, as did 60 percent of rapists and 75 percent of adolescents charged with murder.* Fatherless children are three times more likely to fail school, require psychiatric treatment and commit suicide as adolescents.*They are also up to 40 times more likely to experience child abuse compared with children growing up in two-parent families....

This is an excerpt from Pres. Obama in his speech to fathers that caused such an uproar....

Father’s Day not just as a father grateful to be present in my daughters’ lives but also as a son who grew up without a father in my own life. My father left my family when I was 2 years old, and I knew him mainly from the letters he wrote and the stories my family told. And while I was lucky to have two wonderful grandparents who poured everything they had into helping my mother raise my sister and me, I still felt the weight of his absence throughout my childhood. As an adult, working as a community organizer and later as a legislator, I would often walk through the streets of Chicago’s South Side and see boys marked by that same absence—boys without supervision or direction or anyone to help them as they struggled to grow into men. I identified with their frustration and disengagement—with their sense of having been let down. In many ways, I came to understand the importance of fatherhood through its absence—both in my life and in the lives of others. I came to understand that the hole a man leaves when he abandons his responsibility to his children is one that no government can fill. We can do everything possible to provide good jobs and good schools and safe streets for our kids, but it will never be enough to fully make up the difference. That is why we need fathers to step up, to realize that their job does not end at conception; that what makes you a man is not the ability to have a child but the courage to raise one.
As fathers, we need to be involved in our children’s lives not just when it’s convenient or easy, and not just when they’re doing well—but when it’s difficult and thankless, and they’re struggling. That is when they need us most. And it’s not enough to just be physically present. Too often, especially during tough economic times like these, we are emotionally absent: distracted, consumed by what’s happening in our own lives, worried about keeping our jobs and paying our bills, unsure if we’ll be able to give our kids the same opportunities we had. Our children can tell. They know when we’re not fully there. And that disengagement sends a clear message—whether we mean it or not—about where among our priorities they fall. So we need to step out of our own heads and tune in. We need to turn off the television and start talking with our kids, and listening to them, and understanding what’s going on in their lives. We need to set limits and expectations. We need to replace that video game with a book and make sure that homework gets done. We need to say to our daughters, Don’t ever let images on TV tell you what you are worth, because I expect you to dream without limit and reach for your goals. We need to tell our sons, Those songs on the radio may glorify violence, but in our house, we find glory in achievement, self-respect, and hard work. We need to realize that we are our children’s first and best teachers. When we are selfish or inconsiderate, when we mistreat our wives or girlfriends, when we cut corners or fail to control our tempers, our children learn from that—and it’s no surprise when we see those behaviors in our schools or on our streets. But it also works the other way around. When we work hard, treat others with respect, spend within our means, and contribute to our communities, those are the lessons our children learn. And that is what so many fathers are doing every day—coaching soccer and Little League, going to those school assemblies and parent-teacher conferences, scrimping and saving and working that extra shift so their kids can go to college. They are fulfilling their most fundamental duty as fathers: to show their children, by example, the kind of people they want them to become. I came to understand that the hole a man leaves when he abandons his responsibility to his children is one that no government can fill. We can do everything possible to provide good jobs and good schools and safe streets for our kids, but it will never be enough to fully make up the difference. That is why we need fathers to step up, to realize that their job does not end at conception; that what makes you a man is not the ability to have a child but the courage to raise one.
As fathers, we need to be involved in our children’s lives not just when it’s convenient or easy, and not just when they’re doing well—but when it’s difficult and thankless, and they’re struggling. That is when they need us most. And it’s not enough to just be physically present. Too often, especially during tough economic times like these, we are emotionally absent: distracted, consumed by what’s happening in our own lives, worried about keeping our jobs and paying our bills, unsure if we’ll be able to give our kids the same opportunities we had. Our children can tell. They know when we’re not fully there. And that disengagement sends a clear message—whether we mean it or not—about where among our priorities they fall. So we need to step out of our own heads and tune in. We need to turn off the television and start talking with our kids, and listening to them, and understanding what’s going on in their lives. We need to set limits and expectations. We need to replace that video game with a book and make sure that homework gets done. We need to say to our daughters, Don’t ever let images on TV tell you what you are worth, because I expect you to dream without limit and reach for your goals. We need to tell our sons, Those songs on the radio may glorify violence, but in our house, we find glory in achievement, self-respect, and hard work. We need to realize that we are our children’s first and best teachers. When we are selfish or inconsiderate, when we mistreat our wives or girlfriends, when we cut corners or fail to control our tempers, our children learn from that—and it’s no surprise when we see those behaviors in our schools or on our streets. But it also works the other way around. When we work hard, treat others with respect, spend within our means, and contribute to our communities, those are the lessons our children learn. And that is what so many fathers are doing every day.....

I think he says it all. The importance of fathers is unmitigated. It's so sad to me to see so many women convincing themselves that their children do not need one. I pray that my sisters wake up because in the bc over 80% of black babies are being born OUTSIDE of wedlock! And many if not most of these babies will NOT have a father in their lives, and yet we have the audacity to wonder why our children are running wild, and reeking havoc...
Ladies please wake up. If bm will not step up, and I think we can all see that they won't. (probably because most of them are still little boys themselves) give other men the chance-for God's sake! stop waiting for bm to act like men (It will prob-never happen) move on and find men WILL be fathers to your children, who WILL love them and WILL care for them. You deserve a better man, and your babies certainly deserve-and Need- REAL fathers.....

43 comments:

Zabeth said...

Missed you Sara and your telling it like it is!

Anonymous said...

Oh I'm so sorry for your loss: both of my parents and only sister are gone from cancer.Welcome back!! I'm been saying this all along--I don't care if the woman is the President, she is NOT A MAN!!--guys are basically guys, and IF men of all 'stripe' mentor these boys, we'll be waay ahead!! If they don't, I see possibly barbarianism or polygamy in the future especially in the B/C;

Miss Glamtastic said...

Sorry for your loss. Glad to see you back :)
If people don't understand that an actively involved father is necessary to a healthy childhood, then they are seriously missing some good common sense. Good fathers are critical to a child's development-point blank. The fact that so many BW have convinced themselves that fathers are not needed shows how blinded they are and how far they will go to make others think that wanting what everyone else wants is 'wrong', 'selfish' or even 'bourgie.'
These are the same folks that will be the first to scream that a child has 'no home training'-from a home that is missing a critical member. Uhm, maybe the 'home training' is lacking because some of the trainers are MIA! These OOW hypemen (and hypewomen) need to sit it down and shut it up.

Anonymous said...

Welcome Home, Sara!

You and your family have my sympathy.


Yes, you are correct Asian men are stepping up, good for them. Why should they be without a special someone.

Again, welcome back.

a.

trish said...

Sarah we missed you. I am so sorry about your loss. God bless your entire family.

socialitedreams said...

preach! no wedding no womb indeed, vet well and get a good father for the future children. Not sure why we seem stuck on stupid about that when the proof is blatantly laid out before us. black folks love dysfunction, apparently.

Vonnie
http://www.socialitedreams.com/

Bellydancer said...

My condolences Sara and I am glad you are back. The No Wedding No Womb campaign kicked up some dust recently and I couldn't believe the bs I was reading from bw especially when it concerned marriage and their kids.
Even non black folks waded in quoting nonsense and such. Bw truly are alone and need to recognize the con games being played at their expense.

Alexis said...

Sara thank you so much for speaking out on this issue. I'm sorry for your loss and am glad you are back. I've been missing your messages.

This very issue has been a burden on my heart for my two fatherless children. I own up to my choices and have even tried to make amends with their father but I can't do it all by myself in terms of building a relationship with him and getting him to see how important being a present and available father is to his children.

He's all words, but when it comes to actions he fails miserably with one excuse or another. This has been a 16-year on and off process.

So I'm done and moving on (better late than never). I want my kids to know the protection and love of a man who wants to be their father. It will take much prayer and wisdom but it's not impossible.

So keep speaking the truth and snatching the blinders off. I needed this especially today.

All the best to you and your family.

Anonymous said...

so sorry for your loss sara but im lad you still took the time to ive us ur wonderful words of wisdom...

obama's speech made me tear up! i have NO idea why anybody would be mad at that speech! really waht it is is that its the cold hard TRUTH!..and it hurts..only the truth will ruffle feathers...i also wanna say that you cant just blame the black community for not thinking that men are not needed in the family, this is all form the feminist agenda t all thhat caused all this! with all this sexual liberation and moral relativism...this is the result! owmen who cant get men to marry them because they just give it up too easily and then afterwards they wann get serious and want the guy to settle down! u cant have it both ways i think! women in general have been losing out tremendously because of these "new morals" and of course the ones who suffer are the chldren...like another post said up top, women we are NOT men!!! were just not!

sorry if i offend, i say this out of love and concern not to be "hatin"....people wake up and think for urselves!!!

Quiskaeya said...

My condolences on your loss. Hoping you will be enveloped with peace during this rough time.

This post is on point. ::Giving standing ovation:: I can't thank you enough to speak on this issue because it amazes me how so many black mothers don't get it. The lack of fathers in the black community is killing our children. Just as you reported the statistics are grim and will only continue to worsen (as if that is possible) if black people don't wise up.

Again thank you for this fantastic read.

Multilingual Kids Have More Flexible & Divergent Thinking

Almond Eyes said...

I'm sorry for your loss Sara! My condolances to you and your family and my prayers are with you for the illness going on in your family.
Asian men are stepping it up! My bf of almost 3 years is mixed race south asian (with black, spanish, portugese and chinese) and I have seen many other south asian men with black women. I know these images are hard to find but if you could put up pictures of BW/IM that would be awesome.

Thanks for coming back to share your thoughts with us. I've missed your columns.

IrishCool said...

Sara,
My condolences on your loss; thank you for posting my comment last month. By the way the ladies who that have left comments are no beautiful and attractive, but very intelligent and insightful in their ideas. Once again I'm a fan of the blog- "keep on keepin' on". Peace

Anonymous said...

I am VERY SORRY to read about your loss. I usually don't post many comments, but I highly enjoy reading your thoughts and perspective. I agree with you, STRONGLY. I am happy to learn that you will still be posting on this blog. I look forward to sharing in your thoughts and offering support.

May God bless you and your loved ones during this difficult time.

Queen said...

Welcome back Sara!

Queen said...

Sara, what you said is right on bw (the ones who are guilty) need to wake up and make better choices and stop mistaking "swagger" for manhood in these bm. Quit looking for a prince in thugs clothing; he does not exist. My brother said it like this,"black women who keep picking bums have no right to complain when the dude abandons them and their kids. I am not saying they deseve to be abondoned, but 9 times out of 10 you knew he was a bum when you slept with him so why are you suprized at the outcome?" I have to agree. To add to that bw cannot claim the title IMHO of a "strong black woman" when they create problems through a seies of bad choices that makes their life hard unecessarily when they deserve better. That title should be reseved for the woman though circumstances beyond her control stands resillient. I know some bw have made mistakes when they were young and are trying to correct the error so no condemnation there, but we need to stop letting no good BM use us and our bodies selfishly ;the babies need two parents. There are some who argue, "well Obama turned out alright" that is becasue his Maternal grandmother and grandFATHER assisted his mother in raising him helping him have opportunities he would not have had if they were not involved in his life. Even with that suppot system around him, it is apparent that he still missed his father's presence in his life.

Juniper said...

I'm sorry about your loss Sara.
I like this post it's very true. I'd rather that my children be raised by a step-father than no father at all if I had any children.

I'm thoroughly irritated with men who blame Single mothers while these very men judging the women are responsible for fatherless children.
The particular men always act like these women got pregnant by themselves.

Anonymous said...

Low level men can come in sheep's clothing. As Evia says, "Vet all men", do not take any chances.

a.

Valerie's World, Hair, Beauty and other matters said...

I'm very happy that you are back, very sorry about your loss, as usual. You always speak the truth.

Lorraine said...

Dear Sara, sister. I am so sorry for your losses and the hurt that accompanies it. It can be very trying but rest assured, you have a loyal following.

Thanks so much for this wonderful insight. You are in essence saying what "No Wedding No Womb" is trying to convey to the masses in the bc. There has been some backlash, but the overwhelming majority agree with the message and exactly what you say here. It is undeniable but folks will still come up with the most outlandish nonsense and foolishness to cast doubt, fears and hate because of their own mistakes. Then some just hate because the message is positive so thank you again for speaking out! Right on time as usual.

Take care and kiss that baby for us. We did miss you much girl.

Oshun said...

Hugs Sara!

I am so sorry to hear about the losses. I send my condolences to you and your family.

Also I am so sorry to hear about the illness.

You have a lot going on (plus a young baby). I hope that you can take some time to be good to yourself dear.

I am thinking of you.

Felicia said...

Sara,

I'm so sorry for your loss. We are all happy you've returned. Outstanding essay as usual.

Take care and God bless.

RockNRollSista said...

I do believe children need fathers. I was lucky to have my grandfather in my life when I was younger. I wanted my dad to be in my life but, he decided that it was best to start a new family. My mom did a very good job all of these years. She left my dad when she was pregnant with me. To this day they are still married and its what 27 years later. I want my children to have a good dad or father figure in their life.

Shan said...

Sorry for your losses. Take care and be strong.

Johnnie said...

The problem with what I read is that you almost seem to imply that that single black mothers need to go out and look for white men to be non-biological fathers to their already existing children. Would not a better primise be to simply not have children out of wedlock and if you have trouble finding a black husband, look for a non-black husband?

It has been been shown that with all things equal, a white non-custodial father is less likely to be involved with his children than a black non-custodial father. So having a child by a white man out of wedlock does not generally ensure a greater degree of involvement. The difference is that a far smaller percentage of white children lack custodial fathers.

The out of wedlock birth rate for black children is actually less than that for Hispanic children and not significantly higher for than white children. The percentage is what is so much higher and that results greatly from the low birth rates for married blacks.

So what it comes down to is that black women need to stop having children when unmarried and start having more children when married. Chances are overwhelming that married black men will be greatly present in their children's lives even after divorce.

Anonymous said...

Johnnie, shut up.

GoldenAh said...

Welcome back, Sara. Sorry to hear about your losses. Of course blogging is the least important element in all of your affairs, but your voice has been missed.

ToughCookies said...

God bless you Sarah right on point. I really want sistahs to wake up and stop feeding into trash.

ToughCookie said...

@Johnnie please shut up and go preach that old bullcrap somewhere else. Its not about black men anymore and dont try to make it be. The truth lies right here in our face its hard not to see whats going on. I am so sick of black man trying to cover up that fact they have a overwhelming complex problem and then tries to degarde us to make themselves feel better. Its a fact that black men is the only race of men that do not put their women first its right here in our face. Black men need to stop trying to Fu*K ANYTING with a pulse, how dare u come here with this weak as argument. Its not our fault that blackmen leave their children , its not our fault blackmen stay in jail, its not our fault they are to weak to stand up for their women, its our fault that they leave one women for another women and then they both are pregnant the list goes on and on. Stay tune!

I Rock said...

I'm so sorry for your loss Sara. Please take care of yourself, and my sympathies go out to you and your family.

Bria said...

Kind of make sense what Johnnie said. Typically, a man of any race who marries you will be a father to the kids he makes with you. The blog post seems to be saying to make sure that the man who impregnates you will be a good good father, regardless of whether he is married to you or not. If we promote having children only in marriage, the point becomes sort of moot since all research indicates that married fathers are overwhelmingly actively supporting and spending time with their children with their wives.

If we are to celebrate good non-custodial fathers, then we must rethink the constant references to 70 percent of black women being single or 70% of black children being born out of wedlock because the latter does include active non-custodial fathers. But that should not be good enough. The goal should be marriage.

Taylor-Sara said...

Johnnie your point is well taken, but for me. BM are really not worth mentioning in the context of fatherhood. We all know NO OTHER MEN are as likely to leave and desert innocent, helpless children as bm. In stead of being here trying to lecture me about my post, why are you not out there showing me how wrong I am. I really feel sorry for 90% of the women hitching their wagons to bm, because they are going to be depressed, derespected, and deserted....

Anonymous said...

@ Sara:
Today, I was speaking to a female friend of mines who was saying the say old bw need to do this and bw need to do that. Hmmm, what about the bm? She says most bm were not taught this and that and of course there is the historical part.
I did tell her women were not meant to hold up an entire community or race by themselves. She agreed. OK, all bm are not bad, noted.
It is also noted when they are educated and financially secure too many bm all of a sudden desire other race females. As my friend was saying, "Well, bw wasn't taught this or that". We were going around and around.
It appeared to me that she was placing the majority of the blame on bw and she is a bw with three daughters and she is a former police officer. Good for her she is getting engaged to her high school love after two failed marriages. Also, my friend wants to start some type of family counseling program, heal the blk. family type of program. Hmmm, it is kind of hard to heal a man who is not present. My friend means well and her fiance is going to a theological seminary or something similar. My friend is one of those people almost every word that comes out of her mouth is in reference to God, whatever happened to "You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain...
Yes, I believe in God but, I do not simply believe in just waiting. One must become more pro-active in her own life.
If you sit and wait you maybe waiting for a very very long time, get up and get moving.

a.

Anonymous said...

LOL, the rock sure follows your blog. WOW, you just returned to blogging.

a.

Shan said...

I am not surprised by Jonnie's post. As usual, he being a bm I assume, is putting the blame on black women; that black women should wait to be married to have children as if men have no responsibility. When are the masses of bw going to wake up? This "blame bw mentality" that many bm have is pretty much here to stay and is not going away, at least not with the present generations.

Many bm are transparent these days. Any bw that can't see through them must not have an IQ higher than room temperature because they have been repeating the same behavior and its getting worse.

Johnnie said...

I didn't mean to come off as lecturing Sarah, just making an observation. Not sure what you mean by "showing you how wrong you are", but I can reference some things I have read and I look foward to reading your opinions on them.

http://center.americanvalues.org/?p=21

"When marriage fails or fails to form, when mothers and fathers do not commit to one another, nurturing fatherhood typically dwindles away. Over time, unmarried and divorced fathers tend to disengage from their children � both emotionally and financially. This is true for fathers of all races and classes. Although one study suggests that unmarried Black fathers are more likely to spend time with their children than are unwed white and Hispanic fathers, the evidence is quite strong that over time single fathers of all races tend to separate from their children and families, and that marriage significantly increases the likelihood that a child will grow up being nurtured by his or her father."[22]

http://cup.columbia.edu/book/978-0-231-14352-3/the-myth-of-the-missing-black-father/excerpt

Allen (1981), looking at wives’ reports, found black wives reported a higher level of father involvement in childrearing than did white wives. McAdoo (1988) and Bowman (1993) also concluded that black fathers are more involved than white fathers in childrearing. However, Roopnarine and Ahmeduzzaman (1993), and Hossain and Roopnarine (1994) find no or insignificant racial differences in the level and quality of married fathers’ involvement. Across races, fathers in married-couple families were about equally involved with their children, which in all cases was less than mothers.

Bright and Williams (1996) conducted a small qualitative study of seven low- to middle-income black fathers in two-parent families in an urban area. They found these fathers worked collaboratively with their wives to nurture their children and that chief among their concerns were rearing children with high self-esteem, protecting their family members in unsafe environments, securing quality education, and having a close relationship with their children. Marsiglio (1991) also found black fathers to talk more and have positive engagement with their older children.


---------------------------------

So it seems to me that there is a risk in having children out of wedlock no matter the race of the father and to reduce this risk, all women should have children only in wedlock no matter the race of the husband. If you can't find a husband of one race, find one in another. Just make sure you have a husband when that child is conceived.

Taylor-Sara said...

A, it's not only hard to heal a relationship with someone who is not present, it's impossible! BW are either going to have to wake up or perish! It's really as simple as that. PPl like your friend really raise my ire. Of course the downfall of either or both parties, but why should bw shoulder the blame, and responsibility for every damn thing? I get so tired of hearing bw should do this,and then bm would love them, Bw should do that, and then bm would come back.... ad nauseum. I DON'T WANT BM TO COME BACK TO BW! THE AVE. BW IS SO MUCH BETTER WITHOUT THEM! Let them be the ww problem, and let bw move on, once and for all. And it is just such a ridiculous notion that bw can hold up a relat. all by herself. Bw have got to stop listening to ppl who would tell her to stay stuck on stupid, and look around with her own eyes....It's pretty obvious bm only seem to "want" bw when they're down and out, or "need" her for some reason. Did you know that over 90% of BM millionaires are married, or dating outside the race! What does that say loud and clear?...

Anonymous said...

To Sara,

I agree with you and I have tried to tell some AA women. Some AA women understood. While others are just grasping at straws. And, others are trying their best to hold unto that life jacket or that idea of what could be. LOL, I am the only one in my office who is not afraid to say there is nothing wrong with interracial dating/marriage for AA women.
Although, I was surprised to find out that there was at least one AA woman on campus who dates irr. One never knows who is dating whom and there is one bm campus police officer who stated that he can understand why AA women are dating out, he has at least two daughters.
a.

Nicole Little said...

This is the truth. Every child needs TWO MARRIED PARENTS!!! Why don't black people get it? That's why I'm through with black people. We are too stuck on stupid. We are the only race that are doing things that's against nature and celebrating it like it's a holiday (i.e "Baby Mama" by Fantasia).

Nicole Little said...

I forgot to tell you that I have a blog called "Self Love For Black Women". Enjoy!

Faith said...

Hugs Sara and thanks for the recent post. Along with the common sense post comes the usual DBR nonsense to oppose it. SO typical. And boring.

Let these concern troll black males who want to offer stats and opinions spend their time to talking to other BLACK MALES and not come to an IRR marriage site for black women.

We already KNOW why they do it. To waste time and attempt to deflect the real responsibility.

This crazy notion that BW should have husbands and fathers for their children is so far from the norm of the way most AA black people think we may as well be talking about building a rocket ship to them.

Either way they see the light bulbs clicking on and the escape hatch activated and they don't like it.

Just ignore them and keep moving to your higher standard, high quality life. For those women who find their "King" brava. For the majority of BW they will need to go elsewhere, settle or be alone. Those are the only options. IF they want marriage, children and a solid family life that is.

BrittanyanJ said...

To Johnnie (and whoever else is *kinda* missing the point:


Here is the problem, illustrated below.


Scene A. You have an attractive, single black woman being pursued by a swaggering, horny black man. She says, "Since sex makes babies, and I want my babies to be born into wedlock, I want to make sure that all chances of my having a baby (whether or not she uses bc) occur within wedlock. Let's pursue marriage first."

Scene B. Horny, swaggering black man screams bloody murder and runs away.


This is the crux of why this is even a matter for discussion.

Johnnie said...

To BrittanyanJ

The problem with your premise is that statistically, there is no significant difference in the percent of single white and black women who are sexually active (around a 6% difference), whereas there is a near 400% difference in the rate of births between single black and white women.

http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/psrh/full/4002708.pdf

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr56/nvsr56_06.pdf

Also, the recent study of the amount of time couples spend in bed not sleeping concluded that married black couples are more than twice as likely to report having sex daily than married white couples, yet married blacks have a lower birth rate than married white couples.

http://www.blackamericaweb.com/?q=articles/life_style/fitness_life_style/16953

Miriam said...

Hi Sara!

I was double checking all my links and thought I'd stop by. My condolences to you and your family!

A father figure is really truly important, I can see that in the way my son copies -literally the clothing- that his father wears, etc. Also father have this consuming, all over, all encompassing, engrossing love style that women just don't have. lol. Kids need that (wives too lol)

~~~~~~~
off topic: if you know that lady in the pic on the post -the one with the family near the mickey mouse, that is a friend of mine that I don't know how to contact. So, if you have contact w/her I hope she will see this comment. (contact me!!!)