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Thursday, October 9, 2008

WW! - If you don't want black children-please don't sleep with black men!!!





Please, Please, Please, if you know you harbor racist tendencies or feelings-please do not bring innocent children into it!!



I wrote this post in response to several young women who have written to me begging for help. All of these young ladies are the product of ww/bm relationships/marriages. I am only enclosing one story as the others do not want to discuss their plights publicly. Please read the following story and give this wonderful young woman your insight and compassion... and please tell your ww friends to please think about the children that she might bring into this world before she lays down with bm because it seems to be in fashion.....

Hi Sara,

I really love your blog. I'm writing to you to tell you of my experience with a neo hip fake wannabe down -white woman. She is also my mother. Twenty five years ago, she decided to try the black experience and she seduced some young 17 year old black kid into bed with her (she was 25) She wound up pregnant and my nightmare began. She came from a very racist family and they called me every name in the book! I won't begin to try to count how many times I was called n*gger, jungle bunny etc. It went on and on. Her mother would hide me in the closet when company came and beat me if I cried. She, my womb donor was weak and uncaring. She told me to tell her white boyfriends I was the maid's child. Except this trailer trash family never had a maid! I hated this entire family and wanted nothing more than to get away from them. But the father did not know me and I assumed, he did not want me either. But God is merciful, one day he met us at the park. He and my mother began to talk( I think he was just being friendly) but he looked at me, and I knew, that he knew I was his. His eyes got big and he asked my 'mother' about me. She said that he had knocked her up and messed up her life. He ran back to the car and told his family. That night they all showed up at the house. I was in the closet crying because mom had some white people over so I could not come out. I heard shouting and swearing and my mother lying about where I was. I started to cry in terror. Suddenly the door was yanked open and my father stood there. When he saw me in that dirty closet, wearing rags and eating three day old bread, he began to cry. My black grandma snatched me into her big warm arms, then she turned and cursed my white family out. My grandma took me that night, and I have never been happier. I now have a real family that truly loves me. I cannot tell you how wonderful that is. I'm grown now but I still remember that scared little girl on the closet floor. I still remember being told if I had been white I would be good enough to eat with them. I still remember the pain. I just want to say to ww who want to try something new, PLEASE think about the children you will bear. I have 2 friends who have black moms and white fathers and they had warm wonderful lives, I also have a friend like me with a white mom who was ashamed of black and she had a horrible life. Unfortunately for her, her dad was no better than her mom. He did not care how horrible her mom treated her, he just wants to sleep with white women. He has left two other young girls in similar situations. She told me, her mom actually tried to paint her face white when she was young before she took her out with her! Candace, my friend still cries when she thinks about it. We both think WW should not have black children unless they are really, really, ready and not racist at all. If you have a black mom and your dad is a racist pig at least you have your mom to love and protect you. But if you are like us, and you have no dad and a racist or uncaring mom, then you have nobody. And it's a sad lonely world when you have nobody. Thank God for my black family. I try to be a family to Candace because she has nobody. Sometimes she seems so sad when we are with Megan, and Julie, their moms would take a bullet for them (so would their white dads) but she only has us girls... Please Sara, tell ww not to sleep with bm if they don't want black babies.....

Dear ________________
I am so very sorry for all you have endured. But I am eternally grateful you could count on your father and his family. I know the blessing that family is, yet I also know how much racism can hurt. I remember a time when my baby brother, Pedro was about 3, and a half years old. He is half Spanish and my sister was angry at his father. She called him a spic, and said that Puerto Ricans could not be trusted. I want to point out that she was really, really angry and normally did not talk this way. Anyway, I remember it like it was yesterday because my precious little baby brother began to cry! He looked up at us and said "If you hate Spanish people then you hate me because I'm Spanish too! With that he buried his curly little head in his hands and cried. Both my sister and I began to cry. We both love him dearly and hated to see him hurt. She apologized profusely and told him that she was wrong. She has, to my knowledge, never made another racial slur against Spanish people.You see she hurt someone she loved dearly, and that's enough to stop most people in their tracks. Most of the time love does concur all, but I guess not always. I'm so sorry about your mom, but it truly is her loss because you sound like a fantastic person and she has really missed out. Pray for her and pity her because you were a precious gift and she was too foolish to see it...

May God bless you.....Sara

111 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am speechless.

Thank you for sharing.

Velvet Queen said...

I was nearly set on tears when I read this woman’s story. I cannot begin to express with words how revolting this was to me. Alright, maybe I’m a bit too emotional at times but who can read this and not feel almost sick? One of the things I hate is people being abused who can do little to nothing to protect themselves, ESPECIALLY children. It’s abominable. I am so happy that God allowed her father to discover her existence and that he came and took her away. Now that’s what a real man would do for his daughter. I still don’t understand how a “racist” white woman could sleep with a non-white man in the first place. If she does have a child with this non-white man, why doesn’t she be humane and put the child up for adoption? Why would she subject an innocent child to such abuse when she knows she’ll not treat her like she would a “white” child? I’ve read about situations like these in books but I’m sure the reality is much too deep to be even written on to paper. This is much too upsetting.

Anonymous said...

Sara, I can really relate to this lady because I had a similar life. I was born to a ww who already had 3 white children when she had an affair with a bm. She was a racist who just wanted to 'try it' Well, I wish to God I had, had a loving father to take me away! She constantly let her family call me names, she made me eat separate from the family, She refused to buy me decent clothes or call her mom. She, and all the rest of the family called me monkey, and other horrible names. To this day 40 years after my birth I have had no one to love me. I married a bm about 15 years ago but he only wanted me because I was light skinned. My white family refused to come to the wedding and when a more attractive light skinned woman made eyes at my husband, He dropped me with a quickness, even though we had 4 kids by then. I have never love except for my children. When you speak of the love you feel for your family members regardless of their race, I seethe with jealously. I always wanted that. To this day my white family does not speak to me. My white brothers and sister see me in town sometimes and turn their heads. They have all mistreated me for years, yet they hate me like I mistreated them. When my white mother passed she was a very wealthy woman. She left my sister, and brothers houses and cars. She left me a mop and a broom saying that all I was fit to be was somebody's maid. I hate that ww are allowed to have and keep black children without prooving that they really want them and will love them. Listening to you talk sometimes, I can tell you come from a very loving family, and to be honest, sometimes I resent you. That trashy ww never loved me.-none of her people ever loved me. How come no loving father ever came to take me away?

kimmy said...

Hi Everyone.
I watched a show (can't remember name) but it was a brown skinned woman who had a white mom (you could not tell-she looked reg. blk) But she was mistreated by her ww mother and her father got her mom preg. and ran off. Then her mom took it out on her. She treated her horribly her whole life. then one day the girl goes looking for her blk family and she finds her sister. Her dad had done the same thing with her mom. And her sister had led almost an identical life! With a white mom who was ashamed of her too, and had hidden her when white people came in or said she was the maid's kid. I remember she and the sister were both crying when they found each other because now they had someone to love them! Neither of their moms had. and their sorry father just went around sleeping with ww and leaving town! It was so sad. I remember crying all through it esp. when the little girl tried to look white so her white family would love her......
I would definitely agree -please don't lay down with blk men if you are not ready to have a blk child. that is so unfair I can't even begin to describe it! Every child deserves to grow up in love and compassion. I know some ww love their black kids like there is no tommorrow, but some are having blk babies accidentally, and treating them like garbage....

Clarice said...

unfortunately many WW do not think of the affect their actions will have on those around them - because culturally there is no sense of accountability for them. They are by and large not held accountable for themselves or their actions,with exceptions only in extreme cases - sounds like another group of individuals. WW are culturally program to be attention seeking i.e. world revolves around me and that motivates many to do things to attract attention i.e. the 'ethnic experience' - just to get a reaction and attention from society - family members etc. Collectively never having experienced the feeling of 'the otherness' that culturally people with visibly different ethnic backgrounds i.e. darker skin color, facial features or having had to endure the racism, taunting, cruel or careless comments and daily inconsideration that goes with that experience of otherness in this culture - they have no clue that it even exsists muchless that it hurts. Not all WW are clueless or completely self absorbed but it is a collective character trait resulting from cultural conditioning. It is good that after all the evil (cruelty to children is just evil) and injustice that this young woman has experienced she was/is now in a better situation. The damage that is done to the person based on the accounts here lasts a life time.The only way for a person to deal with it - is to accept that it is NOT you and does not determine your worth or value - it is a reflection of the other persons character flaws and they way you are treated or have been treated in the past does not determine the future. Give yourself the love and caring and support that you did not receive through no fault of your own - make taking care of yourself emotionally, spiritually, psychologically a priority - and get as far away from negative people as possible.

V/r

Clarice

Aphrodite said...

I am so sorry. I am just shocked. I think that is beyond cruel for a mother to be that way to a child.



There are no words to describe this. I don't believe in hell, but I pray that there is one waiting for these women. I despise people who abuse children.



I would think that a mother's love would trump any notion of race. I mean your child is a part of - an extension of you as a human being.



They chose to be involved with these men and if they didn't want children they could have taken steps to prevent pregnancy.



I think that the biracial women who have been hurt and wounded this way should perhaps get together and support one another someway to help each other heal through this. A support group or maybe a NING group.



You guys deserve to heal these wounds. Mother wounding is hard, but you guys can make it through this and grow to see yourselves with loving new eyes. Keep your heads up.



Keeping you in my thoughts.

Mary said...

this is truly the reason why i can't stand majority of bm. i completely expect ww to be idiotic to this level, especially when it comes to being racially insensitive (after living with them during undergrad, i know how self-absorbed these females are). but the bm who are SOOOOO proud of their ability to sleep with these morons, they're the ones i have a problem with. it shows how selfish most of them are, to only care about sleeping with these women and not giving a fig about their offsprings.

it also makes me think about my college years and how i used to see SOOOO many trailer trash white women on the city bus with their biracial children (all looking dirty btw). i remember i used to be amused by the picture cause obviously, the bm responsible for the child left his white precious "queen" to fend for herself. I was hoping that maybe trailer trash ww were getting the message…… they're no better than bw. anyways, ww and bm completely suck, they really do. i've always said i was glad to see them together but man, i didn't think that both were so damaged that they would harm their own offspring in this manner. at the same time though, i should have known, they're both very self-absorbed. I guess this is the dark side to the whole ww/bm interracial trend, cause that’s what it is at the end of the day, a TREND

I’m completely disgusted.

lola said...

To the woman who wrote this letter : You're a survivor and I do mean a REAL survivor because from the tone of this letter, like Sara stated, you sound like a totally cool person. Them racist people didn't kill your soul and that's the greatest victory!

And I'm convinced bi-racial children with black mothers are generally raised better, have a better sense of pride, and a better knowledge of their black heritage. I'm so disgusted by what I've just read, I never understood how any human could mistreat a child.

Not trying to kill hope here, but the ww who just want to try the "black d*ck" don't give a damn about consequences and are just selfish beings who just want to have their fun, they ain't THINKING about anything else but "the d*ck". They're just as selfish as the DBRBM who sleep with women just for their own pleasure and couldn't care less about getting girls pregnant.

Oh and one more thing, there's a growing number of single ww with bi-racial kids/ww infected with HIV. That's why I do NOT resent or envy WW. Some of them want to play the "I can have any BM cause Im better than you" game just to boost their ego, they can keep playing. When I see how Halle Berry (SEXIEST WOMAN ALIVE according to ESQUIRE) smiles with Gabriel, after what she went through with Wesley and Eric Benet, I say ww go ahead, take em and keep em (well that one will be hard cause most of them run away from their responsibilities, 70 to 73% of black households have no fathers in the homes).

energize said...

What a tragic way for a young girl to grow up. You just never know what people are dealing with when outside looking in.

I am so happy the young lady found some peace in her life. She is now able to encourage others who may be in her situation.

That's what it's about.
----------------------------
Lola said -
"after what she went through with Wesley and Eric Benet,"....
----------------------------
AND David Justice. Halle stated one of her boyfriends hit her so hard, she is now deaf in one ear. As far as I know, she never revealed his identity.

Anonymous said...

As a white male who was engaged once in his life, to a black woman, I can say that I sympathize with anyone going through racial situations. I found out my mother (who I love very much) had feelings she was unaware of. Two weeks before I started dating this woman, my mother said you'll find someone nice and I don't care what package God brings her in (this included race). She stopped talking to me the day I announced I was dating a black woman. She sat in silence when I announced my engagement to her and my father (who was always supportive, and insisted my mother would come around). She never did. When the relationship ended (not due to race, but in a silly barely understandable way I won't get into) my mother just started talking to me again. I can honestly say I've only loved one woman in my life. It wasn't a relief that it ended.

That said, this letter had me up to the line about being in a closet eating 3 day old bread. That was where it lost me. It smacks of fiction.

I love this site, and visit often. I haven't given up on love, and black women are still an option for this white male. Don't let anyone tell you you are not worthy of a happy relationship with a supportive spouse, regardless of race. And to be fair, that goes for ALL of us. God bless. -- Z

pikacute said...

This story just kicked my arse out of my pity party. I believe if you sleep with a man (birth control or not) you must aks your self "would I be ok having his child?". Not to break anyone's mood, but my sister used birth control (condom too) and she got pregnant. I hate it when ww and bm use each other that way and the kid ends up getting hurt. There are a lot of women who shouldn't be having children. Don't date interracially at all if you can't see having a bi-racial child. So many kids are screwed up because of this.
P.S Why did you say "black children"? I know the reality of the one drop rule, but these kids aren't black their bi-racial. No offense to anyone.

Halima said...

unfortunately many WW do not think of the affect their actions will have on those around them - because culturally there is no sense of accountability for them.

Truer words clarice. My heart goes out to these women.

here where i live we have a big problems with the number of mixed race children in foster care, deposited there by ww (yet everyone is so sensitive about pointing fingers at ww, dropping off their kids like a 'item of clothing' you changed your mind about). I know people who work in the system who know this ugly truth, but because of the air of fierce protectionism surrounding ww, they dont dare mention what they see day in day out. Some would rather talk about mental health problems than the trivial approach and unthinking, self absorbed way many many ww approach mixed partnering because apparently ww with 'lost minds' seem to have an afinity with having MR babies (according to that line of thought). So the problem remains because everyone is running around the real issue and no one is thus addressing it.

Consider that the utter entitlement of many ww means that if a bm disappears then suddenly it becomes a 'you expect me to look after your black baby, no deal'. Suddenly the child becomes 'black' and 'yours' rather than a part of me. And speaking about entitilement, i remember once a ww 'expert' saying at a panel that ww are not given the 'support' they need to bring up black babies, as if they need to be rewarded or given special favours to raise 'black' kids, yet bw have been raising these kids without expecting any handouts or support for years.

let me say that reading this post it seems giving a child up for adoption is the most humane thing some ww can do. i know a number of biracial women who harbour this dirty little secret of being detested by their white mums for their skin but they dare no speak openly about it!

clarice you are right, ww are in many respects like spoilt kids who have never had to learn to be accoutable and responsible the way wm have been hassled into being.

Many are not even able to do the (surely) little introspection required to know that their racial politics is at variance with their desires (ie use protection so you dont end up with an unwanted child). its just a sign of how self absorbed many are that they do not give fore thought to racial issues enough to understand that they are racist and when infatuation wanes, they cant stand idea of bringing a child into the world that they wouldnt be able to fully love. That they dont even know themselves that well!

think of the number of damaged black people (because lets face it, mr people are regarded as black) in the ranks at the moment due to the experinces they have gone through and how it is very easy to hate blackness and want to be white when blackness is seen to have caused you all that heartache. these ones are counted among black now when they feel anything but and react accordingly.

The Interracial Dating Book

Jules said...

Anon. you breaking up with someone you claim to still love over something silly and not her race-smacks of fiction to me!
This is a site for bw to talk about whatever we want to talk about and vent our feelings without judgement. If you want to call someone a liar in cowardly round about way, why don't you see yourself out!
Sorry Sara, if I am taking liberties, but that was extremely rude for him to indirectly call her a liar. And I suspect it's not because he did not beleive the story, I suspect it's because she knocked the wonderful white woman off her pedistal and he did not appreciate it.....

Taylor-Sara said...

You guys made excellent points. Halima and clarice you hit on the head as usual. And I would agree with that assessment Jules. Anon, you could be lying about being a wm once engaged to a bw for all we know -now couldn't you? So please don't come here and call my readers liars. Not to be rude, but this is a bw's site and YOU are a guest....

Harry Potter said...

Halima: "
here where i live we have a big problems with the number of mixed race children in foster care, deposited there by ww (yet everyone is so sensitive about pointing fingers at ww, dropping off their kids like a 'item of clothing' you changed your mind about)."

In attempts to scare bw away from wm I've often heard many rumors that wm ONLY want bw for sex. If this were the case, wouldn't there be an abundance of single bw with mixed babies? Yet it seems the only single women I see with mixed babies are ww.

pikacute said...

It's sad that in today's world you'd think humans would've learned that race isn't a big matter. Kids still can't be kids their black kids , or white kids. Not to point out anything but the realization is that that's how the world is today. You know when you give up a child of color biracial or black it's harder for them to get adopted. Unfortunetly it's cheaper to adopt a black child than it is to adopt a white child. A white child cost 2 times the amount of a black child. There are articles I could give someone who wants to learn about it. :)There's another factor that a lot of social worlers and the adoptian system aren't too fond of trans racial adoptian. I just want the kids to get adopted. If it's a good family who can deal with racial problems why can't they have the kid? It's not fair. I just want these kids to be loved

Clarice said...

Just when it seems that the limits of stupid has been reached it sinks lower "i remember once a ww 'expert' saying at a panel that ww are not given the 'support' they need to bring up black babies,"

What! Babies are babies - they need food, clothing shelter and to know that they are valued, loved, cherished and will be protected and provided for as human beings deserving of respect and dignity. All children need to be taught about their culture and ethnic history as well as those of others in order to take their place in the world and treat themselves and others with dignity, humanity, respect and kindness.

Anon, for the moment overlooking your thought free comment - questioning the veracity of the account provided, it sounds like fiction because - it is hard to believe that any person could be that cruel to a child that is dependent on them for sustenance.

The mind of humans rightly, balks at that because except in extreme cases even animals will not abandon their young or deny them food. Hearing that a woman because women are seen as the source from whence life springs behaving worse than animals is hard to grasp - but it happens day in and day out even if it does not make the news and is not seen or acknowledged by privileged folks.

Clarice

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

OMG, this is horrible!!! I've never heard of anything like this, for this is so sad. All I can say is, may God heal your heart totally from this incident.

Shame on your mother and her family though, for that is VERY messed up (I'm trying not to cuss)...

lola said...

That said, this letter had me up to the line about being in a closet eating 3 day old bread. That was where it lost me. It smacks of fiction.

There are babies being RAPED and killed in this world, little kids being enslaved in some countries, but a child eating a 3 day old bread in a closet is "fiction" (not minimizing her sufferings, just trying to make a point) ? Please.

Felicity said...

To be honest, people don't think, they just have sex and then when the baby comes, there is massive confusion. I find it very difficult to understand, if you don't want the child, why did you have sex with the father.

Halima said...

I find it very difficult to understand, if you don't want the child, why did you have sex with the father.

This is the thing felicity, i dont think these women get pregnant by mistake (the bulk of them that is). i think they were all for the idea of a black baby, as a result of the very shallow and self centred approach many have, and being very unthinking (a privilged white female position), this is revealed by the fact that once the bm decideds to leave the picture, suddenly, 'I cant deal with a black child'. Firstly they might have just engaged with the idea of 'having a cute baby', or being sweet talked by DBR who fawn over their skin and salivate over the idea of a light child (in theory), thse women feel that they are all that and are ok with being given this exhalted position above bw etc. But without the bm, that fantasy collapses and suddenly the child becomes a burden and a mocker for them.

so folks i feel this is not necessarily about using protection, they are all for the idea because they didnt think it through and were on some trip when they made the decision (unlike others who give these issues due thought and consideration).


Harry Potter, mind games have always been used against bw this way and we have continued to fall for it, or should i say colluded with it. Black chidren are way way overrepresented in foster homes according to stats over here, and i mean to the extent that it is uncomfortable. and 70% of these black children are mr children. Yet knowing what gives, no one wants to 'codify' the observed fact that ww are dropping off their mr kids due to calling a spade a spade, racism. So the problem persists because no one wants to address the real issue (ww protectionism).

if they reflected back their findings to the society at least by now, ww would be increasingly aware and educated to think through these decisions in a way that many are not doing at present!

Anonymous said...

"She stopped talking to me the day I announced I was dating a black woman. She sat in silence when I announced my engagement to her and my father (who was always supportive, and insisted my mother would come around). She never did."

white women are inferior as mothers compared to asian women and black women. being a child of one too i think i can speak to that point. just consider it good riddance when something like this happens, and be happy for your children who will get something more deserving because of you marrying out as a white guy

Anonymous said...

Jules,

You couldn't be more wrong about me, but that is okay.
I'm not trying to convince you. Not my job. But if you
can honestly read a story about kicked in doors, and
living in a closet on 3-day old bread and think its
real, well, God love you dear. And what is wrong with
3-day old bread? I eat older bread than that (as do
most of us).

As for MY situation: the breakup wasn't the point sweets.
My mother raining hatred on my joy was. And, for the record,
her mother (my maternal grandmother) did the same. And I
was, and am shocked by that. And I still love them both.

If you don't want to believe me, then I can only imagine
you read this site but don't understand it, because you
are trying (although not succeeding) to push away the very
kind of man you ladies claim to want (ie, a white man who
respects and GASP loves black women).

White woman on a pedistal? LOL! From a WHITE guy who is
always saying, "wow, she is pretty........for a white girl",
uhm, NO. But nice try dear! God Bless. -- Z

sally said...

I came across an online community for individual seeking interracial love. It is ++++((((---Blackwhitemeet. C O M))))++++ All singles there are seeking interracial relationships. Interracial is not a problem here, but a great merit to cherish!

Anonymous said...

The MR-child is born and the parents do not want the child so who is really responsible for this child? Society!

And, yes the majority of bw who have mr-children do keep their kids...I did it. As my son grew there were a few times I too had to put up with strangers or ppl. I wasn't that familiar with asking me is that your child? Sometimes, I wanted to say mind your business.

I used to tell my best friend if it weren't not for my son's hair(that is how most ppl. first noticed that he was MR) those same people probably could care less about this young bb; but, since he looks MR now some ppl. want to pay attention. On the other hand, there were those adults who seem indifferent to my son... as long as they did not hurt him I was ok.
Although, I had a situation at a nursey. My son was under 2 yrs. old and wasn't able to really communicate his thoughts and feelings to me. One day I was taking him to his new nursury and
he began crying and he did not want to get off the bus. And, the final straw one of the nursey school teachers had told me in a very calm voice that my son had gotten a piece of crayons shavens in his nose and she suggested that I take him to the doctor. The lady said it in such a calm voice I thought it is a small piece and that he probably blew it out. The next day she asked me what did the Doc. say and looking confused say I did not go to the Doc.
NOW, she becomes alarmed and points out to me that my son had a big fat crayon stucked up his nose-it was the tip about a 1/2 or less of the tip. The owner allowed these females almost complete controll of these classes and she had a couple of other schools to monitor. The owner when she found out was visiably upset. I do not believe the owner knew and the teachers were trying to hide what had happened. I do not want to imagine what those _itches did to my son. But, God must have kept me naive...because I am not above hurting someone over my child. That is how most of us bw are about our children. Today, my son is 24 and he can annoy his mother; however, I will still kick $ss over my adult son...call me mammie...whatever. My love for my son means more. I should have sued as a cousin advised; but, I was so relieved to have my child safe.
There was such a difference between that nursery and the one that was only seven blocks away. My son was so happy to go to nursey school he would run away from me. No crying ever.

Ladies, keep in mind that this happened before the public outcry about watching for signs of child abuse and he was my first and I was between 24-25yrs.

Ladies, pay attention to your children's behavior maybe that is a sign that you may need to exam closer and STOP SAYING THINGS LIKE MY CHILD IS BAD AND HE IS JUST ACTING THAT WAY...MAYBE HE IS NOT JUST ACTING. Children are smarter than alot of us adults give them credit for.

CHILDREN ARE A 18 YEAR OR MORE COMMITTMENT. IF YOUR ARE NOT READY FOR THE COMMITTMENT THEN USE PROCAUTIONS.

Ann

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Taylor-Sara said...

Hey Anon. so glad your baby (well man now) is ok. You really do have to follow your gut instict. I remember when my baby was 2-3 years old and I took her to a sister named Ms Marg. I told Ms M. over and over do notleave her with anyone else, I am extemely protective and fussy about my child. Well, I had a weird feeling in my stomache. And as I tried to leave my baby kept reaching for me and crying. This is typical behavior for a child who is very attached to her parent so I kept trying to leave but that nagging feeling was getting stronger. As I rounded the bend to leave the complex, the feeling became overwhelming and I was forced to go back. What do I see? Ms M leaving from the back lot WITHOUT MY CHILD!!! I rushed to her door and knocked furiously -threatning whoever had her, that I was going to break it down. A young teenage boy finally opened it and reluctantly shoved my daughter to me. This B*tch was going to leave my precious 3 year old with her no good son!!!( She had told me he lived with his father in another state) I snatched my precious child and never spoke to her again-except to tell her to go straight to hell, and not to pass go....

pikacute said...

I C/S with Taylor Sara. Listen to your kids. I remember my mom used to take me to this evil lady (she was two faced). I had bad seperation anxiety as a child. Whenever my mom dropped me off I would cry. When I cried she would beat me. It was horrible. One time she hit me so hard on my mouth my lip bleed. When my mom found out I never went back there again.

Phantom Mare said...

I had NO idea that alot of biracial children go through this. I mean, I have heard of a situation where a biracial girl when she was a baby, her mother poured hot grease on her-because of her background. When I heard this I was quite shocked she would do this to her own child, but in my mind it would seem isolated. But wow, I had NO idea it was more wide spread. Phew!!

On Children- LISTEN to your children, listen to your children, listen to your children. And oh- Listen to your children.

Someone earlier mentioned the HIV increase among ww when dealing with bm. I kind of thought that would start occuring.

Anonymous said...

Just a question. Why only blame bm for ww getting HIV...who is to say the female wasn't involved with other race men who may have had HIV? Think ladies think.

Anonymous said...

I used to think Byron Allen in the above picture was gay? A few months ago one of those entertainment programs said he was going to be a father...lol, he likes women? Who knew...other race women.

ann

Lena said...

That is so heartbreaking. I could never do that to an innocent child.
Women like that are sick!
They shouldn't be allowed to get away with such wanton cruelty simply because they are white women.

I agree people should listen to their children.

Anonymous said...

'Why only blame bm for ww getting HIV...'

why not? bm are passing on the disease in higher percentages than any non-bm while bm are in fact a lot fewer in numbers than non-bm are in many places. that makes them the single biggest proliferator of hiv among all groups of women. why treat a fact like that with a velvet glove when its something so serious? did you never 'think' any of this through before or something?

Anonymous said...

I lived for years poolside in an upstate NY condo complex. I teach, so when the pool opened for the summer season, I spent much time in my home office, at the balcony, writing, researching, eating, watching TV (at night or when taking a break). For YEARS, I wanted to call 911 on the various white mothers I saw with their half Black DAUGHTERS at the pool. I never saw hitting or anything physical; I ALWAYS saw disregard, disrespect, annoyance, impatience, and neglect. My heart broke for these girls; my temper would flare. And what to do? Also: when I'd see these girls up close (e.g., happening upon them while picking up mail or walking), they would be FRIGHTENED of me -- and from what I'd grown accustomed to seeing in those parts -- based on my simply being a Black woman. So in addition to being emotionally (and likely physically) abused? They had no ability to see(k) kinship with someone who could be an oasis, confidante, or supporter. Now, the white women with Black boys at the pool? ALWAYS had the Black daddy with 'em and LOVED THOSE BOYS BEYOND BELIEF. Oh, the smiles, gentle touches, hugs: unreal. The girls from these CLEARLY abandoned white women (none of whom, by the way, were attractive women at all)? Got NOTHING.

But, I've seen a boy child treated similarly most recently. A mixed-race (BM/WW) male friend and I happened upon a mixed WF/BM couple with a little boy. The mother continuously spoke harshly to the boy; the father sat by, mute (and daddy was GREAT-LOOKING, too; unreal, as the mother was average). The child was clearly regarded by the mother as a pain and problem; the father said nothing to indicate anything to the contrary. My friend said kind words about the boy's hair, comparing it to his own when he was a little one. The mother went on and on about how they didn't know what to do with it and it was SUCH a PROBLEM. Daddy sat by, mute. All I could think was WHAT FRIGGIN' IDIOTS. I said a prayer for that boy.

Taylor-Sara said...

That poor child! raised with a unfeeling witch and a punk mut of a father. What some poor children have to deal with! And what makes me so mad is that I see bm who wont allow a bw to even open her mouth will let ww walk all over them to the extent that they wont even protect their own kids, for fear of offending these women! It sems these women are given carte blanche to treat these kids anyway they want by the fathers, the law, the neighbors etc. It's so sad...

Anonymous said...

@annonymous- 10:36 a.m. that little boy probably was not his child and that is probably why he did not say anything to the mother...maybe. Did your friend suggest taking the child to a barber or even a b barber. On the other hand, after going to a bm barber who did not know exactly how to cut my son's hair, I simply decided to take him to Super Cuts. Those ladies did a great job and he still goes to the same Super Cuts. End of problem.

Ann

Anonymous said...

Ann, it was not about his hair! It was about the way he and other mixed race children are being treated by their white mothers! Did you read it through? Her friend just mentioned the hair to talk to her about the child-jeez some ppl are as thick as a brick wall!

JaliliMaster said...

"Just a question. Why only blame bm for ww getting HIV...who is to say the female wasn't involved with other race men who may have had HIV? Think ladies think."

Yes, it is true that ww get HIV from other races of men as well. However, it is worth noting, that the women with the highest infection rate, not too surprisingly, are those that sleep with black men. No point ignoring the facts. Even in England, there was a story of a woman(they showed her picture, she was a blonde ww of average/above average looks). She was on trial because she had intentionally infected several men with HIV. The police believed that she had more victims than they had discovered(they knew of about ten to twelve of the men she had infected). Her defence was that she had been infected by a man who knew he had AIDS, so she wanted to get her revenge. Naturally, many of us just assumed she was getting her revenge on any man. Later, when some of the pictures of her victims were shown(those who agreed to testify), EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM WAS A BLACK MALE. Every. Single. One. It turns out, it was a black guy who infected her(he knew he had the disease but didn't care).

This woman did not date bm exclusively. In fact, most of the time she dated white men. However, whenever she slept with a white man, she made a point of using protection to PROTECT HIM, because she had found out she had HIV. She claimed that she wasn't 100% guilty as it was easy to sleep with black men and get them to not use condoms. It was as if many of them considered it a compliment that she would allow them go raw(sorry for the language).

However, what really annoyed me was when it was revealed that though the police had contacted all her past partners that she had had since she found out she had HIV, a good many of the black ones did not even want to know. They refused to get a test in case they were positive. Also, many of them had cheated on their partners(in many cases, their girlfriends were white, some black), so didn't want the gf to find out. Now these women would be sleeping with a guy who has HIV and don't even know.

Anonymous said...

Jailmaster that's horrible! You see why some bw are writing bm off for good! How can you be so sexaully and socially irresponsible as to not want to know to protect someone you CLAIM to love??? This is why we need to leave their sick, twisted azzes behind! Too many of them are just too damaged and evil and STUPID for words!! Sara, some ppl think you are too hard on bm. I for one think you are way too soft!! These sleezeballs don't give a damn about anyone but themselves....(SMH)

sky said...

after reading the pass it on HIV im glad ive jumped over the fence. not to say wm don't have the disease but i won't have to deal w/ this type of nonsense. i have always told myself "everytime, use a condom". i remember one guy try to convince me to do it w/out one. that God im strong headed, i told him no and next time dont come w/ out one. that was the end of him. i love myself first. we can't play in this day in age.

Anonymous said...

@Jailmaster, lets be more specific in London most of those men originated from Africa and not the U.S.

Anonymous said...

@ anon. 4:21 pm I was only referring to myself and not those females. Peace.

Ann

Anonymous said...

@ anon. 4:21pm I just re-read the part that the mother said she could not do anything with her son's hair. Therefore, you re-read.
Peace.

Ann

Taylor-Sara said...

ok,lets not come on here to start stuff. Once you have made your point-learn to let things go-thank you -S

Anonymous said...

I'm the Anonymous who wrote about the mixed race girls AND the one boy treated horribly by white mothers. I am weighing in again, as I don't want folks to be confused. First: the child WAS the BM's son. How do I know? Because the white woman kept saying "Didn't Daddy once tell you to eat with your mouth closed?!", and the like. That WW didn't consult my biracial male friend for suggestions; she wasn't looking for "help;" she was looking to complain about HER unique "Black hair Burden," the Beeyotch.

(Please note: I've encountered this syndrome with a white foster mother of a ton of Black kids. My white friend invited me to her foster parent orientation graduation; the braggart wanted to give her kudos re: her taking on "alla these Black chirrens." I wouldn't. She tried to get a lil' sisterhood by bemoaning the struggle with keeping her foster kids' hair kempt, saying "I don't envy anyone that job." I coldly said to her "Oh, my; I DO hope you're not visiting that energy upon those kids; that's emotionally abusive." She backed the EFF off.)

As to whether my biracial male friend offered a suggestion as to the boy's hair? Yes, he did. He said "Oh, it's great; just leave it alone; let it be free; that's what my mom and dad did." He told me later (and after I affirmed his suggestion, saying that too much drama is visited upon Black kids' hair) that he WANTED to add "The girls will LOVE him and that hair!," BUT he didn't know how they'd take that (I suspected that low "father" would've perked right up.)

May I also add that NO ONE IS MENTIONING THE NUMBERS OF BLACK GIRLS who suffered as well? I'm not casting aspersions; however, I AM noting for the record that the hue and cry has been over the ONE boy I mentioned. The damage as to our value, self-worth(lessness?), and hierarchical norms are more than a notion, even on such an enlightened blog, even from its enligtened readers.

Taylor-Sara said...

Anon, I guess you're right. I'm not sure why I grabbed onto the boy because I'm truly horrified for these little girls. Truly I am. My white Aunts all love their kids furiously, I never imagined how it could be any other way regardless of a child's racial makeup. But I do remember seeing in McDonalds a ww treating her biracial kids like garbage. Then she complained to another ww that she how their no good daddy had run out on her and she should 'just get rid of them' right in front of the poor little kids. They looked so sad. I remember my mom saying to her. "why don't you, they'll certainly be better off with ppl who love them!" Both women glared at my mother and flounced away. See no one is ever supposed to call them on their mess. I think alot of ww just want a tall handsome blk man but not the little remnants he might leave behind... I feel so bad for all these little kids.

Anonymous said...

I have a friend that is Mexican and married to a black guy. We were pregnant at the same time and were bothe expecting girls. I just figured that if you married someone of a different race you have to be ready to love a child that doesn't look like you in ways that the world deems important. I am married to a WM so if I got kids that looked white then I had to be ready to deal with the stares and comments etc that come with having MR white looking kids. Anyway I guess my friend thought that she was just gonna have a tanned little mexican child, but that wasn't in the cards. Her child looks more blk than mexican and has blk people's hair. I guess it never occurred to her that this might happen. She loves her child don't get me wrong and treats her really good, but she would always complain about her hair. I had to tell her to stop doing that b/c she will make the child think that something is wrong with her. Also the child is rarely around the blk side of the family...lots of drama goes on on that side so my frined and her family have reduced contact with the blk side. So if the child isn't around blk people and only around mexican and white people she may not like her looks b/c she's different and her mom complains about the things that are different about her. She doesn't complain any more (around me anyway)and has her hair done at a salon (braids etc) so that it looks really nice all the time. Iti's just funny to me. They marry black people but don't want the children with the features that result from these relationships. I don't get it.

Halima said...

I just figured that if you married someone of a different race you have to be ready to love a child that doesn't look like you in ways that the world deems important.

Ah ha the greatest block to seeing, the behavior of a significant portion of ww towards their mr children, this as well as the trusting that motherhood and the pure love of a mother could not possibly contain something as ugly as race prejudice etc. I mean how can one be with a black man and not be progressive and anti-racist. If only folks knew what gets covered over. indeed WW tend to have many assumptions protecting them from the full glare and scrutiny of their actions. This is often why their behavior or misbehavior flies under the radar.

I think this is one which only MR children can reveal to society, because no one else will be believed. unless they are willing to break with 'mother-child' loyalty, most of this stuff will continue unchalleneged. You can only imagine how many people have complexes, self-doubt, self-hate, low esteem you name it, as a result. and the numbers are set to rise!

Anonymous said...

I must admit I like the way Halle Berry's mother raised her. When Halle was younger she may have been having an indentity crisis. One day her mother told her to look in the mirror and tell me what you see? One of the things Halle's mother told her was that you see a black woman. That realization may have helped Halle to have an identity that she could hold onto.
After all we all know that other race people see Halle as an A A woman. On the other hand, Tiger's daughter may have a BIG identity crisis.

a.f.

Anonymous said...

Just a question? What are bw expected to do as far as other race women and their mr-child(ren) are concern?
And, I agree that mr-adults are the people who need to bring this type of issue to the public's attention.

a.f.

lola said...

Now, the white women with Black boys at the pool? ALWAYS had the Black daddy with 'em and LOVED THOSE BOYS BEYOND BELIEF. Oh, the smiles, gentle touches, hugs: unreal. The girls from these CLEARLY abandoned white women (none of whom, by the way, were attractive women at all)? Got NOTHING.

I believe most of these baby girls are abandonned by their racist fathers and mothers because these little girls represent the "black female" that they hate so much. DBRww hate BW just as much as DBRbm, they don't wanna raise the "mule of the earth", the "lowest human ever" (in their eyes). But the boys, OH THE BOYS are the "kings", the future "epitomy of masculinity". This is pretty much like those girls in most countries who are considered BURDENS to families while boys are considered BLESSINGS. I'm so frustrated and sad!

lola said...

What some poor children have to deal with! And what makes me so mad is that I see bm who wont allow a bw to even open her mouth will let ww walk all over them to the extent that they wont even protect their own kids, for fear of offending these women!

And these cats wants people to call them "real men"? It's funny we're talking about this because yesterday I saw a BM/WW couple arguing, the guy was BEGGING the woman to sit and talk, BEGGING like his life depended on it!! If he was paid a dollar everytime he said "PLEASE" he'd be a billionnaire. You could tell the problem wasn't that serious (not serious enough for him to beg her) and she was just playing him. You could tell she dominated him. But had that been a BW being pissed, this guy would have publicly "HANDLED HER".

lola said...

after reading the pass it on HIV im glad ive jumped over the fence. not to say wm don't have the disease but i won't have to deal w/ this type of nonsense.

Sky, me too. I'm focusing on the Alejandro's, Chin Dao Lee's and Richard's of the world.

keke said...

lola, thank you girl! I was watching some trashy talk show I usually avoid (ether jerry or maury) and the bm/ww had a young daughter that he was complaining she ignored and neglected. Well she slipped and said N*gger if you don't like it you can leave and take her with you! The audience gasped and the bw in the audience jumped up to let her have it and he jumped his stupid ass up to defend her and beg her to forgive him for questioning him! He all but got on his stupid ass knees to beg this trash for forgiveness! They are sooo disgusting! And on cheaters, the ww was cheating on her bm fiance with another wm and putting the hotel bill on HIS credit card! When the bm found out (because she was bringing her sorry trifling behind back without washing-and he smelled it) He got cheaters and they showed him video of the affair, as well as her using his cc for dinners, dancing, and hotels. He broke down and cried like a baby and then tried to go after the man -not her! When cheaters confronted her, she said "Well, what the hell made him think he was good enough to marry a white girl!" This stupid mofo-the went and begged this little tramp to take him back-and stop cheating on him!! They make me want to gag! That's another thing you almost never see, you never see bw think wm are too good for us. We may wonder whether they are attracted to us, or whether we are attracted to them, but we never think or ACT like they are better than us-and we sure as hell would never allow THEM TO THINK IT!!!

Phantom Mare said...

They marry black people but don't want the children with the features that result from these relationships. I don't get it.
_____________________

PM-I am clueless about this too.
As the title to this subject suggests. THINK before you COPULATE with BM! THINK reeeeeaaalll hard.

*****
"Well, what the hell made him think he was good enough to marry a white girl!" This stupid mofo-the went and begged this little tramp to take him back-and stop cheating on him!! They make me want to gag! That's another thing you almost never see, you never see bw think wm are too good for us. We may wonder whether they are attracted to us, or whether we are attracted to them, but we never think or ACT like they are better than us-and we sure as hell would never allow THEM TO THINK IT!!!
_________________________

PM- This is plain sickening. Not to say that BW/WM are deity perfect- but geesh! BW are certainly not going to allow for it MOST of the time. If we are thinking women and we don't take it from BM, we sure as heck will not take it from WM! LOL. That's just the way it seems.

This proves to me that BM has his
female idol to bow and worship to and make offerings unto the deitess....including "sacrificing" his own children for her sake.

Velvet Queen said...

I was reading the rest of these comments and I had to add this to this conversation. I think this may be a little off the subject …forgive me if this is so.

I’ve noticed that many black men with white girlfriends, or wives could be walking arm-in-arm with them but the moment an attractive black woman comes by they have to stare her down. I’m not sure if this is a stare out of malice or lust (or both) but it sure happens a lot.

What I don’t understand is they could be walking with their families (white women, bi-ethnic children) and they still will stare you down right in front of their significant others! All of a sudden these white women will get all strange, and start being loud, or give that black woman a really evil glare, pick up their children (mind you, that they were just ignoring), and start goo-goo/ga-ga-ing over them. These are times when I decide it’s a good time to disappear somewhere else but they seem to mysteriously find themselves in your presence yet again… fawning over their children. Now mothers fawn over their children but I think its kind’ve obvious when its completely exaggerated. So fake.

Secondly, black men are no better…they’ll either suddenly ignore their white girlfriend (or non-black girlfriend) and trophy kids, and wink at you or they’ll start getting all lovey with their girlfriends…AND STILL LOOK AT YOU.

Makes me wonder what these types of black men think black women are for.

I really wonder how white women feel about those sorts of situations. They have children with black men…but it’s such a rough ride. As if they have to fight to keep them in one place. It’s sad actually. And when black men DO leave them, so many white women take it out on their children…as if a child was going to keep a damaged man put in the first place.

sky said...

thanks keke for sharing. these men are pathetic. they don't care if their women cheats on them as long as they have a ww. bet if it were a bw he would have called her everything from hell and would have left her. looks like the ww didn't turn out to be everthing he dreamed of. so much for no more drama.

energize said...

"I’ve noticed that many black men with white girlfriends, or wives could be walking arm-in-arm with them but the moment an attractive black woman comes by they have to stare her down. I’m not sure if this is a stare out of malice or lust (or both) but it sure happens a lot."
------------------

I've also noticed the behavior. It looks more like lust to me because it is in his eyes. He starts looking at the top gliding down to the lower extremities.

I was in church one Sunday and a bm walked in with his ww wife? and mr kids. Then, a tall beautiful bw walked in and that man could not stop looking at her. I do believe his wife noticed. I was sitting behind him smh.

And if the ww knows her bm is attracted to you, she may suddenly want to be your pal.

Such an unhealthy environment for children filled with insecurities and phony motives.

Selena said...

All of a sudden these white women will get all strange, and start being loud, or give that black woman a really evil glare, pick up their children (mind you, that they were just ignoring), and start goo-goo/ga-ga-ing over them.

I noticed this when ww are with their white husbands/bfs. I think its all about ww just being down right insecure period!

Whenever I'm out and about and a wm and his ww girlfriend/wife are approaching me, the ww instantly will grab his hand or place her arm around him or some other form of pda. Keep in mind it does nothing to stop the wm from staring LOL. I used to dart my glancess away but now I stare/flirt right back. BTW it seems like the looks and flirting is getting bolder and bolder from wm...

lola said...

@ Keke,
This is pathetic!!!! OMG I don't even know what to say. Where's the dignity? How you're gonna have an ego with the people who sacrificed for you, but you're like a little SLAVE to some non-bw/ww who cheats on you using YOUR money and humiliates you on camera?? These are the same ppl saying we're "running to massa"? The vast majority of BW with WM are accomplished, smart, independent women w/ a personality, in other words BW are their own masters they don't have that slave mentality & behavior. These DBR people are sad.

@ Velvet queen,
And all of this reinforces my feeling that being pro-IR is one of the best decisions I've made in my life. Everytime I see these guys act like clowns I'm just grateful I'm not emotionally attached to them anymore. I'm living drama-free!

starkitty50 said...

Wow, that is beyond sad. I just can't believe any one would neglect their child out of ignorance like that. It says a lot about the lack of quality in a person who just wants to try someone based on race, but then bring a life into the world and have no clue about how to educate them enough to be in the real world and be proud of who they are. It is terrible. These women are breeders, no better than cats or dogs. They are not real mothers.

Clarice said...

"Selena said... All of a sudden these white women will get all strange, and start being loud, or give that black woman a really evil glare, pick up their children (mind you, that they were just ignoring), and start goo-goo/ga-ga-ing over them. I noticed this when ww are with their white husbands/bfs. I think its all about ww just being down right insecure period!"

It's because both the BM and the WW in situations like that are insecure. He is manipulating her insecurities to 'keep her in check' i.e. I can trade you in for BW and she will be glad to have me - so you better act like you know. WW in situations like this are insecure because he is always playing these games and she is afraid and rather than stand up for herself and check him - because she feels that w/ MR children WM won't want her or that WM won't want her after she's been w/ a BM.

Insecurity married to insecurity with children caught in the middle.

V/r

Clarice

Phantom Mare said...

I used to think Byron Allen in the above picture was gay? A few months ago one of those entertainment programs said he was going to be a father...lol, he likes women? Who knew...other race women.

ann

_________________________

That doesn't mean anything...LOL.

BM STILL marry BW and run around on the DL, which causes a rise in HIV cases among married BW.
Many WW hadn't gotten this memo yet.

Aphrodite said...

"I’ve noticed that many black men with white girlfriends, or wives could be walking arm-in-arm with them but the moment an attractive black woman comes by they have to stare her down. I’m not sure if this is a stare out of malice or lust (or both) but it sure happens a lot."




I had this to happen to me once on a flight from Cali to the South. It was the creepiest thing. It was a BM, his Asian wife, and their son.



They had pre-boarded and I was in the next boarding group looking for a seat.



I passed by his aisle, he was still kind of standing and he gave me the nastiest look with slit eyes.



I thought he wanted to kill me. It scared the "stuff" out of me. And then he started this stupid smirk.

It pissed me off and he was at least x teen years older than I was at least late 30's to 40's.


I still want to beat him with a brick.

Anonymous said...

American females have more choices whereas some of the females in third world type of countries do not have much a choice. With all its problems God still blesses America.

a.f.

Anonymous said...

LOL @ aphrodite how old was the guy 30's or 40's wow ancient. That was a funny statement and the guy could actually stand up without any assistance.

a.f.

TC said...

Aphrodite, you're not the only one ready to brain someone. These past weeks I've been plagued by racist WW and strange BM who think it's okay to touch strangers, and then have the nerve to get mad when I tell them hands off, LOL. I've been on edge so much I'm afraid I'll go off. The only thing stopping me is orange jumpsuits are not my style, and my hair would look horrible in jail.

But people with no goals and accomplishments in life DO get off on putting on a show for BW. It's the highlight of their days. Happy people are to happy living their lives to make crap up like they're on some reality show and the producers need filler to make it seem more entertaining than it really is.

Mary said...

"Just a question? What are bw expected to do as far as other race women and their mr-child(ren) are concern?"

nothing, absolutely nothing. i'm so tired of bw trying to save everybody but themselves, it is not our responsibility to save anybody. those women on maury that stood up and were yelling, they did nothing but make themselves look bad. women are not supposed to be fighting battles on other people's behalves, seriously bw need to stop with this mentality

cool_splash1 said...

And these cats wants people to call them "real men"? It's funny we're talking about this because yesterday I saw a BM/WW couple arguing, the guy was BEGGING the woman to sit and talk, BEGGING like his life depended on it!! If he was paid a dollar everytime he said "PLEASE" he'd be a billionnaire. You could tell the problem wasn't that serious (not serious enough for him to beg her) and she was just playing him. You could tell she dominated him. But had that been a BW being pissed, this guy would have publicly "HANDLED HER".


What's so funny is that the reason bm claim to go/marry ww is because they are supposedly docile and will let a man walk all over her. I'm sorry, but most ww I know married to bm are nothing like that. They hold their own like any woman who is being disrespected. I think that's something bm had to find out if we know. That's a myth they keep flinging around, because 1.) They know that many haven't seen bm/ww together as in long enough to see this and 2.) We will believe these men because for some reason many want to defend their asses.

Anonymous said...

@ cool_splash1 LOL...do ww know how to handle their own? Remember, Hillary kicked $ss doing her run for President and she would have wiped the floor with Sarah. There are men who are scare of Hillary. Even Bill said, "Oh, Hillary can hold her own". The Republicans were smart to wait until Obama made his choice known publicly.

Aphrodite said...

:)

Hi A.F.

The whole thing was just creepy. It enrages me every time I think about.

I mean he didn't lay a hand on me and yet I felt like he might as well have.


I was kind of floored that this guy would be so whatever he was being towards a female and a female that was so much younger than him.

I guess I was expecting for him to be more mature and have some boundaries.


TC that sounds like one heck of a time. It is definitely not ok for someone to touch you. And that is some nerve to get po'd that you tell them to back off. I hope this trend stops soon.

Anonymous said...

American females have more choices whereas some of the females in third world type of countries do not have much a choice. With all its problems God still blesses America.

Do you have some issues with the word "women"?

Anonymous said...

I too dislike the use of the word female instead of women...it sounds horrible..and is one of the "classic" ways that DBR bm refer to women...almost as if they are afraid of the word women..it is quite debasing actually...to be referred to that way...

as for a.f....the original commenter...she is a regular..and I am quite certain she is a lovely black woman..she may not realize how horrible it sounds..sometimes we can be so used to hearing things, we begin to think of them as normal and correct...ths is one of those examples.
I hope that no women here refers to women in general that way..There is nothing inherently wrong with the word..you just have to use it in the proper context....

It is always best to say the OPPOSITE of whatever a DBRbm says..this way you are usually correct..lol

JaliliMaster said...

"Anonymous said...
@Jailmaster, lets be more specific in London most of those men originated from Africa and not the U.S."

And actually, if you're black, then I'm pretty sure you originated from Africa as well, so what is your point? That black men aren't to blame when they pass diseases onto other people? If a black guy does screwed up ish, I'll call 'em out, I couldn't give a rat's behind where said black guy was from. Any black male(or any other race actually) that does nonsense like that, knowing they are passing on an incurable disease) is no good in my book, irrespective of which country they come from. Still a negro to me, doing n****rish kinda crap!

But keep on making excuses, I know, I know, the brothers are 'coming home', give 'em a break, give a brother a chance, they are a different type of 'brother', gee whizz he is from africa, so don't blame a black man for what a black man does if he is from some other country, blah freakin' blah! Um, sorry, what was your point again?

JaliliMaster said...

“lola said...
I believe most of these baby girls are abandonned by their racist fathers and mothers because these little girls represent the "black female" that they hate so much. DBRww hate BW just as much as DBRbm, they don't wanna raise the "mule of the earth", the "lowest human ever" (in their eyes). But the boys, OH THE BOYS are the "kings", the future "epitomy of masculinity". This is pretty much like those girls in most countries who are considered BURDENS to families while boys are considered BLESSINGS. I'm so frustrated and sad!”

I was on a black website(bossip) some months ago. A white chick came on and decided to announce to all of us how black chicks are this and that, we are all jealous of her, she is engaged to a ‘handsome’ black guy(can’t confirm whether he is as she didn’t post a pic). I think she said he was some sort of an engineer, and had a well paid job. I thought, ‘fair enough’, now whatever. She started insulting black women in every way she knew. What was funny was that not a single black guy on the site, not even one, piped up to tell her she was being offensive, only the women told her to go away. Yet anytime someone posts anything remotely negative about bm, several bw on the site would leap to their defence, even if it was a bw telling of her negative experience with a bm.

This ww poster then started to insult her fiance’s mother, saying how she was ugly, and his sisters were aggressive etc. Still, no bm spoke up. This silly girl then started to rant that she really hopes they don’t have any girls, as she ‘can’t stand black girls’, and she only wanted boys. Then and only then did a lone bm poster inquire of her what she would do in the event that she had a biracial girl with her black fiancĂ©. She ten said that she wouldn’t be pleased, but she would be okay since there would be nothing she could do, but would ‘really hate it’ if they ended up looking like any of the women in her husband-to-be’s family. It seems that her reply was ok for the bm who had asked her. I’m sure that this girl would be smiling in her future MIL’s and sister-in-law’s faces, the women being none the wiser that this girl insulted them online.

JaliliMaster said...

"Sky, me too. I'm focusing on the Alejandro's, Chin Dao Lee's and Richard's of the world."

Lol, I thought I'd seen every variation of these names. Thomas/Andrew/Brandon/Bo/Beau/Baron/Chester, Serjio/Luiz/Jesu/Ignacio/Hector & Lee Ming/Tao Ming.

For girls......Becky/Annabel/Emily/Amy, Rosa/Guadalupe/Rosario, Ming Lee/Xao Min/Ching Zu. Lol

JaliliMaster said...

“Velvet Queen said...
I’ve noticed that many black men with white girlfriends, or wives could be walking arm-in-arm with them but the moment an attractive black woman comes by they have to stare her down. I’m not sure if this is a stare out of malice or lust (or both) but it sure happens a lot.”

I have to disagree with the posters who say it’s lust. It can be, but in most cases, it’s malice. These bm would only be lusting after the kind of bw that they’d have dated/slept with, not just any black woman they encounter. It was a very common thing for bw to say these bm who had non-black girlfriends/wives, secretly wanted them. It was only to make themselves feel better. That’s why it was not uncommon(I don’t know if it’s still the smae today), to see a bm who thought he was above bw and would only date ww, hw or aw etc. The moment an attractive bw came along, he’d cheat with her(but never date, almost always going back to the non-black wife). The issue with these men is that they never could manage to get the ‘hot’ black chick, and couldn’t get the ‘hot’ white or other race chick either. However, it seems that there are alot of bw, who would be willing to put out for a bm who they otherwise wouldn’t date if it meant ‘bringing him back home’. These bm knew this so would use these women. Nowadays, most bw have come to the realisation that it ain’t ever happening. Believe me, in most cases, it’s just malice. They want you to get angry, and then get angry at you if you don’t! They seem to have passed this same behaviour onto their non-black partners as well.

JaliliMaster said...

“Velvet Queen said...
Makes me wonder what these types of black men think black women are for.”

Booty call, and also to make their non-black partners jealous. These men believe, deep down, that they are less than. You can bring the most run-down, trailer trash, unattractive, sloppy, no-good-piece-of-junk of a white woman, no man would look at her twice, even her fellow trailer trash white guy. But you know and she knows that she can get a black guy. Even a relatively decent one(i.e job, looks etc.). The bm would tell himself she is a catch, even thought she most obviously isn’t. He knows she probably couldn’t get a white guy with the sort of person she is and combined with the fact that she’s dating a bm. However, he knows that she could still get another self-hating bm. So he needs something to ‘hoick’ her in. That’s where black women come in. As far as he can let her believe that there are hordes of bw(and let’s be honest, up till today, there still are), who would be willing to take him off her hands, he can keep her on her feet. That’s why they try to get a reaction from you. To convince their white girlfriends that they are a catch, and for these non-black women to believe that this otherwise average bm is, atleast in the black community, a catch. She can tell herself that she ‘got one of the “good ones”’.

JaliliMaster said...

“Velvet Queen said...
“I really wonder how white women feel about those sorts of situations. They have children with black men…but it’s such a rough ride. As if they have to fight to keep them in one place. It’s sad actually. And when black men DO leave them, so many white women take it out on their children…as if a child was going to keep a damaged man put in the first place.”

Ok, not just ww do that. It is not uncommon in the black community, where women take their anger out on the children because they are angry at the father of the child who left them, is refusing to pay child support etc. Let’s not pretend that only white women do that ish.

JaliliMaster said...

“Just a question? What are bw expected to do as far as other race women and their mr-child(ren) are concern?”

The only thing bw SHOULD DO is mind their own business! If you suspect that a child’s wellbeing is in danger then you contact the relevant authorities. Otherwise, we should keep our nose out of other people’s business. The only people who would ‘expect’ a bw to get herself involved in issues involving other ‘race’ women and their mr-children are other bw who have an axe to grind. I mean, let’s be honest. If our concern was really about the children, then there is alot of stuff I’d ‘expect’ bw to do concerning black children in black communities, who despite what many would have us believe, are not getting the best treatment when it comes to their OWN FATHERS AND MOTHERS, especially when they happen to be born female. Yes, it is true that on average, you’d probably see a non-black woman treating her half-black sons better than she does her daughters(but this is not universal, I’m sure there are thousands of mixed-race women with non-black mothers that were very nourishing). However, the exact same is true amongst black women. They(I say ‘they’ not ‘we’ because I’m talking about black mothers, of which I’m not one yet), tend to treat their sons more favourably than their daughters and make many more allowances for them. Most women are this way, irrespective of race.

But in the black community, it has gone too far. You’d say a mother make all sorts of excuses for her adult son, even up to and beyond the point he enters jail, get’s a girl pregnant etc., saying he is her baby, etc, allowing this fool to sleep on her couch(if she has no room for him), yet the moment this same woman’s daughter hit’s 16, SIXTEEN, she practically throws her out, expects her to get a man, start contributing financially to the household, etc. A good majority of these women lived somewhat miserable lives, and never had much happiness, or love. They begrudge anyone who has, ESPECIALLY if it is a fellow black woman. Hence the reason why you’d see someone say of their daughter ‘she think she better than us’ because the girl fell in love with someone(especially if the man she fell in love with is not black). Even if he is black, but he is a decent person, unlike the girl’s father who abandoned her mother, some of these mothers would actually get jealous of their daughters. It has become quite disturbing! In most ‘races’, when the child is dating ir, it is usually the parent of the opposite sex that is most opposed to it, ie, when a ww is dating a non-bm, the white father is usually more upset while the mother tends to be a bit more supportive, for a bm or wm, mother is more upset father is usually more supportive(although it is a different dynamic) etc. In the case of black women, both parents tend to be opposed. And due to the fact that a good many of these bw grew up without a stable father figure in their lives, the mother is usually the only parent. It’s annoyin because in the case of her son marrying ir, her annoyance usually has more to do with her anger at other bm that did so in her younger years, and now her son has done it as well. In the case of her daughter marrying ir, she would try to convince the girl that the guy is only using her. The moment they marry, her opposition to the relationship stems more from the fact that she is now seeing this girl whose father abandoned her, have her own shot at love and happiness. It seems the fact that this girl is her own daughter takes a backseat. These are the same type of bw who would insult other bw who are supportive when their daughters fall in love witha man of a different race.

JaliliMaster said...

"BM STILL marry BW and run around on the DL, which causes a rise in HIV cases among married BW.
Many WW hadn't gotten this memo yet."

No, no. They think they get the 'good ones'.

JaliliMaster said...

Mary said...
"Just a question? What are bw expected to do as far as other race women and their mr-child(ren) are concern?"

nothing, absolutely nothing. i'm so tired of bw trying to save everybody but themselves, it is not our responsibility to save anybody. those women on maury that stood up and were yelling, they did nothing but make themselves look bad. women are not supposed to be fighting battles on other people's behalves, seriously bw need to stop with this mentality

I agree. Those women were not realy that angry that she had called her husband a n****r. In any other situation, they’d have been like ‘ha, gotcha, that’s what u get for marrying becky’. The fact that the couple had mr-children gae the bw in the audience that started yelling an extra excuse to excercise their real anger(that he had married this ww in the first place). How can they be trying to fight on behalf of a ‘man’, because of an insult said to him by HIS OWN WIFE. It was not in their place to do that an they only embarrassed themselves on t.v.!

Anonymous said...

Dear Annonymous, I respect your opinion; but, that is your opinion about the word "female". However, I know for a fact that most men will say, "woman" rather than "female"...you women, woman this, and woman that.
However, we should not get so caught up in words. I know I am a woman. Big deal if someone should call me a female. LOL...the last time I looked I was a female.

Peace

dee said...

A close friend of mine, I'll call her "Fay", and her hubby (who is white) have a lovely little girl, Rose, who is now about 5 months old. The only thing that's irritating is that he calls his beautiful little flower (of all names), monkey. For a man who is married to a beautiful black woman and has a child with her and has black friends, you'd think he should know better, but doesn't. He and friends laugh at this like this hilarious. I don't laugh at it, I either get up and walk away or ignore him! She doesn't defend her or tell him to stop.

When she was first born, he was asking people does she look either black or white. The total nerve, this should have been discussed before even thinking about having children. No one has told him to stop, I feel the need to tell him to cut it out, but I don't want to end my friendship (even though it's already rocky) over this. I love the fact that he picked out a pet name for her, but he needs to pick out a different one, the last she needs is the wrong person calling her "monkey".

What I'm trying to say is, that it's not just white women that do this, so do white men. Better yet, anyone non-black/white parent will probably do this and think it's okay.

Golden Silence said...

I hate the use of "female" as well. It's so base. That one guy on YouTube (one of the many Negroes that think they speak for Black women) was giving advice on "how to step to a female" (his words, not mine) and I had to respond to that. It's so tacky and condescending.

I hate to derail this off-topic, but I had no clue where to put this. Does anyone feel that some Black people, who don't have much going on for themselves, use a tactic of what I call "false familiarity," where they automatically assume anyone who's Black will be "down" with them? Let me explain.

I walked past this guy with dreadlocks and some woman at the train station this evening going home, and made nothing of it. Soon this guy ran past me quickly as I was further into the station, then stops. I once again ignored him. I walk to the first car like I always do, and out of nowhere this guy and a few of his women friends rush to sit around me (the fool sits directly next to me), and start talking loudly and obnoxiously. That fool must've known I didn't want him around me, because he gets up seconds later to move to the seat in front of me. I don't know what about me made these people automatically think I'd be interested in them and their loud behavior. I know they wouldn't rush to sit around White folks acting like that, nor have I noticed this happening in other races. The moment the train was at a smooth point in the ride, I got up and walked to another seat with my MP3 player on and a book to read, where the clowns became background noise, then they eventually got off the train. Shaking my head.

Another instance is when I was waiting for a train to work one day, and there was this woman talking loudly on her phone---baby drama, court dates, STD's, the stuff you don't talk about in public. I moved further down so I could be in a different car away from her mess, and when I thought I was safe she followed me into that car! It was like this woman was so desperate for me to pay her attention! Sad!

I am a person who judges people by their character. I'm not going to automatically hang out with someone because they're Black. I do have many great friends who are Black, but they are also people of good character. Why do the Black people with nothing going on for themselves think they can be loud, obnoxious, crude and vulgar, and think I'll accept them with open arms because we're the same race? Why do they gravitate towards me with a magnetic force?

I care about my appearance and how I carry myself, I dress nicely, speak eloquently, and don't act like a hoodrat. I don't get why these people with no class gravitate me. I just don't.

I don't know if I explained myself correctly with my stories (if I didn't I can try to clarify again), but does anyone else find themselves in a situation like that where the wrong types of Black people try to hang around you simply because they assume a false familiarity? I hope I didn't put my foot in my mouth!

Anonymous said...

What dbrbm says female. Men usually say WOMEN. Get your facts straight and _itches about every little thing.

sheila e

TC said...

Golden Silence, what you said about familiarity is true. Trashy people like to claim we're all in the same boat, in essence, trying to to take credit for those striving towards greatness. In truth, we're all in the same boat, but while some of us are paddling as fast as we can, others are just along for the ride.

As for the train issue---Your best bet is to become acquianted with the nicer people you ride with. My shifts don't always allow for this (which is when I get pestered), but when it does, it's nice riding with a group. We share stories, laugh, and because there's several of us, the scary people can't get too close. Are there other women who ride with you? Better yet, are there any nice looking eligible, compatable men? I don't have any on my train (and I've tried all 4 cars, LOL!), but if there's a nice looking man around, see about making a conversation with him. I'm a bit bold, so I went up to one guy, saying we'd seen each other too much not be properly introduced. While he's not one of my "core riders," if my friends didn't work that day I'll sit with him. We're not compatible, but at least now I know instead of wondering about it from afar.

Velvet Queen said...

“dee said...
A close friend of mine, I'll call her "Fay", and her hubby (who is white) have a lovely little girl, Rose, who is now about 5 months old. The only thing that's irritating is that he calls his beautiful little flower (of all names), monkey. For a man who is married to a beautiful black woman and has a child with her and has black friends, you'd think he should know better, but doesn't. He and friends laugh at this like this hilarious. I don't laugh at it, I either get up and walk away or ignore him! She doesn't defend her or tell him to stop.”

I had to comment on this one because my mother (who’s not black) would call my rambunctious baby sister a lil “monkey”. It stopped after my dad eventually got on her case about it but she didn’t see what the big deal was. I don’t think she does yet either, ha ha!
The way I see it is, if it wasn’t for the racial slur the term “monkey” has been used for historically, I think it would be a pretty affectionate way to refer to a rambunctious child (not saying his daughter is rambunctious because I don’t know). Many parents (who aren’t black) call their own kids monkeys, and some don’t see it as a big deal to call a black kid a monkey. I’ve noticed a lot of people (in my area of living) don’t even know about the racial history behind the slur “monkey” so I don’t blame them.
However, my mother had to be reminded but she thinks its not a big deal since we don’t live in those times (as it were then) anymore. But out of respect she doesn’t call my baby sister a lil monkey anymore. I think.
So maybe that’s kind’ve how her father thinks. He isn’t using the term “monkey” in a racist way, although others might but he’s not coming from that point of view. Although I still think there should be some sensitivity. But, she’s not my kid…so…not my call to say what’s right or not in this situation.

Anonymous said...

@dee

that wm prolly wouldve called her that if she looked white too. white people dont see the big deal with stuff like this because theyve never experienced racism in the way black people do. if the mother doesnt say anything it means she knows for sure he doesnt mean anything bad at all, otherwise she surely would have stepped in and pointed it out to him, or more than that. when your in irr you have to have some patience with stuff like this or slowly (not abrutly) try to change it. this comes with the mom and dad being from such different backgrounds.

Velvet Queen said...

JaliliMaster said...
“Velvet Queen said...
“I really wonder how white women feel about those sorts of situations. They have children with black men…but it’s such a rough ride. As if they have to fight to keep them in one place. It’s sad actually. And when black men DO leave them, so many white women take it out on their children…as if a child was going to keep a damaged man put in the first place.”

Ok, not just ww do that. It is not uncommon in the black community, where women take their anger out on the children because they are angry at the father of the child who left them, is refusing to pay child support etc. Let’s not pretend that only white women do that ish.”
~

Oh, I know that and its sickening if you ask me. But I was talking about white women not black women. Sadly, some women in general take their anger out on their children because of a wandering man… but I was talking about white women.
~




“JaliliMaster said...

Booty call, and also to make their non-black partners jealous. These men believe, deep down, that they are less than. You can bring the most run-down, trailer trash, unattractive, sloppy, no-good-piece-of-junk of a white woman, no man would look at her twice, even her fellow trailer trash white guy. But you know and she knows that she can get a black guy. Even a relatively decent one(i.e job, looks etc.). The bm would tell himself she is a catch, even thought she most obviously isn’t. He knows she probably couldn’t get a white guy with the sort of person she is and combined with the fact that she’s dating a bm. However, he knows that she could still get another self-hating bm. So he needs something to ‘hoick’ her in. That’s where black women come in. As far as he can let her believe that there are hordes of bw(and let’s be honest, up till today, there still are), who would be willing to take him off her hands, he can keep her on her feet. That’s why they try to get a reaction from you. To convince their white girlfriends that they are a catch, and for these non-black women to believe that this otherwise average bm is, atleast in the black community, a catch. She can tell herself that she ‘got one of the “good ones”’.”
~

This has always cracked me up. Clearly both that black man, and white woman are very delusional. It’s only understandable that they do delusional things. But I think those types are perfect for each other.
~

JaliliMaster said...

“I have to disagree with the posters who say it’s lust. It can be, but in most cases, it’s malice. These bm would only be lusting after the kind of bw that they’d have dated/slept with, not just any black woman they encounter. It was a very common thing for bw to say these bm who had non-black girlfriends/wives, secretly wanted them. It was only to make themselves feel better.”
~

I don’t think a man should be staring a woman down like that period to begin with (especially if he already has a woman). If its mostly malice, then there are oodles of black men who need to get deliverance…or at least therapy. As for them seemingly only to do so to “black women” (generally speaking) then they have serious issues. But what about the many black women who are beaten, AND raped? (And the numbers have drastically risen for some reason). Quite frankly, evil stares like that are capable of anything, absolutely anything. That’s why I said malice or lust (or both). It’s hateful. Not all black men are like this, I know that… but it’s seems like too many of them are. Much too many. I don’t mind the “check her out” looks (most of the time) but I’m sure a woman can tell by instinct when the look is just not right if she’s paying attention or is properly educated concerning those types of situations.

dee said...

@ Anon and Velvet Queen

I guess I'm being a bit too sensitive about it. Eventually it got me real bad, it's just that I'm seeing through my point of view only and not his POV. My cousin heard him say it, and she got offended, well most of my folks. Guess that's how I got riled up. I'm usually an open minded person, but even little things like that still get me sometimes.

Thanks for your inputs, I'll keep an open mind about it.

Golden Silence said...

tc, I rarely ever see the same people on a regular basis during my commute (DC is a decent-sized city, and add in the suburbanites you have a lot of people commuting), but thanks for the advice.

The only time I don't have too much of an issue with idiots trying to come around me is when I'm with a family member or group of friends, but mostly it's me traveling solo. I'm sick of being a magnet for idiots and scrubs!

Sandra77 said...

In my experience, black men and boys sometimes refer to black women/girls as "females" when they are viewing them as things (i.e., playthings), as something to be "acted upon" by them, when they wish to deny the humanity of black women/girls. This is not always the case, but I see and hear this enough to know that this is often the case.

Anonymous said...

I am the Anon who mentioned that I dislike the use of the word female instead of using the word "women."

I think a few people understood what I was getting at (like Sandra77)..and a few more undoubtedly. This is not a personal attack on a.f....not at all...

I still stand by my original statement of course. Any man who talks about "females" is an ignorant fella..and to be avoided at all costs. As I said before, there is nothing wrong with the word female....it just has to be used in the proper context...and I am sorry, but you are wrong when you say that most men (bm I assume) refer to women as women..I hear them use the word female all the time...it comes from a studious and abject ignorance of HOW to use words in the English Language.

Please never fool yourself into thinking it is acceptable...it is not.

Aphrodite said...

"yet the moment this same woman’s daughter hit’s 16, SIXTEEN, she practically throws her out, expects her to get a man, start contributing financially to the household, etc. A good majority of these women lived somewhat miserable lives, and never had much happiness, or love. They begrudge anyone who has, ESPECIALLY if it is a fellow black woman."




JMaster you know. You have spoken the truth.



Golden Silence the odd thing is that I tend to be alienated/targeted by those kinds of black people. They don't rush to me- they shun me. Not that I seek them, but in the past I had to work with some of them.



"Quite frankly, evil stares like that are capable of anything, absolutely anything."


Velvet Queen, you articulated what I couldn't.

Miriam said...

What sad stories. Its not easy being a mom. You basically have to put your own life on "slow down" mode and be self-less for a bit. Not something a selfish person can do.

Also, as a black mom to bi-racial kids, I am glad to BE the mom, because the mom is the one who thinks 'okay, the kids need x to have self esteem, and exposure to y to see things clearly, etc'-- At a very young age!

Guys don't USUALLY think like this especially when the child is very young -too young to ask questions or show where she's holding esteem wise.

I fear many WW moms may not even have a clue as to how to raise, seekout, speak about, and expose their children to the beauty that is part of the black "race".

Phantom Mare said...

In my experience, black men and boys sometimes refer to black women/girls as "females" when they are viewing them as things (i.e., playthings), as something to be "acted upon" by them, when they wish to deny the humanity of black women/girls. This is not always the case, but I see and hear this enough to know that this is often the case.

_________________________

That's kind of how I thought it was.

We are all female, but not all females are women.

Female what?

Dog?
Cat?
Chicken?
Pig?

Wo-Man denotes what kind of "female" you speak of.
A Hue-Man(for we are many) that has a womb.

You can look and dress like a female. Verses looking and dressing like a woman.

You can act female verses acting like a woman(in the sense of being a lady).

I think we can all use 'female' at times but there is a certain -usage- of the word female that *can* be viewed as negative.

Anonymous said...

"I fear many WW moms may not even have a clue as to how to raise, seekout, speak about, and expose their children to the beauty that is part of the black "race"".

And, this is why they should think before having a bi-racial child. When I had my son I wasn't given any sympathy. Just do the best you can to raise YOUR CHILD to be the BEST HUMAN BEING possible.
End of story.

Anonymous said...

"Yet, the moment this same woman’s daughter hit’s 16, she is practically thrown out, expected her to get a man, start contributing financially to the household, etc. A good majority of these women lived somewhat miserable lives, and never had much happiness, or love. They begrudge anyone who has, ESPECIALLY if it is a fellow black woman."

I agree. Most of us take this type of position when it comes to our young daughters and this type of behavior needs to stop.

Yes, most of us expect the teen girl to act as if she is a woman and at the same time most of us will cuddle our sons.

I think most of the sons are so used to being cuddled that they do not realize or care that there is a difference between the way most of us are raising our sons and daughters.

This is America WE CAN DO BETTER.

a.f.

Anonymous said...

@ anony. 6:25pm...My Dear we will have to agree to disagree and lets move on.

Have a nice day.

a.f.

sky said...

real quick new vide of beyonce. looks like she got the message to.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwORr1ys-mk

Velvet Queen said...

“Selena

I noticed this when ww are with their white husbands/bfs. I think its all about ww just being down right insecure period!

Whenever I'm out and about and a wm and his ww girlfriend/wife are approaching me, the ww instantly will grab his hand or place her arm around him or some other form of pda. Keep in mind it does nothing to stop the wm from staring LOL. I used to dart my glancess away but now I stare/flirt right back. BTW it seems like the looks and flirting is getting bolder and bolder from wm...”

~

Ha, ha, ha! I’ve been hearing a lot about situations like that lately. I had one experience with a white man, and Asian girlfriend/wife (not sure which) who just kept staring at me until I figured I’d just look him in the eyes and give him a good flirtatious look! I don’t think his woman noticed, she was to busy at the cashier, ha ha! But maybe I shouldn’t have done that cause he still didn’t stop staring! Ha ha ha!!!

~

“energize said...
And if the ww knows her bm is attracted to you, she may suddenly want to be your pal.”
~

I had a similar situation once, but it had to do with her interests in another white male who openly voiced his attraction to me. We weren’t “kindred” spirits but all of a sudden she wanted to talk me, and hang out. If I hadn’t have gone thru similar situations before I would’ve been completely blind to it but I wasn’t. After a while she wouldn’t really talk to me any more.

cool_splash1 said...

"Sky, me too. I'm focusing on the Alejandro's, Chin Dao Lee's and Richard's of the world."

Lol, I thought I'd seen every variation of these names. Thomas/Andrew/Brandon/Bo/Beau/Baron/Chester, Serjio/Luiz/Jesu/Ignacio/Hector & Lee Ming/Tao Ming.


Hey you look for the Alejandro's and I'll be checking out the Sikanders.lol

Anonymous said...

off topic but you gotta check this out


http://blackandmissing.blogspot.com/2008/10/judilianna-lawrence-raped-gagged.html

young bw met a soldier on myspace he tortures and kills her .This is the killers myspace page ,his writings should have been a warning that he was dbr, all women no matter who they date should be ON GUARD WHEN MEETING THRU THE INTERNET!!meet in public places ,don't let him know where you live ,let others know who you are meeting and let him know that friends family know you are with him ,it's to dangerous to try to have secret rendezvous with men over the web


http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=56640015




Bougie

Taylor-Sara said...

Bougie thank you for that tip, you may have just saved someone's life!
Ladies, please heed that warning. It is extremely dangerous to have secret meetings with strangers, Please protect yourselves -SM

energize said...

That was horrible Bougie.

The military will be sending a lot of mentally disturbed soldiers home to families and friends. They offer little medical assistance or monitoring of the long term effects of serving too many tours for a war that has gone on too long and now we are in another war - tragic.

Internet dating feels creepy to me. I know it's the trend and there are success stories, but it just feels so impersonal.

Selena said...

Not to make light of this tragic situation but who was adding the post to his Myspace account?

At Energize,

Yes and the deployments are getting worst. Its not uncommon to see units getting no more than nine months break between each rotation.

starkitty50 said...

That is truly scary. But according to the story, this young woman had learning disabilities, so she could not have been thinking properly to go with this guy. He took advantage of her and lured her into this tragic situation. I feel sorry for her and her family.There need to be more emphasis placed on getting mental help for this young soldiers. Just because some may not have visible scars, it doesn't mean they were not affected. Very sad...

keke said...

starkitty, Am I reading right? He tortured and murdered a young mentally disabled woman, and you felel sorry for him???

I feel like I'm in the twilight zone! Do you feel sorry for the monster who murdered J. Hudson's family too? You know the poor prison imate who ruthlessly gunned down 3 people over a car!!!

starkitty50 said...

Um, no, I said that I feel sorry for the victim and her family. If you had read the last part of my sentence, I was merely stating the need for mental help for these soldiers coming back from the war with mental problems and that just because they may not have visible scars, it does not mean they were not affected. I was talking about soldiers in the general case needing more mental help.How could that be interpreted as having sympathy for a murderer? In no way do I feel sorry for someone who killed an innocent person. I had a cousin who was murdered a year ago, so I DO NOT sympathize with murderers. I don't know how you could have misinterpreted that comment.

Anonymous said...

If this is true, it is a sad sad thing, and i'm sure there are many similar tales. This particualr story though lacks the emotion someone would use to speak of a troubled childhood, and the aspects mentioned are more like fairytale voltas. Don't believe everything you read.

Plus, why so sexist/racist?
"White mothers are the worst"
"Black men always run off"
blah blah blah.
Have you met every white mother?
Have you met every black man?
Why this unintellectual self importance which makes you think you know everything.
To me, you're all americans. Americans with no insight to human behaviour, no racial harmony or forgiveness.
Do you forget that NO MATTER WHAT your gender or race, there are people starving in your motherlands. And whilst you sit and bitch, 'white mothers' or 'black men' spend their lives helping them, millions of miles from your society where you seem to think the cure for evil is retaliation.

Everyone is different, but DO NOT CONSIDER OTHERS AS INFERIOR.
This makes you a bad person.

A black mother is no better than a white one if she destroys the love in her children that they could have shared with everyone.