Total Pageviews

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The simple truth is-children DO need fathers-and his color is irrelevant!




So sorry ladies, We've had 2 deaths and one very catastrophic illness going on in the family, and I've know I've neglected my blog horribly. I apologize, I've been grieving and very distracted. But I've missed everyone something fierce though-and I hope all is well with all of you......
Moving on....
I think the importance of fathers is without precedent. I think it's so very important for children to have fathers in their lives. I truly believe the black race is in the horrible state that it's in right now because of the horrendous LACK of fathers. It's definitely time for most bw to move on.
I remember when Pres. Obama tried to address this in a poignant speech to thousands of ppl. Bp immediately became miffed and accused him of pandering to his 'white side'. They protested, stomped, and made such a fuss, he let the issue lapse, but his face looked tortured and concerned at the 'stupidity' of bp. Now I know I'll offend some with that statement, but lets call a spade a spade, Anyone who cannot see that innocent children need fathers (even if they seem ok with just a mother) is either disillusioned, or out of touch. Let's face it . You may be the best mother in the world, but you're children will secretly long for and NEED a father!!!
Look at this quote from:Source: Wade Horn and Andrew Bush, "Fathers, Marriage, and Welfare Reform,"Hudson Institute Executive Briefing, 1997,
CHILDREN NEED FATHERS, STUDY SHOWS Most states have focused almost exclusively on welfare-to-work strategies in response to 1996 federal welfare reforms. But this doesn't address the greatest danger to the well-being of children in the United States, says a Hudson Institute study: the fact that nearly four out of every 10 children are being raised without their fathers.The states should restructure their programs to promote fatherhood and marriage, say researchers Wade Horn and Andrew Bush. Building strong families would improve the life chances of children and help rebuild low-income communities.*Among long-term prison inmates, 70 percent grew up without fathers, as did 60 percent of rapists and 75 percent of adolescents charged with murder.* Fatherless children are three times more likely to fail school, require psychiatric treatment and commit suicide as adolescents.*They are also up to 40 times more likely to experience child abuse compared with children growing up in two-parent families....

This is an excerpt from Pres. Obama in his speech to fathers that caused such an uproar....

Father’s Day not just as a father grateful to be present in my daughters’ lives but also as a son who grew up without a father in my own life. My father left my family when I was 2 years old, and I knew him mainly from the letters he wrote and the stories my family told. And while I was lucky to have two wonderful grandparents who poured everything they had into helping my mother raise my sister and me, I still felt the weight of his absence throughout my childhood. As an adult, working as a community organizer and later as a legislator, I would often walk through the streets of Chicago’s South Side and see boys marked by that same absence—boys without supervision or direction or anyone to help them as they struggled to grow into men. I identified with their frustration and disengagement—with their sense of having been let down. In many ways, I came to understand the importance of fatherhood through its absence—both in my life and in the lives of others. I came to understand that the hole a man leaves when he abandons his responsibility to his children is one that no government can fill. We can do everything possible to provide good jobs and good schools and safe streets for our kids, but it will never be enough to fully make up the difference. That is why we need fathers to step up, to realize that their job does not end at conception; that what makes you a man is not the ability to have a child but the courage to raise one.
As fathers, we need to be involved in our children’s lives not just when it’s convenient or easy, and not just when they’re doing well—but when it’s difficult and thankless, and they’re struggling. That is when they need us most. And it’s not enough to just be physically present. Too often, especially during tough economic times like these, we are emotionally absent: distracted, consumed by what’s happening in our own lives, worried about keeping our jobs and paying our bills, unsure if we’ll be able to give our kids the same opportunities we had. Our children can tell. They know when we’re not fully there. And that disengagement sends a clear message—whether we mean it or not—about where among our priorities they fall. So we need to step out of our own heads and tune in. We need to turn off the television and start talking with our kids, and listening to them, and understanding what’s going on in their lives. We need to set limits and expectations. We need to replace that video game with a book and make sure that homework gets done. We need to say to our daughters, Don’t ever let images on TV tell you what you are worth, because I expect you to dream without limit and reach for your goals. We need to tell our sons, Those songs on the radio may glorify violence, but in our house, we find glory in achievement, self-respect, and hard work. We need to realize that we are our children’s first and best teachers. When we are selfish or inconsiderate, when we mistreat our wives or girlfriends, when we cut corners or fail to control our tempers, our children learn from that—and it’s no surprise when we see those behaviors in our schools or on our streets. But it also works the other way around. When we work hard, treat others with respect, spend within our means, and contribute to our communities, those are the lessons our children learn. And that is what so many fathers are doing every day—coaching soccer and Little League, going to those school assemblies and parent-teacher conferences, scrimping and saving and working that extra shift so their kids can go to college. They are fulfilling their most fundamental duty as fathers: to show their children, by example, the kind of people they want them to become. I came to understand that the hole a man leaves when he abandons his responsibility to his children is one that no government can fill. We can do everything possible to provide good jobs and good schools and safe streets for our kids, but it will never be enough to fully make up the difference. That is why we need fathers to step up, to realize that their job does not end at conception; that what makes you a man is not the ability to have a child but the courage to raise one.
As fathers, we need to be involved in our children’s lives not just when it’s convenient or easy, and not just when they’re doing well—but when it’s difficult and thankless, and they’re struggling. That is when they need us most. And it’s not enough to just be physically present. Too often, especially during tough economic times like these, we are emotionally absent: distracted, consumed by what’s happening in our own lives, worried about keeping our jobs and paying our bills, unsure if we’ll be able to give our kids the same opportunities we had. Our children can tell. They know when we’re not fully there. And that disengagement sends a clear message—whether we mean it or not—about where among our priorities they fall. So we need to step out of our own heads and tune in. We need to turn off the television and start talking with our kids, and listening to them, and understanding what’s going on in their lives. We need to set limits and expectations. We need to replace that video game with a book and make sure that homework gets done. We need to say to our daughters, Don’t ever let images on TV tell you what you are worth, because I expect you to dream without limit and reach for your goals. We need to tell our sons, Those songs on the radio may glorify violence, but in our house, we find glory in achievement, self-respect, and hard work. We need to realize that we are our children’s first and best teachers. When we are selfish or inconsiderate, when we mistreat our wives or girlfriends, when we cut corners or fail to control our tempers, our children learn from that—and it’s no surprise when we see those behaviors in our schools or on our streets. But it also works the other way around. When we work hard, treat others with respect, spend within our means, and contribute to our communities, those are the lessons our children learn. And that is what so many fathers are doing every day.....

I think he says it all. The importance of fathers is unmitigated. It's so sad to me to see so many women convincing themselves that their children do not need one. I pray that my sisters wake up because in the bc over 80% of black babies are being born OUTSIDE of wedlock! And many if not most of these babies will NOT have a father in their lives, and yet we have the audacity to wonder why our children are running wild, and reeking havoc...
Ladies please wake up. If bm will not step up, and I think we can all see that they won't. (probably because most of them are still little boys themselves) give other men the chance-for God's sake! stop waiting for bm to act like men (It will prob-never happen) move on and find men WILL be fathers to your children, who WILL love them and WILL care for them. You deserve a better man, and your babies certainly deserve-and Need- REAL fathers.....