This is going to be a bit controversial (but when am I not- huh?)
For those of you who do not know, I have a very handsome half- Spanish brother named Pedro, whom I love dearly. He is the child of my mom's second marriage. Pedro has Spanish features, long braided hair (halfway down his back). He's very fair complected, Latino looking, and fluent in his native language. In fact, people always think he's lying when he's says he's half black.
Anyway, something happened to my brother a few months ago that made me think. In early January, he had a job interview that his best friend Tito got for him. Everyone knows the economy is horrible and everyone is losing jobs, houses etc. Well out of the blue my brother decides he's needs a better job, as he wants to marry his girl friend. (He's way too young, but that's another story) Anyway, everyone in the family was telling him to go apply later on when the economy picks up, and that he won't have a chance right now. He didn't listen-he never does. He's always been the type of person who does exactly what he wants. Anyway, he went for an interview for a very high position within a local corporation. ( A position which would normally be considered out of the question for someone so young and inexperienced. -Keep in mind my brother is not old enough to legally buy a drink! Anyway, a few hours later he drops by our house and swoops me up happily! He told me that when he went to interview, he was originally scheduled to meet with a older bw, named Ms Williams. But as he was asking the receptionist directions to the lady's office, two very friendly Hispanic women began to converse with him in Spanish. They asked him if he was there for an interview, when he answered yes, they not only escorted him to the appropriate office, but gave him inside tips about the job. Then they told him to stay there, they would see if Ms Sanchez could take the interview. A moment later the women he was supposed to interview with motioned for him to come into the office. As he entered, a large Latino woman rushed in behind him, introduced herself as Ms Sanchez, and basically took over the interview (much to Ms William's obvious irritation). When Ms Williams tried to ask him about prior experience (of which he had none in this area) Ms Sanchez cut her off and redirected the questions. My brother said she was so warm and loving to him, that he thought that was her normal personality. He didn't find out until later that her kindness seemed to be reserved for Hispanics only. Anyway the long and short of it was that Ms Williams tried to deny him the position based on his youth and lack of qualifications, and Ms Sanchez overruled her. He got the job. His salary doubled and he loves it there. The people love him, and treat him like family. Even though he had no idea what he was doing, the ppl went out of their way for him and worked with him until he got the job down pat.
The thing is my brother is very young. I don't think he realizes that he got that job unfairly. Many far more qualified ppl were turned down because this Latino woman was determined to only hire her own kind! . I wondered what would have happened if one of us had gone in there with him, or his gf had been with him! (she's black). I was happy for him, but I felt a bit bitter because I thought about all the bp they probably turned down to insure a *Latino* person got that job! I also felt a bit angry because bp still don't seem to get it but everyone does. You can move mountains with a focused group, instead of spinning your wheels trying for a lifetime trying to do it yourself. My late, military father used to put it like this: Don't ever put your buddy's gas mask on-before your own! Spanish ppl seem very focused on bettering life for Spanish ppl. Same with Asian, Indian, etc. But Who focuses on bettering the lives of bp? Because it's certainly not us!- We always seem too busy trying to undertake someone else's cause!
Now that may sound racist, but I honestly don't mean it to. What I mean is that our *cause* has become so diluted, we don't even recognize it anymore. We have taken up so many banners that the message has become lost. My brother's experience is quite common. I remember dropping him off at a new HS, and watching Spanish kids come out of the woodwork to greet him and offer him help. I'm talking about when he was a complete stranger to them! They are quite cohesive as a people. They really seem to go out of their way for each other. My brother never worried about forgetting his lunch money in school or which clubs to join or anything else. He knew the Spanish kids would take him under their wing, and they always did. Maybe I'm jealous because I don't see this type of community, and mutual benefit in the black community. It fact it seems like many of us go out of our way to stand on each other's backs to get where we want to go in life. In fact we'll often go out of our way to buy from other ppl, to the exclusion of black ppl! We seem to have an inherent distrust of ourselves and I think others sense it and exploit it. For instance, why are all the black hair stores are owned by Koreans? How come ppl can come over here from another country and set up businesses in black communities? ( and do extremely well) Yet we could almost NEVER go into their communities and start a business with any viable hope of success! Why are so many bp are struggling to make ends meet, in a land overflowing with opportunity? I know someone whose husband is a cab driver. She says the man he works for came over here less than 5 years ago (from Pakistan) without a penny to his name. But he stayed with his family and they ALL worked, and saved a year and gave him the seed capital to start his cab service. Now a few short years later he makes upwards of 300.000 per year. He employs bm to drive his cabs and pump gas ( he now owns a gas station+ and several cabs) and employs Pakistan ppl to keep books, work the office, and do the day to day operations. My point is: how come bp don't work together to do things like this, so they can own the cabs instead of pumping the gas? How come we are the only race trying to do it all alone, or in conjunction with ppl who do not have our best interests in their sights? When you go into these places in the inner city, you will see that although they service the bc, they never HIRE from the bc. They always pick their own. They always put their own agenda first. Somehow we as a ppl have never learned to do this. I am not saying we should not care about others, I am saying we should take care of our own problems first. If your neighbors children are hungry, and your are as well-who gets to eat first? Any fool knows you feed your own children first, and then try to help the other children! But you must take care of your own home first- and take care of your own ppl first-everyone seems to inherently know this-except us.....
Botton line the reason I think we MUST focus on our own agenda to the exclusion of everyone else's is because no one else will! Everyone feels no shame in doing the best they can for their own community and not sharing that spotlight with anyone else. Everyone that is, except us. We are still trying to include everyone else, and diluting our message in the long term. We seem to embrace some false sense of guilt for even thinking of ourselves at all! While many others never give us a second thought! We need to stop playing the fools, and realize that we are just as important as anyone else, and that we must help ourselves before we can help anyone else....