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Sunday, September 20, 2009

How ww are upheld, coveted, and protected...


This is but a sample of what happened after the VMA's. Now I know you have all heard about the remarks Kanye made to Taylor Swift. It seemed to cause a national uproar. I thought his interruption, and remarks were trademarks of his arrogant nature. But that aside, besides being rude, I certainly didn't find it so newsworthy that the President should have been talking about it! For those of you who don't know, Pres. Barack actually called Kanya a jackass for the remarks! Now I'm just wondering. But is this the same President who has nothing about the bw being raped, mutilated, and murdered in the Congo? Is this the same President who remained mute when Pastor jerk-off called his wife ugly, and his momma a hoe? I'm just wondering because I have a really hard time holding my tongue at times, as y'all already know that. But I just cannot understand for the life of me why he would concern himself with kanye being rude to a pretty white teenager, yet have nothing to say about issues that that soooooo much more relevant? Like Hovey Street, Dunbar Village, Congo, bw street harassment, the Mayor who insists on shutting down low income daycare centers so that mothers who are single parents are losing their jobs due to lack of adequate daycare etc, etc, etc! BTW, Zabeth, I definitely owe you an apology about the President girl- You were right, and I was wrong! (you know what I'm talking about...)
Why is a pretty white girl attracting national attention over a silly remark by an arrogant man? This is exactly what I mean when I say ww are on a pedestal. Now don't get me wrong. Since I'm a country music fan, I've been aware of TS probably before many of you. And I like her. She's sweet, and a good (not great) singer, and has a big heart. I definitely felt Kanye should have apologized. But I don't think his career should have been (and possible still is ) in jeopardy over that silly remark. Everyone was talking about it! I turned to 10 stations the night it happened and it was on all of them! People were demanding that he be banned, and boycotted, and everyone was coming to her rescue! You would have thought he walked up to her and slapped her the way ppl reacted! This is ww on the pedestal Ladies-in case you wondered what it looked like in action. Remember when Don Imus (who looks like a horse) called the girls basketball team of bw, nappy headed, ugly hoes? Did you see even 1/10 as much anger as you did when one ww was insulted? Remember when stupid ass DL hughley agreed with him, and said on national tv, "Well... yeah, they was some ugly ass women!" Remember how angry bw were and demanded that he apologize. Remember how he blatantly refused-and yet his career went on. Remember the ignorant Wayans brother also calling bw names including the first lady whom he addressed as an " ugly dark woman" did you hear a fervor over that? Did you see anyone rushing to end his career or make him take it back?
Then think about Dr Dre. This man took issue with a bw reporter having an interview with Ice cube. (who had left NWA on a sour note) He and his posse of woman-beaters apparently felt that this reporter had no business giving their (now enemy) an interview. They were also angry about the tone of the interview, and the things she 'allowed' this grown man to say. When Dr Dre saw her at an after hours party weeks later. He promptly commenced to jump on this young lady like she was a man and beat her up and down the hall! He kicked, punched, and stomped this girl, and even tried to throw her down the steps! NO ONE CAME TO HER DEFENSE -INCL. HIS CREW WHO STOOD ON THE SIDELINE, AND CHEERED HIM ON! She got away at one point, and ran into the ladies bathroom, but he stormed in and proceeded to pound her head into the concrete wall! She barely escaped with her life, and yet very little was heard of the horrendous attack on a woman by a man twice her size!!! His crew said repeatedly afterwards "B--ch got what she deserved! " This is the way bw are treated- hardly a peep from anyone, yet EVERYONE seems to be up in arms because a wg was rudely treated at an awards show! Dr Dre later had to pay an undisclosed amount of money yet, never apologized or showed any remorse, and his undeserved career went on!!!
Yet you can best believe Kanye KNEW his career was in jeopardy if he didn't take his remarks back about the wg!
Even Taylor herself has said: "I was shocked at how many people had my back! I got letters, phone calls, emails etc full of support-I couldn't believe how many people were looking out for me!"
I'm not really surprised so many people were looking out for her. After all she's a young Becky in America. That's something that's always held in high esteem, and protected. But in her case she's also famous, rich (or soon will be) and has a definite vulnerability to her persona. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I think ww should not be protected, because that is NOT what I am saying at all. I merely think that the protection and pedestal should extend to ALL women be they Hispanic, Asian, Native American, Black etc. I don't think it should only make National news when a ww is missing or insulted. I think the privilege should extend to everyone. I keep wondering what would have happened had he made the remark to Beyonce about Taylor instead of the other way around. Do you think there would be half this much anger and uproar???? Think about it.....

164 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sarah. Obama made that statement off the record in direct response to being asked about it. He didn't expect it to be leaked. What President would publicly respond to insults to his family by a Youtube nut? Responding to every personal insult made to him would show a serious character flaw.

Obama is not a President for black women or black people. He has to be President of all Americans.

And there was FAR more outrage at Imus than there is at Kanye.

Taylor-Sara said...

Anon. that's my point. If he was going to respond to nonsense he could have responded to the nutcase talking mess about his wife. He should not have responded to the kanye mess at all! He's the President for God's sake. He should be above an Award Show!....

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I think the President forgets he is the President of the U.S. Mr. President please stop replying to every little issue. In my opinion his comments about Kanye was totally unappropriate for his position.

T.S. is young and she will get pass this odd moment in time. If any thing she is doing very well now and will reap the financial benefits...thanks K.W.

Kanye needs to go and talk to a therapist. He needs to get himself some help before he totally self destruct. Think before you act.

BTW...Mr. President needs to make it a permanent law that AA people are citizens of this country. We forgot about that old law- I believe every 25 yrs. the President has to sign a bill stating that AA people are true citizens.

lois

Anonymous said...

@ anon. 7:55 pm

There should have been more outrage at D. Imus. K.W. was being a jerk because he interrupted T.S. K.W. did not call her one nasty name and he did apologized to her while he was on stage.

Also, I watching D.L. that particular night and I simply could not believe he not only repeated the same things Imus
had said; but this idiot was smiling like a stupid @$$ hole in the ground.
Tom Joyner is taking pity on his butt and hired him to do some on hire work and I think Jay may have him doing some work also. The guy is not that funny.

lois

Amarie said...

Sara said: I keep wondering what would have happened had he made the remark to Beyonce about Taylor instead of the other way around. Do you think there would be half this much anger and uproar????

Amarie said: No, but it would be known all over the world that he got knocked the f*** out by Jay Z. Sorry about the curse word.

Anonymous said...

correction...Tom Joyner is taking pity on his butt and hired him to do some on air work...

Some of these guys are self destructing and do not realize it.

@ Amarie...that last part was LOL funny.

lois

rhonalala said...

Great post! I agree with all the points you made and they are all points! It really makes me think.

Anonymous said...

Wow, Sara, I never really thought about it that way until after reading all of what you wrote. You have really opened up my eyes. It's true people wouldn't get all worked up if it was a BW. When Rihanna got beat up the whole world ridiculed her, when BW are insulted people laugh or just ignore it. It's sad. Even I think the react towards this whole thing is a bit too much.Kanye was a jerk yes, but I think people are getting worked up because Taylor represents what most people in America like to put on a pedestal- an attractive, young, blonde WW.

Faith at Acts of Faith Blog said...

1. Who cares about Kanye? He can deal with the fallout to his career on his own. There will be no knee jerk reactionary come to the rescue of the black man in trouble reaction from me. He doesn't date black women who look anything like his mother so we know what's up with him and who'd he be likely to support.

2. Obama is in control of his mouth as well. Why are ppl trying to claim someone did him wrong by revealing what he said?

3. Beyonce is married to a thug with at least one out of wedlock child so I'm sure she can take care of herself. She isn't exactly empowering to black women either.

Faith at Acts of Faith Blog said...

Oh yeah I forgot to add - black women are not going to be put on a pedestal like white and asian women are until black men value us. Since that's NOT happening ever we have to look elsewhere to be embraced and cherished. I still think that protection will be based on an individual basis but as for the collective - it's over.

Taylor-Sara said...

I agree faith. I don't care about KW either. What I care about is that bw never garner this knee jerk type of protection! Dr Dre beat this poor young woman into a stupor, and hardly anything was said, yet a wg who's slighted is worthy of national news! THIS is what I have a problem with, it's not about KW at all. I care about the lives of BW....

sky said...

I don't think people got overly angery at KW because of TS, I think it had a lot to do w/ the fact that he has pulled this stunt before, and this was before his mother died. KW has this attitude of being self-centered and things must go his way or no way. Everything is about him. He always get worked up on the MTV awards about how he doesn't win the moonman and when he did he gave it to another rap group(forgot their name but they did the song "hey ya'll" and "I'm sorry ms. jackson"). Let's not forget that 50 Cent himself pulled a stunt like this at the grammy's when Evanesence won for best new artist/album instead of him. I think this anger was way before TS incident. Before it was KW being KW, but after that night, her first win, the 1st country star to get nominated at the MTV awards, her 1st moment taken, that's where the anger comes in. In my opinion he would have gone up there anyway even if it wasn't TS, because in his mind Beyonce should have won. I would have loved to see if he had done that to Pink, it would have been a rap!

Now w/ the Don Imus situation in my opinion there was more anger towards that than this. Don Imus went on for weeks, w/ national news, articles, YT discussions. It was 2x's worse than this. Hell they even had him removed from radio. The TS incident died last week after his apology on Jay Leno.

I would like to see the same exact anger if it were a bw/hw/aw. But the way the BC is, I don't think that's going to happen. The BC is primarily concerned w/ BM. Like someone said b4 w/ the Rihanna incident everyone was making excuses for CB as far as the BC, everyone else knew what was up. I saw more support for Rhi from the outside community than w/in. I remember having a debate w/ a classmate of mine about what had happened and all she kept saying was "well we don't know what happened", I argued back saying "he beat the sh*t out of her, he's 6'1'', twice her size, what else do you need to know?". she couldn't even answer. the BC itself is in an abusive relationships and continues to stay there because they believe that's how it should be. So I no longer care what the BC thinks, they don't value women and children, therefore I don't value their opinion.

Anonymous said...

"I still think that protection will be based on an individual basis but as for the collective - it's over." I relently agree.

I just read this...Update: G-Unit Member Beat Up Woman At 50 Cent's Mansion Over Oral Sex.

http://www.sixshot.com/news/14401/

lois

Lovebug said...

I agree with you 100% Faith. Your comments were very insightful. I don't resent white men or the white community for protecting their women that is what they are supposed to do. Would society be better if they also looked out for black women? Of course. But the fact is women white will always be their priority because these women look like their mothers, daughters, and sisters.

The major problem for black women is that black men do not seem to share this same desire to protect and uplift women that look like their mothers, daughters and sisters. As a result, we are at a disadvantage. On a personal basis a white man might take the initiative to protect a black woman he knows, but I truly don't ever expect this to happen collectively. Because the normal expectation is that Black men/black community will or should take on this role.

It also doesn't help when so many black women appear to be resistant to forming personal relationships (romantic or platonic) with white men. A ridiculous practice in my opinion which only hurts black women collectively. For example, Whoopi Goldberg was good friends with the late Patrick Swayze and stated how it was because of him that she got her Oscar. This is because the producers of Ghost did not want Whoopi for the role, but Patrick used his influence and insisted that she be given the role. This of course led to her eventual nomination and Oscar win.

lormarie said...

I will only disagree on one point. I believe that there was just as much outrage (maybe even a bit more) over the Don Imus incident. Also, just imagine the fallout if it had been a white man who said the same to a black female singer.

I personally don't believe that Kanye is sorry for what he did. Did anyone hear that Jay Z came out in defense of Kanye? I swear bm will go to bat for bm even when they do wrong.

Others may disagree, but I do believe that Beyonce's actions was a plus for bw. People were mentioning how much class she had (even on racist and socially conservative sites). It gave us a nice break from the Serena Williams outburst and the negative attention that followed. Beyonce may not be the best role model for bw but I was so pleased that she did not rush to the defense of a black man. To me, that spoke volumes. Strategically, it is in the best interest of bw to do the same. We can acheive the value that other women have once we stop being race women but simply women. I believe this is true whether or not bm value us.

lormarie said...

For example, Whoopi Goldberg was good friends with the late Patrick Swayze and stated how it was because of him that she got her Oscar. This is because the producers of Ghost did not want Whoopi for the role, but Patrick used his influence and insisted that she be given the role. This of course led to her eventual nomination and Oscar win.--Lovebug

Isn't that something? It seems that a bw is better served by the support of a wm than she is a bm. I'm not saying that we should rush out and champion the white man or white supremacy but facts are facts. A bw is more likely to "get somewhere" if the men in power back you up.

Taylor-Sara said...

loremarie, I agree with some of your assessments. For instance I think Bey acted very classy, and ladylike, and I was proud of her. But BP in general seem to have a 'I'll beat the women in my ethnic group to death, but YOU better not try it!' type mentality. That's the ONLY reason there was ANY flack about Don Imus at all. Had he been black, bm would have cheered (as ignorant as that is) They only wanted blood because he was white, and if it was such a big deal, then how come as soon as it started to blow over, was he given another prominent job without a peep from anyone?
I guess the question we should be asking ourselves is ' how do we engender such protective instincts?' Instead of always having to be the *strong* (hate that word) black woman? I guess what upsets me most is that it's all so hypocritical and fake! Weeks after Snoop went on tv demanding an apology from Imus, he was back in the studio calling bw b*tches and h*es hisself!!! WTH! So don't get upset if a wm disrespects us, if you're going to do the same thing!

S said...

I too was glad that Beyonce showed some class ( for once!) and gave Taylor her moment, and it really was a moment. I was touched anyways and Taylor seemed very touched as well :)
See, if beyonce hadn't done what she did you all know what would have happened...
it's not beyonce's fault that ignorant fool mentioned her name and she looked so shocked and probably was annoyed by that little stunt kanye pulled.
I don't think beyonce is a good role model at all, infact if i had a daughter i would much rather her listen to taylor swifts music and watch taylor swifts music videos then beyonces which i think are so trashy, she is a good dancer and performer, no doubt, but tone it down with the "hoochy" dancing,barely there clothes and weird trashy dance moves. Less is more and that's why i like taylor.

BW need to forget about that "black first, woman second" label.
We are women. Period.
We need to support all women and realize that they (WW) are not our enemies and WE as a collective benefit from being friends with all women or else we will forever be tagged with that "jealous" label.
And yes i do agree that when you have the support of the most powerful men in our society you will go alot further in life.
Why stick with the low class and surround yourself with people who hate you more or less when you can be around positive people who will love you for who you are and most importanly, uplift you?
Do you think whoopi goldberg would be where she is today if she had listened to all the nay sayers and BM who called her various disgusting names trying to break her spirit? I don't think so.

Kanye west is an idiot, we all knew that one! and i loved how the guys from kings of leon who btw are from nashville, rushed to taylors defense and said that kanye west had the worst haircut since 1984 .
I love those country men lol, they will defend their women! as they should.
I'll admit, i'm jealous of the collective protection WW get, even when they are in the worst situations.
That's why i always try to stay on the right side of the law because no one is going to "bail" me out.

Lavette said...

Hi Sara and Hello Everyone!

I miss posting but I started Graduate School so of course I've been busy but I wanted to say hello and to post.

1. KW needs Jesus and he needs to listen to his own song and walk with him too!....LOL!

2. Harry Potter keeps coming to my mind after reading this post because he pointed out the many examples of ww protectionism when his blog was up.

3. I agree will all the points made on this issue and this something that fuel black women to want better for themselves and to get out there and go for what you know is yours and not care what anyone thinks or says. Expect to enemy to try everything in his arsenol (sp?) to stop black women from achieving but we cannot not give up nor give in.

Patrice Rushen had a song on one of her LPs called Giving it up is Givin in.

Blessings to all.

lormarie said...

I too think that the only reason blacks went after Imus was because he's white. There was silence over that DL Hughley.

Taylor-Sara said...

I guess that's it. S. you put it perfectly in a nutshell. I could not put my finger on the feeling I was feeling but you expressed it for me. I'm jealous too. And I hate feeling that way but there it is. I wish we had men who would rush to our rescue like that. I hate the fact that had taylor been black, (I beleive) not much would have been said. Esp. by bm. I don't hate ww at all. I have ww in my family, and love most of them dearly, (except for 1) but I'm jealous that wm will always rush to protect them, and treat them like gems whereas the men in our racial group can only be counted on to jump in and usualy help is someone is hurting us....sad and angry at myself for being jealous...

Red said...

Isn't that something? It seems that a bw is better served by the support of a wm than she is a bm. I'm not saying that we should rush out and champion the white man or white supremacy but facts are facts. A bw is more likely to "get somewhere" if the men in power back you up.

With or without Swayze, a black woman would have had the role since the role was made for a black woman. Swayze’s influence, while being Whoopi’s gain, was Patti LaBelle’s and Jack√©e Harry’s loss (since both auditioned for the role).

Plus, the role is a very stereotypical role. Oda Mae Brown is a loud and crude petty criminal and con artist.

Queen Latifah, Angela Bassett, Janet Jackson, Gabrielle Union, etc. got their first major roles on the big screen as the result of black male directors.

Chi said...

I think Faith's comments were spot on. I'm so over Kanye and this whole mess.

SweetSoulSister said...

S said:
BW need to forget about that "black first, woman second" label.
We are women. Period.
We need to support all women and realize that they (WW) are not our enemies and WE as a collective benefit from being friends with all women or else we will forever be tagged with that "jealous" label."

Response:
While I do agree that we are women first, I do not agree that ww are not enemies. Not once have I ever seen ww speak out against the treatment of black women. In fact, most of them laugh at it. I don't believe some INDIVIDUAL ww are the enemy but the collective? Yes. In fact, most bw are the enemy to other bw as well because they are constantly defending Miss Anne's virtue. Did anyone send Rhianna flowers when that waste of skin kicked her ***? Not that we know of and the person doing the sending certainly would've made a press release about it. Janet Jackson certainly rushed to send Taylor Swift flowers. Where was Taylor Swift when Rhianna got beaten?? She and Carrie Underwood both said "it's none of my business, I'm staying out of it."

Besides, looking out for any other woman's best interest would automatically knock ww off of the pedestal because it would imply other women are entitled to equal treatment and collectively, ww will never give credence to, nor elevate any other woman to her level by acknowledging her femininity/need for protection . In most ways, when it comes to the plight of BW, ww are just as bad and sometimes worse than negro males. I don't trust them collectively (I don't trust anyone collectively, woman/man, black/white). That's not bitterness, jealousy, nor anger. It's real talk from experience with them.

sky said...

S said..."I'll admit, i'm jealous of the collective protection WW get, even when they are in the worst situations.
That's why i always try to stay on the right side of the law because no one is going to "bail" me out."

You pretty much summed it up for us here. Every time I daydreamed about a man, it was about him protecting me and providing for our family. Never in my mind did I think I would have to take care of him, pay the bills, or wear the pants in the relationship. I didn't even know kings of leon came in her defense, I love that group. I know Puerto Rican artist Pitbull came in her defense as well. But I also loved how everyone praised Beyonce. I was very proud of her too. Some even had the nerve to mention that TS ended up taking Beyonce's moment, but how many moments has beyonce made on the MTV stage? That was nothing for Beyonce. It is an act of kindness.

In my opinion I think KW was remorseful but only because his tatic worked against him. He thought BP would rally behind him and demand that Beyonce recieve her award. Instead the whole world basically told him to shut up and get lost. He already started heading down south before walking up that stage carrying a bottle of alcohol(which i think is illegal to do) all over the premiere floor, even sharing it w/ other artist.

But overall I am not mad that they came to TS defense, like ya'll said, that is what you are suppose to do for your women. I don't expect BM to protect BW, they can hardly protect themselves to begin with. I've had wm come to my defense in high school whenever a bm wanted to give me trouble just because I was joking around with the white guys in my class. They(bm) ended up looking stupid. I never understood why they would be upset with me for no reason, but now after all these years I get it.

But I wanted to add this many people do come in the defense of BP, just not AA (no offense) because they have given up on them because of their constant complaining about "da eval white mayn" (who would want to help someone who thinks so evil of them, I sure wouldn't). In my opinion they are more willing to go to Africa/Carribean and help there. I'll be honest if it weren't for George Clooney, I would have never known about Darfur.

Aphrodite said...

"September 20, 2009 9:39 PM
Blogger Faith at Acts of Faith Blog said...

1. Who cares about Kanye? He can deal with the fallout to his career on his own. There will be no knee jerk reactionary come to the rescue of the black man in trouble reaction from me. He doesn't date black women who look anything like his mother so we know what's up with him and who'd he be likely to support."



Co-sign x 1.2 million!



@ Lois

"Kanye needs to go and talk to a therapist. He needs to get himself some help before he totally self destruct. Think before you act."


Lois whatchutalkinbout? Kanye is getting therapy right now! LOL The good white folks is giving him all the therapy he needs and then some. I experience joy when dumb negroes who profit from BW pain, elevate Becky and Miss. Anne's children over his own, and to top it off don't have sense enough to know that they are so out of pocket in how they treat BW - that they actually think they can treat other groups of women the same way.

So he is getting some therapy. He probably won't learn the lesson and see the big picture, but that is his problem.

Aphrodite said...

Congratulations Lavette! Good job!

cool_splash1 said...

Sometimes I think the President forgets he is the President of the U.S. Mr. President please stop replying to every little issue. In my opinion his comments about Kanye was totally unappropriate for his position.


We also have to remember this man aint God he's a man. He's going to have opinions like every other human being out there. And frankly I think that's good that he doesn't get all cocked about comments. If you notice they both ignore the fools

cool_splash1 said...

It also doesn't help when so many black women appear to be resistant to forming personal relationships (romantic or platonic) with white men. A ridiculous practice in my opinion which only hurts black women collectively. For example, Whoopi Goldberg was good friends with the late Patrick Swayze and stated how it was because of him that she got her Oscar. This is because the producers of Ghost did not want Whoopi for the role, but Patrick used his influence and insisted that she be given the role. This of course led to her eventual nomination and Oscar win.

Thank you. Finally someone has said what I have been thinking and saying even on my blog. I understand how these bw actresses can't figure out why they are having a hard time getting work. Hell Nichelle Nichols proves this point. G. R. had a crush on her. Most of his girlfriends or even crushes ended up on Star Trek/Other shows he created as guest stars, stars or re-occuring. Same with Star Trek Voyager a whole relationship storyline changed because one of the show/runners/producers was dating the lead actress who played 7 of 9 (which pissed many people off). This goes for directing and other jobs in the film industry or hell any industry.

Aphrodite said...

@ S

"We need to support all women and realize that they (WW) are not our enemies and WE as a collective benefit from being friends with all women or else we will forever be tagged with that "jealous" label."


I don't think we need to support all women or see them friends - at least for me I don't. Especially considering how WW have pimped BW re: feminism just as hard as BM have with civil rights. WW benefit from BW's condition just as much as BM.


I don't hate WW, see them as enemies, nor am I jealous of them, but I prefer some of Rev Lisa's discussions on this matter regarding:

1. vetting/establishing allies vs friends/intimates
2. fostering dependence

Etc..

Evia, Halima, Khadija and others have touched on BW always operating under the assumption of fairness - if I am nice to you - you will automatically be nice to me. That has gotten many of our heads collectively bashed in.


I just think we need to be careful. We have always thrown our support (resources) to other folks and they take it, further their agenda, and keep it moving.

Selena said...

You know what? I'm soooo over it. I'm so over what bm do and don't do for "us". I've never expected nothing more or less from them as a whole.

Its funny that lormarie brought up Beyonce taking the high-road because one celerity blog that shall-remain-nameless (I really believe is ran by bm) had their nerves to say that they believed her actions was publicity driven *SMH*.

However Sara I'm so happy that you give us these brilliant essays because the women who are trying to "keep hope alive" need to read them- especially those that have black sons!!!!!

Aphrodite said...

Hello Sara,


"I guess that's it. S. you put it perfectly in a nutshell. I could not put my finger on the feeling I was feeling but you expressed it for me. I'm jealous too. And I hate feeling that way but there it is. .....but I'm jealous that wm will always rush to protect them, and treat them like gems whereas the men in our racial group can only be counted on to jump in and usualy help is someone is hurting us....sad and angry at myself for being jealous..."


Well you feel what you feel. It is what it is. I don't think you should judge yourself too hard about what you are feeling.

I think it is natural to have some type of feeling about this bc it is so unnatural and painful.

But the whole matter is one to be laid at the feet of BM. The are the epic fail in this whole equation.

Anonymous said...

I wish we had men who would rush to our rescue like that.

Is that not what Kanye did in his own flawed way? Was he not attempting to defend a black woman against what he deemed an injustice? Was he not attempting, albeit in a crude unintelligent way, to have Beyonce's back when she did not receive an award that he felt that she deserved?

While we are using this incident as an example of how white women are supposedly protected and defended, this example actually shows an attempt of a black man to defend a black women that he has no intimate relationship with.

I would say that the spirit of what Kanye was attempting to do is why Jay-Z is defending him, not because Kanye is a black man. Kanye was attempting to have Jay-Z's wife's back.

Zabeth said...

No need to apologize, it’s water under the bridge. We all have our opinions and can sometimes be fervent in our beliefs, I’m guilty of that too. That’s what makes this country and these forums so great. :-) And I wholeheartedly agree, protection and the so called pedestal should be extended to ALL women.

Anonymous said...

I'm a black woman, and I believe that we should support all women regardless and get rid of the ones that don't have our best interests in heart. Not all WW hate black women. We need to stop looking at WW as our enemies and learn how to get along with each other. I'm tired of this BW vs. WW crap. As for me, I go for black women first, and then other women. I'm not going to shut WW out because of bad experiences. We need to stop fighting each other period. It's not their fault that they are this way. Blame it on the racist white supremacy that put them on a pedestal. I believe that we should look out for ourselves first, and then for women of other races. If you keep looking at non-black women as your enemy all the time, we will never get anywhere, and we will never be able to get along and form true sisterhood. We are all women. Yes, black women go through more than other women, but still we can't just view all of them as their enemies. I'm tired of this war between us. Not all non-BW are the same.

Taylor-Sara said...

You know Anon. I understand what you are saying, but I hear very few ppl saying ww are the enemy. What I hear ppl saying is that we need to focus on our own agenda, and let ww focus on theirs. The world after all, will always come to their rescue, yet we have only ourselves. How many ww really give a damn what happens to us? Ask yourself that. Yet we ARE always running to their rescue. Why would Janet send flowers to Taylor but not to Rhianna? Ask yourself that. We cannot afford to dillute our energy, we need to do what ww have done for centuries. Worry about, and take care of US!

Justaguy said...

You all keep saying that the world comes to the rescue of white women and not black women. Where do you get this from? When black men or black women attack white women, nobody cares. Let one black woman make a false rape claim against some young white men or against some NY police officers and there is a national uproar before the truth comes out and the woman will still get her college education paid for. During the Seattle Mardi Gras, black men and some black women went around beating white men and women and the white men either watched or ran. There is a video of a white man beating his white girlfriend for about 10 minutes at an auto shop while other white men simply looked on and did nothing. Today’s white men, unlike past white men, are not protecting our women. We don’t even protect outselves. White women need to speak out more than you do.

Velvet Queen said...

Wow—pardon me, but I have got ssssoooo much to say concerning this matter. First of all, I was utterly disgusted when Kanye took the mic away from Taylor Swift and just had to add his few cents about who he feels should have won the award. That's no class, and no integrity. I was really ticked off........and as a young, black woman....for a lot more reasons than the average Taylor Swift fan.

First of all, Kanye reinstated the “boogie black man” stereotype to people who are influenced by those things. Secondly, he's “supposed” to be a grown man and he literally picks on a 19 year old (uh, hello?!). Thirdly, he basically robbed Beyonce of having HER moment which she rightfully deserved just as much as Taylor. So because of his childish actions, Beyonce had to humble herself FOR HER OWN SAKE! I honestly don't even think he cared that much about Beyonce's award. It seems like he just wanted to crack a joke or something......? Was he drunk? That doesn't even come off as trying to uplift “black womanhood”.

I'm not saying Beyonce didn't mean her show of care by calling Taylor Swift back onto the stage. I would have done the same thing. It would have seemed to be the right thing to do. I commend her for that. I actually cried a little when I saw the expression on Taylor's face after Kanye had finished his opinion.

My own father was mad at Kanye for making a fool out of himself. He said that what he did just makes things bad for black people all over. So yes, he's got a right to be mad! Ha, ha!

And yes, I really feel that Obama should keep some things to himself. Especially, in the celebrity world. He's occupying a particular position and there's a measure of responsibility and class that also comes with that. If he didn't find it necessary to mention how certain people needed to back off his wife then I see no need in him having to mention anything about Taylor Swift. On or off the record. Defending a celebrity isn't even half as honorable as defending your wife. I've got a problem with that.

All Kanye West did was boost Taylor Swift's popularity.

I agree about Don Imus. The only reason black people went after him is because he was white. In a matter of fact, during the whole situation I was bemoaning all the commotion going on about him. What I really wanted was a lot of rappers and R&B/Hip-Hop artists to get blasted because of their constant degradation of black women. I could care less about an ignorant radio show host who's white. It's the ones that are black that make all the difference. Don Imus is just being a lame copycat. Laughable. It's like, shooting a star down when there are tons of others in the sky. Wow, that made sssooo much of a difference!




I sincerely hope that one day a grand show of support will be shown to a black woman in the public eye.

When I remember the Rihanna incident, it brings tears to my eyes. What were a whole lot of black men doing then? They were saying it was her fault and that she deserved it. Where were the large numbers of black women? Fighting amongst themselves over who would stand with the black man and who would stand for the protection of their womanhood. Where were white women? Well, a lot of them were saying that it wasn't any of their concern. As for white men? Gee, I wonder who it was who wanted to prosecute Chris Brown and was just waiting for the opportunity but was getting little to no support?????? My own boyfriend (who's white) was ticked off that Chris Brown was, in his opinion, getting off way to easily. He doesn't understand how so many black people could stand behind Chris Brown like that. If it was him, he'd be out for blood.

I'm talking generalizations here and my own personal opinion.

Zindzi said...

Whew, so many things to say. First, I totally agree with Sara on Barack's reaction. As my sister posted on my FB wall, "typical Obama shit. White folks actin a fool all around him yet he has the time to single out one BM for an entertaining display of hubris." Its strange that he has comments to make on Kanye but NONE of the things you mentioned.

I have to say I must agree with the anonymous poster who said, wasn't Kanye standing up for a Black woman that night? I mean, he perceived an injustice was done against Beyonce and he made it PUBLICLY known. I don't know how much clearer that could be.

I also agree with Velvet Queen on the principle that Kanye's behavior fed into the whole "big black man attacks poor little white girl," stereotype. I thought it was pretty hilarious myself, but in the larger scope of things, it didn't do BP a favor at all.

I also have to agree with justaguy in that I don't see a where a whole lot of WM defend WW. Chicagoans have seen that video of a White male police officer beating the SHIT out of a white female bartender while nobody did a damn thing...all white folks present. I'm surely not saying BM are not guilty of not defending BW, but it seems that the ills of our society are simply worsened when it comes to minority communities (the whole 'when America catches a cold, Black America catches the flu' theory).

All in all, I didn't see the big freakin deal. As Sara said, there are much more important things to be worried about...and if she had been Black, it wouldn't have been as big of a deal.

Aphrodite said...

Justaguy,


WW are not UNMARRIED at the rates BW are.

WW do not have the OOW birth rates that BW do.

Most WW and other nonBW have INTACT family systems and support structures within this generation unlike BW.

WW have SOCIAL CAPITAL and MOBILITY that BW currently don't have/exercise.


If you have a gripe about whatever - work it out in therapy, k? This is a BW blog and if you think WW are in need of help you need to be about your business rectifying that.


Good luck in all your future endeavors.

Aphrodite said...

Ok, now I am mad at Janet.

SweetSoulSister said...

JustaGuy,

Yes, the world does come to the rescue of white women. ESPECIALLY if the perp is a negro. Let's be honest here, when a black person does something against a white woman (in particular), the press always runs with it because it's an effective propaganda tool. They know it will push white men's buttons and make them say "see? look at those n***ers, we gave them their rights and they attack us and our women". The black/white thing has been apart of this country since it's inception and there were many acts of violence perpetrated against blacks because of white women-alot of times, because of lies.

When it comes to white men NOT protecting their women against other white men, I fully agree with you. My best friend of many, many years is a white woman and we talked about how hypocritical white nationalists are because they only go after minorities who attack white women and never their fellow white men. It's the same story for the non nationalist/ general population of white men. It's ok if a white woman is being attacked as long as a "mud" isn't doing it. That, to me, should render the pedestal obsolete because if you really cared about your women, you would ALWAYS defend them.

I'd never even heard about the Seattle Mardi Gras incident so, I looked it up and I find it REPREHENSIBLE. From your post, I picked up a few things I guess you were talking about Tawana Brawley and the stripper ho's who accused the Duke students of rape, I want you to know I DID NOT and DO NOT condone those actions and neither does anyone I know. I am almost always willing to give the white guy the benefit of the doubt because my experiences with white men have been the most favorable experiences I've had with any kind of people. You cannot possibly think we're all the same (defending horrible, violent behaviors), otherwise you would not be on this blog. When you speak of past white men defending their women, it makes me think you long for the good old days of indiscriminate, unjustifiable lynchings. I could be wrong but, that is how I read your post. Is that what you are saying?

Alta said...

I have no problem with Obama talking about the Taylor Swift thing. It wasn't a question asked during an interview like the Gates thing; it was before the interview started, and the reporter had his tape going. Obama even wondered if the mic was on after he said it. Everyone was talking about the Taylor mess, and with Obama having two young kids, I'm not surprised he knows about it and actually had an opinion on it.

I'm pretty sure he also has an opinion on the names Michelle has been called and the commentary on his oldest daughter. It just so happens there were no mics there to catch his reaction. I'm pretty sure Michelle wouldn't be with him if she felt he didn't care what people said about her.

I don't care that people are in a tizzy about Taylor Swift and Kanye. I'm just shaking my head. The POTUS gets interrepted while speaking to Congress, and people talk about it for 2 seconds, and the interrupter gets money. Taylor swift gets a microphone taken from her, and people are outraged.

Kanye is a jackass. I don't know why people are acting so shocked. It wasn't even the first time he interrupted someone while they were accepting their award.

Anonymous said...

I was told that President Obama did not accept a diplomat from Nigeria because his son raped and abuse women in Nigeria.

Good for the President.

lois

Anonymous said...

JustaGuy(supposely)

You should re-read Sarah's comments about Al and Jessie.

lois

Taylor-Sara said...

Uh Z. I appreciate your comments, but next time-please leave off the curse words. Please see the dialogue box for clearification....

Anonymous said...

i have to say for this particular post I agree. white women are definitely on a pedestal. Its sort of sad and sickening that TS received more media attention for something as stupid (though rude as it was) as kanye going on stage and interrupting her than the hundreds of thousands of bw being raped and mutilated in Congo and in southern sudan. I had to dig and dig to find out about the congo conflict, i found out about it on a site geared towards bw actually...and i have yet to see extensive media coverage or outrage about that, something that actually matters...yet this is plastered all over the news...hmmm...idk??? Kanye was rude and ignorant to do that...but come on its not the end of the damn world. In terms of the imus thing. I know personally many a white male who actually felt the whole thing was "blown out of proportion..." and they may not have encouraged the behavior, but in my experience most of the outrage came from the black community. I think it was more embarassment on the part of the bc than actually caring about bw actually. That is why DL hughely the idiot and party felt the need to reiterate the insults imus made. they were embarassed and ashamed that bw were being degraded once again and that "Their," women as a collective thus being singled out and degraded as the ugliest/worthless, so to make themselves better they joined in the party out of shame/embarassment. i see it all the time. But I would also like to add wasn't it a white woman feminist who said that the DOn Imus incident was another example of racism being put before sexism, omitting the fact that the rutgers team are WOMEN as well as black...hello. So,no, i'm sorry as a collective white women do not have black women's backs. You can be friends with ww, as individuals, but as a cultural group, ww do not have bw's backs...sorry. Yes, ww are on a pedestal just look at the news and observe what happens next time a ww goes missing vs. a bw going missing...please and Janet Jackson sending flowers was over the top...i'm sorry kanye did that...it was rude and ignorant, but not the end of the world once again...i don't agree with everything said on this blog all the time, but this post i agree with...

Anonymous said...

i would also like to add that the whole degradation of the bw and bm not protecting/support bw stems from shame/embarassment over bw as group. Bm as a collective have been brainwashed due to racism/white supremacism to be ashamed of bw and feel we are worthless and not worthy of protection. the only reason they jumped to the defense (some bm) for the imus situation was because it bruised their ego. no one wants to believe the women within their culture are the least attractive (ofcourse bw are not the least attractive, we are gorgeous and just as beautiful as any woman) but the world has brainwashed so many weak-minded individuals who are black and male to believe we are ugly and worthless that it seems like a waste to protect us...that's what its about...

Jordan said...

I know Im going to sound extrmely ignorant to some but personally I didnt find it rude it bothered me more that a male called the president a liar just a week or so before and noone cared so I feel like this if Joe Wilson has the right to tell Obama " You Lie" Kanye has the right to say Taylor didnt deserve the award.... shrugs shoulders

Anonymous said...

btw...heres a link to a bw supporting the women of the congo.
http://whattamisaid.blogspot.com/

Woman of Valor said...

I really don't follow the popular music world closely these days, so I missed the Kanye West thing. For days, I was wondering what people were talking about - because I noticed he was all over blogs, news articles, TV, YouTube, Twitter, etc. with people even saying such things - I just didn't care enough to look it up. When I found out that all he'd done was make an extremely rude attack at the VMA awards - while very classless, inappropriate and out of line - I was shocked. You'd think he'd attacked her and pushed her off the stage the way people were going on and on, turning him into a complete monster, some even to the point that they said he could redeem himself by committing suicide, getting run over by a car, and so on. It was really just another case of someone being extremely insensitive and clueless, and it was blown way out of proportion. I couldn't believe that someone thought it was important enough to as for the President's opinion on it, lol - as if there aren't far more important things going on countrywide and worldwide than Kanye dissing some girl at the VMA.

Hi, Sara...I got your comment on my blog, but I wasn't sure if you saw it because there was a 2-week gap. I just wanted you to know that I wasn't trying to diss you in some way by not announcing my blog on yours. I didn't actually mention my blog anywhere at all accept on Facebook at first, and one of the ladies there was kind enough to let Evia know about it.

Halima said...

SweetSoulSister
Not that we know of and the person doing the sending certainly would've made a press release about it. Janet Jackson certainly rushed to send Taylor Swift flowers. Where was Taylor Swift when Rhianna got beaten?? She and Carrie Underwood both said "it's none of my business, I'm staying out of it."

If this is true that carrie and taylor opted out during the Rhianna incident sweetsoulsister, and now Janet Jackson is rushing to buy flowers for TS then it just underscores my belief that bw are in a confused state and walking around like zombies from the living dead.

And I totally agree with you re this:

In most ways, when it comes to the plight of BW, ww are just as bad and sometimes worse than negro males. I don't trust them collectively (I don't trust anyone collectively, woman/man, black/white). That's not bitterness, jealousy, nor anger. It's real talk from experience with them.

One of the big hindrances of bw in this society is their constant need to prove against accusations (most carefully manufactured) and in this case that they are not jealous of ww. Bw will drink poison if they are told that not drinking the poison means they are jealous of ww.

nuff said!

Supposing I wanted to Date a White Guy...?

Julia said...

This is part of my response to theFeminization of BM topic, but is even more appropriate for this topic:

...that Natalee Holloway was drinking it up and whoring it up with total strangers in Aruba, the MSM bent over backwards to imply that she was such an innocent and bright little girl whose path somehow cross that of those local savages.
And with a tv movie, the halo was complete.(No kidding!)
.....
Back in february,did the Rn'B princess deserve to hear from a rapper 'Keep your head up' directed not at her, but at her boyfriend/abuser,when she was the one suffering from bruises,cuts and bites??

In a nutshell,yes they are on a pedestal.
The feminist movement had nothing to do with BW.

Anonymous said...

I don't know why we always said that all WW don't have our backs. Back when I was coming up, when I went through a lot, WW always gave me a helping hand. I had white female friends, and they NEVER look down on me like I'm beneath them. When it comes to black men, I agree with you. We need to seperate ourselves from them because most of them are damage beyond repair. We should be looking for men that will love us back. But I feel that when it comes to non-BW, yes it's true that collectively they will not have our backs, but some of them will and you need to look to those women. I believe that when it comes to WOMEN, we all need to support each other. When it comes to black women, yes, we do need to support ourselves first. I don't understand why you have animosity towards non-BW. Of course they were trained to hate us, but you can't assume that all of them are our enemy. I feel that we as WOMEN need to stop fighting each other and create true sisterhood. All this BW vs. non-BW stuff is getting out of hand. That's my opinion.

Anonymous said...

"WW don't have our backs. Back when I was coming up, when I went through a lot, WW always gave me a helping hand. I had white female friends, and they NEVER look down on me like I'm beneath them. When it comes to black men, I agree with you. "
so basically, you just said what i said...i don't think i ever posted that all ww didn't have our backs actually i said..."So,no, i'm sorry as a collective white women do not have black women's backs. You can be friends with ww, as individuals, but as a cultural group, ww do not have bw's backs...sorry." So....read my comment more carefully next time. Also i'm sorry but white folks in general tend to not have black women's backs, so don't just single bm out on that one...yeah as a group bm look out for themselves, but white people also look out for themselves...bw aren't their top priority either. I have no animosity to non-bw...only honesty

Anonymous said...

"I don't know why we always said that all WW don't have our backs. Back when I was coming up, when I went through a lot, WW always gave me a helping hand."

really that's interesting...when i am going through something my FRIENDS give me a hand, my friends come in all colors...including white,black,brown,yellow etc...was it white women giving you a helping hand or women who were white, who were your friends???

Taylor-Sara said...

Last Anon. I assume when you use 'you' on my blog, you are referring to me. And I find that stmt insulting and ridiculous. 'I' do NOT have animosity toward any woman I do not know! Perhaps a class on reading comprehension would serve you better than making unfounded accusations. I have said time and again. I want the BEST for ALL women, but I am only willing to put my efforts towards black women! We have unique problems that require our full attention, and we cannot afford to squander our energy on ppl who would take it-better their own lives, and leave us behind looking stupid. This has happened too many times to count. When Helen G of COSMO mag told Naomi C. that it would be a cold day in hell before she allowed a bw to be on the cover of Cosmo. Mag. How many ww even cared. When Cover girl stated (yrs ago) that the cover girl look is a beautiful white face with blond hair, and blue eyes, how many ww corrected them and said. "No cover girl should represent ALL beauty!" When ww see themselves in commercials doing hair, skin, and beauty commercials, and bw are 99% excluded, how come they have ABSOLUTELY no problem with that? Because they (for the most part) only care about WW! And they already have it better than ANY other women in the world in case you have no noticed. Notice when something happens to a ww, they are quick to respond and garner media coverage, yet whenever something happens to bw, they make it clear-it is NOT their concern. Also Anon. several ppl have said to love ppl indiv, but don't trust them as a whole, I agree wholeheartedly with that. I love all my white Aunts dearly, and the only ww in the family I don't like is my cousin's wife. But the point is- when you cannot trust/ or count on the group, learn to get to know the individ's within it, and to give your love and support selectively...I have never expressed any animosity toward non-bw. (because I don't have any) You need to read more in depthly..

Anonymous said...

evie/esha/sara/ whomever you are, or claim to be this week, you are a racist ignorant woman (i use that word loosely) who makes her jealousy of white women very apparent. wanna benefit us black women? stop drooling on the white man's balls and find you a REAL black MAN and stop putting focus on these prepubescent black man boys who everyone knows ain't no good. If you would just grow up and show you have some sort of education, you would find plenty of black men who support and adore black women. you are ignorant and i can't stand the poison that comes from your words. you are poison, and you're spreading hate!! HATEMONGERER! HARLOT! You are disgusting. Not every white man who gets his hand on a black woman loves and respects her because I have been in plenty of interracial relationships where I was treated disgustingly and used only to get closer to my WHITE female friends! So these white men you worship DO NOT WANT US!!! They want WHITE women, just like the manboys you try to make every black man look like! You racist evil witch!

Anonymous said...

"Taylor represents what most people in America like to put on a pedestal- an attractive, young, blonde WW."

White men do put white women on a pedestal. But that' there job! They defend their women! No one should complain about that. The question shouldn't be why do white men put their women on a pedestal. The real question is why don't black men put black women on a pedestal?

Taylor-Sara said...

Wow, last Anon, you had alot to say, and non of it making much sense! I have one simple question for you, if you feel that way-then why are you here?
See that's the def. of insanity doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. You know what this blog is about, if it's offensive to you, then stay the hell off of it! It's really simple when you think about it. Also, anyone with half an eye can see that Evia and I could never be the same person since I can't even 'pretend' to write as well as she does. Any fool can see she's a highly skilled orator/writer, whereas I'm a far more mundane one. You're silly and not worth responding to, so I have no intentions of doing it again. Please remove yourself from MY blog, and our discussion, and should the need overtake you in the future, to put me in my place-call someone who gives a damn what you think. (I can assure you no one here fits that bill...)

Anonymous said...

Stupid Alcholic Anon said...evie/esha/sara/ whomever you are, or claim to be this week, you are a racist ignorant woman (i use that word loosely) who makes her jealousy of white women very apparent. wanna benefit us black women? stop drooling on the white man's balls and find you a REAL black MAN and stop putting focus on these prepubescent black man boys who everyone knows ain't no good. If you would just grow up and show you have some sort of education, you would find plenty of black men who support and adore black women. you are ignorant and i can't stand the poison that comes from your words. you are poison, and you're spreading hate!! HATEMONGERER! HARLOT! You are disgusting. Not every white man who gets his hand on a black woman loves and respects her because I have been in plenty of interracial relationships where I was treated disgustingly and used only to get closer to my WHITE female friends! So these white men you worship DO NOT WANT US!!! They want WHITE women, just like the manboys you try to make every black man look like! You racist evil witch!




This is one confused "black" woman. It is evident this person or it, trolls around on other blogs. She/He/It..but let me assume "she" for the sake of argument. She has such low self esteem that she can't even see that there are plenty of desirable men out there who also RETURN the favor. She must be some very bitter chick whom black men don't want who is probably some black nationalist negress following her black negroes to the grave while he's with his white wimins. Hey, maybe that's what it is.

She is getting this "white men do not wants us" E. Coli speech from these same negroes/shegroes whateva you call those feminized dudes.

It's a shame some one can point out that people are racist for showing the fact that certain long held idiot beliefs are false. i.e, that white or other men find us undesirable.

If this negress wants to remain scraping for her black panther lover as a black bottom feeder to *her* black male IDOL let her be. She's the type of mule they love to beat to death!!!!

I said...

Hi Sara,

I love this post(I love them all, actually). You and all the other wonderful BWE bloggers are a blessing to bw and bgs. The time you dedicate, the sacrifices you make and abuse you have to endure in order to help bw have quality lives is very admirable.

Please, don't ever give up the fight because many of us are behind you and have your back. The message is getting out there.

Unfortunately, that's the way it is. Whenever anything remotely negative or anything perceived as negative is said about ww, and it's coming from a bw; you're attacking them out of jealousy even when it's justified or just an observation, it's insane.

In my case: I was having a problem with a wf co-worker, who constantly bad mouthed me the moment my back was turned with other co-workers and I would hear her saying very negative sometimes in earshot,this got worse when she discovered I was buying my first home, while she is still living at home at 36. She would be very friendly with me in our interactions and would often invite me to hang out with her and other co-workers(the old, keep your friends close but your enemies closer).

I was so annoyed by this and needed to vent to someone, anyone. So I did, to a hw co-worker who knew this ww was talking badly about me.

Well, a few days later I over heard the hw telling another co-worker that I was mad at the ww co-worker because I was jealous of HER. Outrageous,I was just reacting to the negativity I had been receiving from the ww.

White women are sacred and no matter how nasty they behavior towards bw, the moment you protest, you're the one with the problem.

Ladies, please don't buy into
this. The pedestal ww are on has been very harmful to other women. Especially, to bw and it must be torn down at some point. Just take a look at the beauty industry and how they(ww) are doing everything to keep our images out of the media. Why should we be shut out from making all that money, when there are a lot of beautiful bw who deserve to work?

Sorry for the book. I know I was all over the place.

lormarie said...

I agree with the posters who said that ww aren't protected when they are victims of wm. White nationalism is brutal towards ww.
WW are not the enemy as a group. I've had plenty of white female friends over the years. In fact, ww have gone to bat for me when bw turned against me. However, the feminist movement was created by ww FOR WW. So bw need a movement of their own. We can be allies of ww but we must understand that not all of them will be our friends.

Anonymous said...

In case you didn't know my name, my name is
Nicole, and I was the one that said that we should get along with all women. I get what you are saying now, Sara. We need to look for ourselves first, and choose the ones that embrace our interests and agenda. One thing about white people though, they do stick together. I still believe that we should date those who want us. I'm sick of people telling me that non-black men find us unattractive when I KNOW that's a lie, especially where I work at. We do need to support each other as black women first and look out for our interest because black men and white people as a whole is not going to do it for us. It's up to US to know who and what we want. I just want to ask you a question though. I listen to all kinds of female artists of all races that know how to sing. Do I have to get of CDs that's by a non-black female singer like Barbra Streisand because of our agenda to focus on black women. I support black AND white female artist that know how to sing. That's the reason why I said that we as women of ALL races should get along with each other because not only I have a Whitney Houston, Aretha Franklin, Patti Labelle, Faith Evans, Deborah Cox Beyonce, Tramaine Hawkins, Karen Clark Sheard's or other black female artists' CDs, but I also have non-black female artists' CDs like Christina Aguilera, Barbra Streisand, Celine Dion, Olivia Newton John's or other non-black female's CDs. I know that this is out of topic, but I'm confused.

Harmony said...

I have to agree with SweetSoulSister regarding white women as collective friends.

As we have seen, white women DO NOT defend black women from insults, despite being women, too. In fact, they don't do anything. Where were those feminist/women's rights groups during Rhianna's beating and the Rutger's basketball players?

"In fact, most bw are the enemy to other bw as well because they are constantly defending Miss Anne's virtue."

I agree with this too and there are quite a few of them on here.

For example, I have been on many blogs and whenever a question was asked about the dynamics between black women and black men and I have seen SEVERAL white women take black mens' side and believe we are the ones responsible for why black men date out of their race and such.
So imo, we should NOT be so quick to see them as friends.

Why should we bend over backwards for other women when they do not do the same for us?

I don't see them as enemies, but I certainly do not see them as friends and they are just as bad if not worse than black males in their anti-black woman behavior.

"(I don't trust anyone collectively, woman/man, black/white). That's not bitterness, jealousy, nor anger. It's real talk from experience with them."

This has been my experience too and I also have a similar view of people.

Lena said...

Taylor Swift getting insulted by Kanye resulting in Kanye getting censure from the wider society. Meanwhile when black women are abused or even murdered(most of the killers of black women are black men) there is hardly any righteous indignation from the wider society. I think mainly because a lot of these horror stories go unreported.

I'm glad Beyonce stood by Taylor Swift that was not only the right thing to do it showed decorum and class.

Aphrodite said...

September 22, 2009 12:08 AM
Anonymous said...

"Bm as a collective have been brainwashed due to racism/white supremacism to be ashamed of bw and feel we are worthless and not worthy of protection."



IMO Black men are actively choosing to discriminate and perpetrate racism and sexism against BW. I don't buy the brainwashing argument. This is a choice.

Aphrodite said...

@ Halima,


"One of the big hindrances of bw in this society is their constant need to prove against accusations (most carefully manufactured) and in this case that they are not jealous of ww. Bw will drink poison if they are told that not drinking the poison means they are jealous of ww."


This should be engraved in bronze. It is priceless.

Aphrodite said...

@ Sara

"I want the BEST for ALL women, but I am only willing to put my efforts towards black women! We have unique problems that require our full attention, and we cannot afford to squander our energy on ppl who would take it-better their own lives, and leave us behind looking stupid. This has happened too many times to count....."


So on point! I don't know why peeps steady get it twisted. The whole purpose of these blogs is to teach BW to put their thinking caps on.

No one is saying stay away from nonBW or not to have them as friends. After you have thoroughly vetted them of course.

But WW women are collectively in a much better position than BW and have been so for longer- that can't be denied. So when it comes to collective advancement its BW first and foremost always.

And if someone else wants a piece of my pie then they better give me a slice of cake in return. It is about reciprocity, valuing what you have, be treated in a way that is on par with what you are worth and have to offer.

BW women obviously have much to offer/resources of value or else there wouldn't be such a campaign to convince them that they are the "lowest on the totem pole". If you think you're nothing then you will allow people to treat you any kind of way.


The Anon/anons remind me so much of blog Khadija wrote about casting pearls before swine and the posts Khadija wrote about politicians who try so hard to prove they are colorblind, raceless/post-racial.

Why would you continually volunteer to give away your resources to people for free - with no guarantee that they will ride or die and go hard on your behalf in return?

Unless you secretly felt that they were better/more deserving and you just want to be used bc that will be the outcome if you don't clearly articulate the terms/introduce leverage of some sort.

We already know what that outcome has been like. Is it not time for this to stop???

Aphrodite said...

I wish I had the energy ... :)


Anon you are an embarrassment to BW everywhere. If you are a BW.


" evie/esha/sara/ whomever you are, or claim to be this week,"


Boo, so you are saying that all BW are stupid. There can only be one BW who uses multiple identities who shares these sentiments?



"who makes her jealousy of white women very apparent."


Schoolyard logic. Criticize or complain about something unjust in order to improve it - its jealousy. Tell the truth - its jealousy. Don't support other BW or BM in the tom foolery they engage in- you jealous.


I personally would be ashamed as a BW (if that is what you are) to elevate another woman's issues and battles over my own. Especially someone who has more resources and support than I do.



If you want to ride and die for Miss Anne and de' white wimmins go right ahead. Ain't nobody stopping you. When the ghettoapocalypse or one of the many social ills that befall BW that are NOT affecting Miss Anne and the cotillion crew come down on your head - maybe Miss Anne will come galloping in on her white stallion and rescue you, but its highly doubtful.



"stop drooling on the white man's balls and find you a REAL black MAN and stop putting focus on these prepubescent black man boys who everyone knows ain't no good."


You sound confused. And nasty, but I digress. So first you riding and dying for Miss Anne, but now her men are not really men?


"you would find plenty of black men who support and adore black women."


Where deez men at? 'Cause 80% of BW are not married. So there is a problem. Can you go on Dr. Phil with a heat sensitive map to detail the locations of these BM who are so in love with BW for the 80% that don't have them? How do you sound? LOL



"you are ignorant and i can't stand the poison that comes from your words. you are poison, and you're spreading hate!! HATEMONGERER! HARLOT! You are disgusting."

Wow. BW empowerment/self love is really threatening. You remind me of the reasons Harriet Tubman carried a gun. Is Miss. Anne giving you an extra ration of vittles to snitch on the runaways? LOL



"Not every white man who gets his hand on a black woman loves and respects her because I have been in plenty of interracial relationships where I was treated disgustingly and used only to get closer to my WHITE female friends! So these white men you worship DO NOT WANT US!!! They want WHITE women, just like the manboys you try to make every black man look like! You racist evil witch!"


Wow. That is insane. I refuse! LOL This is so stupid and made up! Either you are stupid- well we know that - or the men you were dealing with were. Why in the world would a white man who has access to most women the world over USE a BW to get next to another WW? That is like voluntarily hiring a middleman even though you have direct access to the main supplier. Now I know you are a liar and a troll.

Aphrodite said...

@ I,

I am glad you shared. Congrats on the house! I hope to join you one day soon, but I want to build a - green home/religious retreat that is completely energy independent.

Anyway you have to be cautious. I have a policy. I never talk to my co-workers/schoolmates etc about my personal life anymore at all not even casual insignificant things and especially not about relationships. I don't even let them know where I live. And I am still figuring out how to navigate networking while maintaining some distance and privacy.


It took me a min to realize on a personal level that WW can be just as horrible:

I had one ask me - how did you get accepted there, how are you paying for it blah blah blah and you know she was entitled to have me, the lowly negro justify my finances to her, Miss Anne the total stranger, bc she was white - as if that was normal. Of course I didn't. Yay for me bc I used to have this habit of indulging boundary-less people and basically being a "refugee" apologizing and diminishing my successes. But no more! It is empowering to tell people to get out of your space when they are being inappropriate.


But there is the WW bank teller I want to choke. I have been working on my businesses and growing them - I was making some regular deposits and she asked me where I was getting all this money from. I thought the so and so was joking. Cause I mean we are both grown women. But the so and so was serious. If yall hear about a BW snapping and choking the crap out an elderly WW teller on the news - its me.

I could go on and on. If you live in a better area that they don't think BW should live in, if you are traveling for pleasure a little too often..if you are beautifying yourself in a way that WW may do all the time, but is perceived as high maintenance.... etc etc


The killer is that my mom and my grandmother always told me to keep my mouth shut and I never listened.


I couldn't conceive of a nonBW ever wanting to sabotage or being jealous of a BW, but in looking back I can see it now.

But maybe what they told me is more applicable where I live now. I don't know. There is some deep poverty where I live and the killer is that there are more white folks than black folks suffering in poverty bc there are more of them. And they consistently go against their interests by supporting things that will only benefit the top 5% of other white folks.


Anyway, there are some WW who probably feel they should be further along or doing better bc they are White - so as CW says use stealth and keep it moving.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Nicole Little said...

OK, I hear a lot of people saying that I'm defending Miss Anne when I'm not defending anyone. Ya'll took it the wrong way. I also said that we should look for ourselves more than other people because I also believe that black women are in worse shape than white women because not only are we black, but we are women, so of course we need to look out for ourselves because we have unique problems that other women don't have. I NEVER said that we should be friends to all non-black women because common sense will say that overall, non-black women will always put themselves first before us. All I say was we should get along with the non-black women that have our best interests individually, not collectively. But at the same time, I'm not going to COMPLETELY shut non-black women out, and if that makes me weak, oh well. I'm not going to do it. That's not right.

Julia M. said...

I think your are crossing the line here. Bashing Barack Obama?

Is he not suppose to live and have an opinion about things too?
Stop acting like white people, thinking because you have someone in the white house they are suppose do what you say.

I happen to be very disappointed with Kanye. He only did it with a white girl because he would have never disrespected a Black Women or Black Man like that. He makes African Americans look bad .

She was 19 years old winning her first award and it got ruined. Taylor Swift was classy about it thought, she didn't reply mad, she simply shrugged it off. I actually felt bad for her. Beyonce' was nice to do what she did but she had to save her butt. I can respect them both for handling this matter in a classy was despite Kanye and his immature self.

Back to the President. He isn't the President for Black People only, he is the president for all people. How do we know that he hasn't made "off the record" statements about all of those cases. This was the only one that was put out there.

I love Barack Obama and you guys clearly don't because he isn't commenting on what you want. He's not a robot, nor will he ever be. He can comment on what he likes, hell he might comment on everything we're talking about. Whether it's getting revealed or simply looked over is a different story.

The white girl was done wrong, if it was a Black Women like Mary or a Black Actress ,you would want the president to comment then right?

I see there is another Julia on here, I guess I have to go with Julia M.

Julia M. said...

(Let's try this again, I see my comment wasn't approved last time for some reason. It says this website is for Black Women in Interracial Relationships, seeing how I am a Black Women and my husband is Irish American you think my opinion would be accepted. I guess I'm not jumping on the "Barack Obama is not with Black Women" train. Forgive me If I don't want to be a follower. Clearly this blog is not what I thought it was, I was looking for some comfort about the whole Interracial Dating. Figure it would do some good to talk to other Black Women in that type of relationship, I guess not)

I think your are crossing the line here. Bashing Barack Obama?

Is he not suppose to live and have an opinion about things too?

I happen to be very disappointed with Kanye. He only did it with a white girl because he would have never disrespected a Black Women or Black Man like that. He makes African Americans look bad .
She was 19 years old winning her first award and it got ruined. Taylor Swift was classy about it though, she didn't reply mad, she simply shrugged it off.Beyonce' was nice to do what she did but she had to save her butt. I can respect them both for handling this matter in a classy was despite Kanye and his immature self.

Back to the President, He isn't the President for Black People only, he is the president for all people. How do we know that he hasn't made "off the record" statements about all of those cases. This was the only one that was put out there.

I love Barack Obama and you guys clearly don't because he isn't commenting on what you want. He's not a robot, nor will he ever be. He can comment on what he likes, hell he might comment on everything we're talking about. Whether it's getting revealed or simply looked over is a different story.

The white girl was done wrong, if it was a Black Women like Mary or a Black Actress ,you would want the president to comment then right?

I see there is another Julia on here, I guess I have to go with Julia M.

I said...

Thanks Aphorite,

You're so right. When bw are working in environments with non-bw(especially ww), we should be careful with the information we choose to devulge about our personal lives. I have had to learn that one, too.

The thing is, I am the only black person working in my department, so you know it's not easy for me, but I don't let them phase me anymore. I come to work, make my money, pay my bills, enjoy my life and keep it moving.

Thanks. I'm much happier where I reside now. It's good to be out of the all-black hellhole, I moved away from almost a year ago.

Good luck, to you on getting out. I know you will make it off the plantation and I hope a lot of other bw will also follow suit.

Taylor-Sara said...

First of all Julia M. let's get something straight shall we. This is MY blog! and you are the one crossing the line. I was not bashing the President, but if I chose to bash him, there really is not a damn thing you could do about it. I just think he should not be commenting on something so frivolous. Now I don't know which comment you made that was not approved, but once again, all comments are subject to approval, and if I don't feel that it adds anything relevant to the conversation, or takes us off course then I will not approve it. Any blog Admin. will tell you the same. I do have alot of comments, some of which are not suitable to post, and some that are totally irrelevant. Sometimes ppl are mistakenly deleted. I cannot tell you for sure, because I have no idea to which comment you are referring, but I strongly suggest you change your tone, if you plan on continuing to comment here-thank you

Lavette said...

@Aphrodite...Thanks for the congrats much appreciated!

Anonymous said...

"He makes African Americans look bad."

No. He makes bm look bad.

Julia M. said...

Forgive me, I wasn't aware of how long it took to "approve" a comment. I'm used to seeing my comments posted the minute I hit submit. You can delete one of the two since It is technically a double post.

Please don't get an attitude with me, I'm coming to you with respect so please give me the same. I'm well aware of the fact that this is your blog. I'm not looking to take over.

My tone is not going to be changed because it's not disrespectful. It's how you interrupt my comments. I assure you it's not in a disrespectful way. Whether or not I will continue to comment on here is unknown. I'm really trying to do something new, in all the years I've been married and with my husband, I've really avoid blogs like this. Now that I am with child, I've been looking for a little comfort and since I saw you gave birth not too long ago. I figure this will be good for me.

My husband actually suggested it, we're thinking about getting a counselor but I'd rather find an alternative way that doesn't involve our wallets being hit.

Aphrodite said...

@ Julia M

"I think your are crossing the line here. Bashing Barack Obama?

Is he not suppose to live and have an opinion about things too?
Stop acting like white people, thinking because you have someone in the white house they are suppose do what you say."



Since when is criticism- bashing?

Who cares what his personal opinions are. He is elected to do a job - by the people for the people. If whats good for the people conflicts with his personal opinions- oh well, too bad for him.


"Stop acting like white people, thinking because you have someone in the white house they are suppose do what you say."


Wow this is the fool statement of the year. How is that acting white? That is exercising common sense. That is the whole purpose of getting your politician in the whitehouse [or whatever office] - so that they will do what you say. Votes always come with strings attached. Black people from what I understand used to know that.



"Please don't get an attitude with me, I'm coming to you with respect so please give me the same."

Wow. Some respect.



"we're thinking about getting a counselor but I'd rather find an alternative way that doesn't involve our wallets being hit."


That makes sense. You don't think BW should value their resources and give them away for free or cheap. So it should be ok that you came to Sara the way you did and on top of that expect for her to give you her resources (emotional/intellectual) for free. But you do recognize that your issues are deep enough to pay someone else.


Priceless.

At least you were upfront and honest.

Julia M. said...

Aphrodite,

It's not criticism. There's a complete difference between criticism and bashing. I don't see why there is an uproar about it. This was an "off the record" comment. He wasn't on national Television telling everyone his feelings about Kanye West. It was behind closed doors in the comfort of where ever he was at.

If you noticed I removed that comment in my second post. I didn't realize I put that till I hit submit. It's not acting white, since there is no such thing as acting white. I've got that label plenty of times though. What I meant was having the mentality of some white Americans who turn on people for not doing what they want. I don't want to point out certain groups so I'll just leave it at that.

I am coming in a respectful manner, I'm not cursing or writing in "CAPS". I'm simply stating my opinion and because it's not what you feel, doesn't make it wrong or disrespectful.

Please, stop talking to me as if I'm the enemy. I simply am commenting because my husband told me of this blog. I can't say I know many Black Women in Interracial Relationships and I figure it would be good, if I was around a group of Black Women who are. Despite the fact that this is the internet, my husband thinks it might give me some sort of comfort.

I'm not releasing my problems on Sara, I just thought it would be okay to maybe comment and possibly chat with other women like me. My problems do run deep in away, maybe even to the point of counseling. Interracial Dating alone is hard and not having the support of family and friends makes it even harder.

Forgive me if I insulted Sara with my point of view. Sadly I'm not a follower and I won't jump on your "Criticize Barack" boat. I happen to like him and think he is doing a good job so far. Like I said this was just an experiment, I've never been on blogs aimed towards Interracial Dating and clearly I know why.

This is not for me. Again, I apologize. My expectations of the African American women on here was clearly very high. I thought this would be a great place for me to discuss the hardships and my pregnancy with other women who have been pregnant. Sadly, I didn't get that.

Anonymous said...

Reading her drivel, I don't believe for one second that Julia M. is a black woman.

Anonymous said...

Nicole Little said...
OK, I hear a lot of people saying that I'm defending Miss Anne when I'm not defending anyone. Ya'll took it the wrong way. I also said that we should look for ourselves more than other people because I also believe that [BLACK WOMEN ARE IN WORSE SHAPE THAN WHITE WOMEN BECAUSE NOT ONLY ARE WE BLACK, BUT WE ARE WOMEN], so of course we need to look out for ourselves because [WE HAVE UNIQUE PROBLEMS OTHER WOMEN DON'T HAVE].
----

According to the above drivel, being born both black and female is pretty much a birth defect.

Nicole, are you sure you're a black woman?! Because according to what you wrote, being born the combination of black and female is pretty close to being born with a birth defect!

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
"He makes African Americans look bad."

"No. He makes bm look bad."

No. He makes only himself look bad.

Lynn said...

Kanye...oh no sweetheart...he makes Black Men look bad...yes, yes he does. I don't think too many people were surprised that he did it...just surprised at HOW he did it. Because these outbursts of his, these "cry me a river" outbursts like an baby are par for the course with Mr. West. So he is reflecting BLACK MEN and their typical babylike behavior.

arthur said...

Ok, Julia M, here's what I see: your husband suggested these blogs, and so you came here to prove him wrong.

At some level, you know that you have behaved in a way that Sara and the others would object to. Now, having provoked the rebuffs that you wanted, you can go to your husband and say "Well, I tried, but they are all mean Obama-bashers", or whatever. {Subtext to hubby: "and you were wrong again"}

The one thing I believe about your posts is that you are having marital problems.

Cynthia said...

Kanye West truly was a jerk for that stunt he pulled, but like what a few have stated before its just his character. Of course that does not and should not excuse his behavior but certainly most would agree the media coverage was a bit excessive. I also don't necessarily feel the entire backlash was due to his skin color. It may have played a part to some but I think for most people Kanye's arrogance and rudeness had just reached an all time high.

What really bugs me actually is how MTV puts the United States Congress to shame. Interesting that we can heavily reprimand an ignorant rapper for interrupting a young female during her speech but can't do the same when a political leader (whose held at a higher standard) heckles our president during his more important speech. For crying out loud, Kanye was immediately asked to leave the award show and this Joe Wilson guy raises millions of dollars and is barely reprimanded. Congress, get it together.

Anonymous said...

"This is not for me. Again, I apologize. My expectations of the African American women on here was clearly very high. I thought this would be a great place for me to discuss the hardships and my pregnancy with other women who have been pregnant. Sadly, I didn't get that."

I notice you keep trying to get in digs at African Americans. Let me take a wild guess: You're b!tchy @zz is black but NOT African American, right?

Taylor-Sara said...

Hi Arthur!
So great to hear from you again! I've been wondering where you were.

Julia M.
I wish you well during and after your pregnancy, but I really don't feel that we are good 'fit' for you. As I've said repeatedly, this blog is not meant for everyone, however we certainly wish you well. There are some excellent blogs on my sidebar, why don't you avail yourself of them. I would esp. recommend Evia, and Halima. They're quite calming to the spirit. And this sounds like it's exactly what you need.....good luck in all of your endeavors.

Nicole Little said...

Anon, I'm sorry for saying it like that. Being black and female is not a birth defect. It's a beautiful. I think that you took it the wrong way, and I don't want people to get the impression that I think that being black and female is wrong. I was saying because of the CULTURE that we live in that's white dominated and patriarchal, we have to work harder, that's all I'm saying. I'm glad to be a black woman, and I REFUSE to let people think that I'm less than just because of that. Being black and female is GOOD, not BAD! Please don't take it the wrong way!

lormarie said...

To the poster named Red. Many of the women you mentioned already had established careers in the entertainment industry before working with black directors. So their presence helped those black men rather than the other way around. As hard as it is to admit, bw are better served forming aliances with wm than we are with bm.

Ask yourself this, who helped the black directors to get where they are? White Men...

Taylor-Sara said...

Julia,
Your recent comments have been rejected. As I told you, this blog is not a good fit for you. Good luck in all you do....

respectmypeople said...

Why was the one woman's race and gender being questioned just because she didn't agree with you guys? I agree with her, this blog consists of a lot of followers who will jump on anything Sara says and act like it is the word of the lord. All of these BWIR bloggers I've read so far have this attitude like they're deities and their followers buy into it. I don't mean to offend anyone here and I'm sorry if I have, but that woman came here with good reason and it's unfair to judge her just because her opinions are different from yours. I mean, I also expected you women to be smarter than that since you want to encourage black women to be happier, but I guess that's wrong. What about the women who birthed those black men you call damaged beyond repair? Don't you think they're hurt by what you say? Or the sisters and aunts of those men. Do you look at your nephews and cousins as damaged beyond repair? What about your fathers? Were your mothers mammies for loving them? Was she a mammy when she gave birth to you? God made people, not statistics. So don't generalise all men like that because it is really mean.

thanks. you women deserve respect, but you do have to give it first. :)

Taylor-Sara said...

Hmmmmmmm
The minute one detractor is asked to leave someone 'claiming' to be a different person shows up. I wondered how long it would take before you tried this. Actually only 1 person questioned her (your) gender and race. Lets not lump everyone into one mass groupthink shall we. My readers always speak their minds. Sometimes they agree with me, and sometimes they don't. That is NEVER a problem. We encourage free thinking over here. To suggest otherwise is simply the voices in your head telling you this. I think this young lady (you) is in need of deeper help than we can provide you at this time. As for bw birthing these damaged men being upset- I'm not concerned about that. I'm concerned about all the women and children being hurt by these man-boys. And may I ask why are you asking such a question on a post that has NOTHING to do with this? Once again, this is designed to take us off track, on the defensive, and defending ourselves instead of dealing with real issues. You ppl are becomming increasingly transparent. If you have any more silly questions-email them, and stop clogging up my blog with nonsense....

Bellydancer said...

Notice how every time a real discussion comes up about the sanctity of white women worship, somebody always tries to change the subject to some minor unimportant thing like president bashing. First of all the president was not the subject at hand so why was that the major point in a previous post but I digress since she will no longer be posting here.
I tell you this Kanye knew not to do this to a black artist cuz he would have gotten his ass whooped.
Some of the bm protection squad have been crowing about how he did what he did to protect Beyonce since she should have won. I am like please Beyonce did not need his help and she damn sure ain't hurting for money. If these negros want to help bw with some things start off by donating your money and energy to domestic violence efforts, employ or mentor some young bw to help them through the entertainment business, build some affordable housing,start some small business for these women. Disrespecting a white woman to defend a black woman when she was in no real danger was stupid and silly and will cost him.
Black women need to let him speak and defend himself and he needs to quit blaming it on grief since he was showing out long before his mother's death.

Harmony said...

@ I

I have had the same thing happen to me many times off line and I didn't understand why that happened, but now I see what it really was.

I have also seen this occur online whenever a black woman criticizes any white/non black woman. The jealousy bitter excuse always comes out. Also people tend to post insulting questions about black women, yet when we respond to defend ourselves, we get branded as angry, attitudy,etc, even when defending ourselves against other's evilness.

It's what I call bait and switch.

Aphrodite said...

@ Harmony

Well now we know what it is: an attempt to shut us up and keep us in our place - similar to the way BM hurl the word feminist.

Aphrodite said...

{Putting on my remedial hometraining for grown folks cap....}



@ Respect


"this blog consists of a lot of followers who will jump on anything Sara says and act like it is the word of the lord. All of these BWIR bloggers I've read so far have this attitude like they're deities and their followers buy into it."


I call BULL. It is not hard to understand that when you are tearing down strongholds it is important to join together on points of commonality (despite differences) or the mission is aborted.

I'll bite and take what you say at face value. Sara and other bloggers are leaders. It is funny to me that BW will heap vitriol on BW leaders who are putting in work to save other BW's ungrateful collective azzes and yet these same women won't say peep to or about the DBRBM leaders- whether in the church house, the courthouse, or the whitehouse, who regularly throw BW under the bus. Meditate.



"I don't mean to offend anyone here and I'm sorry if I have, but that woman came here with good reason and it's unfair to judge her just because her opinions are different from yours."


That woman was insulting and had serious entitlement issues.

1. She attacked the previous posters who criticized Obama. "We were crossing the line". Wth??

Rule number one in dealing with grown folks is that the only person whom you can change is you. If she had simply stated a difference of opinion vs invading a space and telling others what to think and feel i.e. disrespecting others' points of view, she may have been received differently.


Just an aside Julia M. - when you do your job and your supervisor tells you that you are not performing well enough/to their expectations is that bashing? Or criticism? The people of this country elected a man to do a job. Meditate.



2. She was full of insults!


Insult A:

"Stop acting like white people, thinking because you have someone in the white house they are suppose do what you say."

This comment is so loaded. There is the obvious as I mentioned in my previous post, but then she is trying to enforce some unnatural/abnormal/dysfunctional race loyalty/solidarity in here with this garbage.

Translation: BW turn off your common sense 'cause we never demand reciprocity, stand up for ourselves, or give with strings attached- only white people do that. “We’s black” - so get back in that box and act like it.

Aphrodite said...

Insult B:

"I'm really trying to do something new, in all the years I've been married and with my husband, I've really avoid blogs like this."


Why? Are BWE Blogs the plague- to be avoided? Do their webpages contain swine flu? Why would anyone volunteer to help a woman who admits that she regularly avoids you?



Insult C:

"Sadly I'm not a follower and I won't jump on your "Criticize Barack" boat."


Was anyone recruiting for a cult? LOL Does she realize that no one expects for her to be a follower as that is the antithesis of what the BWE movement is about or cares if she likes or doesn't like Barack?


Insult D:

"Like I said this was just an experiment, I've never been on blogs aimed towards Interracial Dating and clearly I know why."

So BWE/IR is an experiment to her…just something to try. Nothing to be taken seriously.

Insult E:

"My expectations of the African American women on here was clearly very high."

How can you have expectations for someone else that you don’t hold for yourself? What you really mean is: I am in a tizzy because I wanted to show my backside, have everyone kiss it, and get over on somebody. Free gub’mint cheese for everybody!


The killer is that she claims not to know that she is insulting and disrespectful...


"I am coming in a respectful manner, I'm not cursing or writing in "CAPS"."

Because you know those are the only two ways a person can be disrespectful. :)

Is Julia M just that stupid? Or does she think that we are?


Then after all these insults she holds out her hand for "help"! LOL
I think this is what Khadija blogged about concerning underclass entitlement issues.


"I've been looking for a little comfort and since I saw you gave birth not too long ago. I figure this will be good for me.”


All about Julia's comfort. Nevermind that Sara just gave birth as she said and may be dealing with whatever she is dealing with. Yet there is the demand for Sara to put her issues and needs aside and automatically cater to her because she said so.

Aphrodite said...

"...we're thinking about getting a counselor but I'd rather find an alternative way that doesn't involve our wallets being hit."


Translation: I'd pay someone else, but I'd rather use Sara, the woman I am insulting, for free.



"I thought this would be a great place for me to discuss the hardships and my pregnancy with other women who have been pregnant."

Whatever gave this impression? Sara didn't even discuss her own pregnancy on her own blog - what makes Julia M think that she would stop everything and discuss hers?



"Sadly, I didn't get that."

At least she can feel- if only for herself.




"I mean, I also expected you women to be smarter than that since you want to encourage black women to be happier, but I guess that's wrong."


Ok Respect, so you have insults and entitlement issues too. Would you even recognize “smart” if you saw it? Guilt won’t work. No one owes you anything.



"What about the women who birthed those black men you call damaged beyond repair? Don't you think they're hurt by what you say? Or the sisters and aunts of those men."


Are these women hurt and ashamed about what these men do to other women and black communities?? If a woman gave birth to a murderer, rapist, pedo, or a man without self respect and racial pride then it is what it is.

My sympathy lies with the victims actual and potential - which are BW and girls. Seems to me a mother, aunt, sister should be more ashamed about her son, or nephew etc BEING a rapist, batterer, or murderer of BW and children. Or waging psychological warfare on BW and girls bc he has no racial pride. Being hurt and ashamed by someone calling a spade a spade is the least of her concerns.



"Do you look at your nephews and cousins as damaged beyond repair? What about your fathers?"


If it is applicable- um yes. Because they are the ones closest to me and can do me the most damage. So if they exhibited DBR behaviors why wouldn't I identify and remove myself from them?

"Were your mothers mammies for loving them?"


No one gets a pass. If a mother supports deviants and deviant behaviors then she gets the same treatment.




"Was she a mammy when she gave birth to you?"

Of course not. Most BW are raised to be the best our race has to offer. :)



"God made people, not statistics. So don't generalise all men like that because it is really mean."


Respect, you need to go somewhere with that hug a thug - stop hurting my feelings - so I can devour you garbage.




"thanks. you women deserve respect, but you do have to give it first. :)"


You're welcome and no, we don't have to extend it first. The only thing we have to do is get old, stay black, pay taxes, and die. Everything else is negotiable.

This must be another one of those mindless black slogans that you have no clue as to the real meaning of and just thought it’s be cute to throw it in a sentence for effect. Respect is earned.

You are a guest here as was JM. You both came to Sara’s house showing your backsides, and JM with her hand out on top of that. The thing is JM probably could a found a mother here on the blog to mentor her or on another one - had she acted like a decent human being.

Anonymous said...

Julia M.'s grammar issues (e.g. inappropriate capitalization: "I can't say I know many Black Women in Interracial Relationships") reminds me of the writing style of that poster who liked to call BW "black barbarians" and pretended it was a compliment.

tired said...

First of all, I would like to commend Beyonce for allowing Taylor to give her speech, after ignorant Kanye interrupted her. I agree with Selena, Beyonce is not a very good role model for bw, but what she did that night was very classy.

Secondly, I find it hard for me to get upset about the uproar over a young ww being supported by so many people. Let Kanye and other bm defend themselves against the women they help keep on the pedestal. I thought ww were God's gift to them, I thought ww were perfect, feminine, and beautiful. Let them deal with their problems. In the words of a commentator on a past post, "They will get fed up with some ww and try to run back to bw, but it will be too late. Bw will be busy loving the men who loves them". They will not wait around being the highest percent of single women.

Let them boil in their mess. They help keep ww on a pedestal and insult bw, but when the perfect beauty turns on them, they run back to the same bw, they insulted, for help...not me!

Carib.girl said...

First I have to say, AMAZING comments Aphrodite. You are so right. You had me rolling on the floor.


"My sympathy lies with the victims actual and potential - which are BW and girls. Seems to me a mother, aunt, sister should be more ashamed about her son, or nephew etc BEING a rapist, batterer, or murderer of BW and children. Or waging psychological warfare on BW and girls bc he has no racial pride. Being hurt and ashamed by someone calling a spade a spade is the least of her concerns."

Amen!!!!!!!!!! You are on point.

"If it is applicable- um yes. Because they are the ones closest to me and can do me the most damage. So if they exhibited DBR behaviors why wouldn't I identify and remove myself from them?"

You are right once again. That is why I cut all ties with my brother. I distance myself from him. He is prejudice, just like my father, who I cut ties with also.
They had a problem with a white guy I was dating, when I was 19. I didn't hesitate to cut them from my life. I don't care if we're family. I don't deserve to be disrespected by racist hypocrites (my father believes bm can date whomever they want, but bw must stay put). My father did not have my best interest at heart. He would laugh, and nudge me, when ANY (damaged, unintelligent) bm tried to talk to me (as long as they were black), but if a white guy was attracted to me (didn't matter if they were college educated, decent and financially stable), and wanted to talk to me (which happens a lot); he would look at them as if he wanted to kill them.

I'm glad they're out of my life.

p.s. How is everything going with the family Sara?

Aphrodite said...

Thank you Carib and congratulations to you for taking care of yourself! Hats off to your strength!

Selena said...

Lawd Aphrodite...I know I need to have my tail in the bed but you had me rolling:

Respect, you need to go somewhere with that hug a thug - stop hurting my feelings - so I can devour you garbage.

This must be another one of those mindless black slogans that you have no clue as to the real meaning of and just thought it’s be cute to throw it in a sentence for effect. Respect is earned.


Girl why can't you let Respectmypeople be great?

LOL and CTFU!!

Jen said...

African-American women have to first distance themselves from most African-American men/people who are worthless to their lives. Mate and marry ONLY worthy men. People will begin noticing our self-respect/value, then we'll get the support and protection other groups of women get.

Love your blog, btw, Sara!

Carib.girl said...

Thank you Aphrodite. I really do enjoy reading your witty comments.


Selena, I hear ya. I tried to go to bed last night, but my stomach was in pain from all the laughing I did, after reading some of Aphrodite's comments. She makes very good points, but it's hilarious at the same time.

Harmony said...

@ Aphrodite

That's true.

Another thing: why is it when a black girl is quiet, non-blacks feel scared of you?

This happened to me yesterday and it upset me.

Lisa-just-Lisa said...

I have to jump in and send a shout out to Aphrodite and Alienati0n for the satire they interject. I get such a kick out of the witty but always thought provoking comments… I am still laughing about the manboys on little girl bikes and fuzzy mittens! I saw a grown man on a miniature bike sans training wheels just the other day… talk about a hot mess yuck!

Sara kudos to you for doing what you do; I don't know how you juggle so much including managing the trolls and detractors while consistently producing a quality blog, but thank you.

Aphrodite said...

Hello Selena, Carib, and Lisa,


Thank you. Glad to interject some humor into some pretty heavy yet necessary conversations. :)

Aphrodite said...

@ Harmony

"Another thing: why is it when a black girl is quiet, non-blacks feel scared of you?

This happened to me yesterday and it upset me."


I am not exactly sure. I think a quiet BG/BW can be unnerving to both some Whites and Blacks.

Blacks because you are not being a caricature of yourself and siding with the acting black crew who have really twisted notions of what being black is.

And some Whites maybe for some of the same reasons. I have met some nonblacks whom I know had these expectations of me - who assumed I would respond in a certain way to a specific situation - and they just ended up disappointed.


I am a real introvert in RL. So I empathize with you.

Aphrodite said...

Jen said...

"African-American women have to first distance themselves from most African-American men/people who are worthless to their lives. Mate and marry ONLY worthy men. People will begin noticing our self-respect/value, then we'll get the support and protection other groups of women get."



I think you have a point here. I am thinking about the times that I have had nonBM extend protectiveness towards me - individually. I got the impression that they saw me as female first and my gender trumped race in those instances.


I know that it was said above that BW probably won't get the extensive collective protection from other men and I agree, but I do think that something can happen over time. I am not suggesting that anyone wait until that happens, but we can always get the soil ready and plant seeds now.

As you said, if BW distance themselves from the DBRs, choose quality, and can stop other sabotaging BW - who enjoy shooting themselves in the foot - we may be able to attempt to turn the tide in our favor.


I am specifically thinking of Asian women and how they are handling themselves.

arthur said...

.. I got the impression that they (nonBM) saw me as female first and my gender trumped race in those instances..

That's the right impression. As a group we are brought up to offer protection to 'decent women'; that is, women who are basically lady-like in their behavior.

It's actually part of something larger; we're brought up to offer protection to all members of 'our group' who can't protect themselves ... women, children, sometimes even other men. But behavior is the key; that's how a person self-identifies as a member of our group. Seeing one of 'us' under duress will automatically trigger the protection response.

Anonymous said...

@ Harmoney and Aphrodite...

Just this past summer, I was working temporarily at a local casino and I too experienced the, Why is she so quite question.
The ww who was training me tried to give me so much hell and I think she just wanted to be "queen of hill." She continously went behind my back to the wm supervisors telling them things about me.
Long story short, I proved myself to be a good employee and one of the wm supervisors shoke my hand and looked me directly in the eyes and told me to come back and visit. That particular supervisor was a close friend of the ww who was training me and at one point he too was giving me a hard way to go. I later realized he was showing support for his ww friend.

Another wm supervisor had told me that he only dates aw and his father had asked him, "Will you ever bring home a ww?" His reply to his father, No. Mike gave me a big hug before I left.
That particular casino differently had some racial undertones and I am happy that I left that mess behind.
A.

Anonymous said...

Do I dare be the first to mention Khloe Kardashain confirmed on her blog that she is indeed getting married to Lamar on Sunday!

Even Conan O'Brien was making fun of Lamar for marrying Khloe. You see even most quality wm would not marry this woman; but, a bm would marry her.

They are marrying on a Sunday? Well, either probably does not attend a church or whatever so why not on a Sunday.

A.

Anonymous said...

@ Sara...I found this channel on Youtube and the site owner stated the following:
THIS CHANNEL IS DEDICATED TO SHOWCASING THOSE SHOCKING, UNCOUTH, OUT-OF-CONTROL, SASSY, QUICK-TO-VIOLENCE, ATTITUDINAL BLACK WOMEN FROM AMERICA.

http://www.youtube.com/user/SEBLKWOMAN5

I think this woman is African and she even has a wm subscribing to her channel. The guy is a racist.

I have to admit I really do not know what to think of this woman. Every video she has is a negative towards AA women. Her attitude towards AA women is one reason why my attitude towards Africans in general is changing to a negative one.
Yes, there are a small percentage of African women that are living an upperclass life style. But, the majority of them are not. One bm said, "I see bw are hurting, lol keep up the good work." What?

lois

Anonymous said...

You see even most quality wm would not marry this woman; but, a bm would marry her.
----

Well, she's not Black, you see...and in the tiny minds of DBR Negro males anything they can manage to scavenge up that's not Black instantly becomes prime wife material.

I personally wish them several weeks of wedded bliss.

Anonymous said...

Here is a clip of Oprah suggesting that bw should date/marry out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tpH8pkz3iow&feature=related

lois

cinquetta said...

I love coming to your blog. You open my eyes I did not know Dr. Dre assult a woman. I did not hear it on the news or even DL Hughley comment about the first lady. Your blog has insightful intelligent
informative acticles. Thank you for staying up to date with the world behavior.

Anonymous said...

Most of these BM athletes tend to marry non BW that most succesful WM would never even look at. When I heard Kendra(Heff's ex GF) married a black athlete I was SO not surprised! Oh and I also heard that Lil Wayne got ANOTHER woman pregnant apart from his other TWO baby mamas this year.Some video model.SMH!

Anonymous said...

Some of these athletes can learn from Drew Brees and the Manning boys. They carry themselves very well and very little controversy.

A.

Lisa-just-Lisa said...

I don't care about these celebrity clowns and their made for reality TV antics. Like my grandma likes to say "they ain't even worth talkin' about"

Aphrodite said...

"But behavior is the key; that's how a person self-identifies as a member of our group."

Thank you Arthur, you have given me much to think about.

Aphrodite said...

@ A Anon

"The ww who was training me tried to give me so much hell and I think she just wanted to be "queen of hill." She continously went behind my back to the wm supervisors telling them things about me."

My longest situation where I unnerved a ww occurred somewhat similarly. I got the impression that towards the end she was intentionally trying to provoke me - which never worked.

I am sure she badmouthed me as well, but I think that was a pretty consistent character flaw of hers. She would reveal the most intimate details about herself. She told me she was an ex heroin addict (as if it were yesterday - it was 30 years ago - I hope) and then told me she had hepatitis, but only AFTER she had run the risk of exposing me and others to infection through careless handling of sharp objects. She also told me that her son had mono, her daughter in law was a former stripper and she never loved her husband, but they have a lot of mutual respect for one another... I could go on.

Then she wanted to know why I was 'distant/cold' with her. LOL

I just wrote her off as scum and I vow to never let that happen again.

Aphrodite said...

@ Lois

I know that was directed towards Sara, but if the African woman is unnerving you then I highly suggest that you read Khadija's posts regarding this issue. She knew how to handle nonAA's who were enemies of BW and BW Empowerment very well.

In my opinion this woman is no different than a DBRBM.

artistcr1962 said...

Harmony - I know what you mean, I have been quiet most of my life and I was so tired of hearing "You're so quiet", why are you so quiet?"
I really do think a lot of non-black women think that all black women are loud and brass. I had one job, there was a quiet white woman working there and not once did anyone question why she was quiet, but I had to hear it day in and day out. I got to the point to reply "Really, I never knew I was quiet, thanks for telling me". I also feel some people are intimidated by a quiet person - they do not know what to make of you and it makes *them* nervous. Instead of just coming to work and doing you job, some people have to try to form cliques. I am 47 years old and I do not hear it as much as I have gotten older, but when I was younger it drove me batty.

Anonymous said...

Is anyone going to watch Ms. America 2004, Ericka and her huband Brian on that CBS game show The Amazing Race?
lois

sistrunkqueen said...

Sorry to inject but I have to tell you all this story.
I went to CVS tonight to pick up some snacks. I got my purchases and left. As I was leaving the store and walking toward my car an older black man was following me. He was on my blind side. I have my purse on my shoulder and my shopping bag in my other hand. He walks to the side of me and says oh hello. He had an accent. He walked right up to my car door and had the nerve to say Can you give me .20 cents? I said Why didn't you ask the white people for money ? as I was getting into my car. He said Because I was inside of the store and he saw me he decided to ask a sister for money. I told him that I am not your sister. I closed my door and drove off. He had a cell phone but he needs .20 cents! why would a grown ass man ask me for .20 cents and admit to stalking?
Why didn't this snaggle tooth ragamuffin ask the white folks for some money? It 's disgusting!

Just had to vent Sorry

Taylor-Sara said...

Girl, it's ok. I'm so glad you didn't open your purse! I seriously doubt he was after only 20 cents. Had you opened your purse in front of him, you might have gotten your head busted, and your purse snatched!
I remember a few years ago, I was in my sister's neighborhood 'the hood', and some bm bum asked me for 'change'. At first I felt kind of sorry for him, for he genuinely seemed to be down on his luck, and was very complimentary ( I now know this is just a ruse with them) Anyway, I was wearing a gray summer dress that had a pocket in the front. I knew I had put a few dollars from my last purchase in the pocket, so rather than open my purse in front of this man, I handed him the 4-5 dollars from the pocket. I was expecting him to be grateful and say thank you since he only asked for change, but he just stood there staring at me with an expectant look on his face. I turned to get into my new car, and he snapped. "So you can afford a new car but can't give me the damn change!" I stared at him incredulously. All traces of his former 'niceness' were gone. "Sure, I'll give you some change." I quipped. " Just give that back" I held out my hand for the dollars. He glared at me, and stalked away. Now this man asked for change-he claimed to get something to eat. I instead, gave him 4-5 dollars, and he had the nerve to be pissed that I didn't include the change with it! Some of these fools are unbelievable...

Anonymous said...

@ Aphrodite (7:32)

As much as she talked about me to those supervisors never once did I lost my temper.
I simply chose not to give into her bad behavior and reading Sara's and other BWE blogs helped alot. Thanks ladies.

The Trainer also stated things such as: "Oh, I left my husband who btw was not cheating on me nor was he abusive. I simply fell out of love with him." In addition, she said that her husband never asked her why she left. Oh, my goodness. The guy was so happy she left he could careless about the reason.

But, dumb dumb aka the trainer did not think before she moved out of her house. A friend of hers was sharing a house with two other women and the friend invited her to be the fourth woman and now she(trainer) cannot stand the thought of being with three other women. Ms. Trainer works a full and parttime job and still cannot afford to live alone. Still, Dumb Dumb refuses to go back to her husband and she is totally miserable and wants everybody to be miserable like her. I soon realized why Ms. Trainer used to asked me questions about my living arrangements.

A.

Aphrodite said...

@ Sistrunkqueen

Wow. I am glad that you are ok. He sounds like he was up to something.

I really think that businesses need to be aware of things like this and do things to keep these types away.

The Writer, The Actress said...

Anon
Do I dare be the first to mention Khloe Kardashain confirmed on her blog that she is indeed getting married to Lamar on Sunday!

Even Conan O'Brien was making fun of Lamar for marrying Khloe. You see even most quality wm would not marry this woman; but, a bm would marry her.

They are marrying on a Sunday? Well, either probably does not attend a church or whatever so why not on a Sunday.

A.




Kim Kardishian sent one of her "peoples" to "command" Gerard Butler to come to her. He politely said, "no thank you". Even ole Gerry knows better. I guess she thought her big rear would gett'im. lol.

energize said...

@ aphrodite and artist1962 http://theblackfactor.blogspot.com/a recent essay was just written discussing problems and solutions to your simlar work related issues.


Sara if you feel the information will help others.

Anonymous said...

Yes I did watch Amazing Race. I was rooting for them all the way. Go Erica and Brian!!!!

Anonymous said...

lol!I had to laugh at the Kim Kardashian thing. I have to say though, I didnt think Gerard Butler was her type!Or maybe she wanted publicity.These Kardashian girls would do anything for fame.

XaiXai said...

@sistrunkqueen.
Be careful sis, this has also happened to me. Anyway, I never give black men money, I'm a strict practitioner of reciprocity. I only give black women money. R/black males; I have a 10 foot boundary, in fact I gauge everyone at the 10 foot mark to determine if I need to take evasive action. It's instinctual from growing up in Chicago, New York and Philadelphia. It has saved my life more than once!! I escaped to Seattle years ago. Luckily black males rarely speak to a black woman here, especially if there's a non black woman breathing nearby. Shucks, nowadays if a black male speaks to me I automatically check to see:
if my legs are open
if my blouse is open
if my mouth is open
if my purse is open

Xai

Taylor-Sara said...

Luckily black males rarely speak to a black woman here, especially if there's a non black woman breathing nearby. Shucks, nowadays if a black male speaks to me I automatically check to see:
if my legs are open
if my blouse is open
if my mouth is open
if my purse is open

Xai, that was too funny!

Harmony said...

To aphrodite ad those who addressed the queit thing.

Thanks for telling me your stories about this because I thought I was the only one who went through this.

sistrunkqueen said...

XaiXai and others thanks for the advise. I think I handled it ok. I just didn't like the sneaky way he did that thing. He asked me with a straight face for .20 cents. I have nothing against West indian black men, but usually they stay away from us black americans and for one to ask me for any money was odd.
@xai xai I was in Seattle in march girl and it was such a beautiful place As a matter of fact I got a few mens attention at the airport and mall. It was too cold for me. My college friend lives there and wants to leave ASAP because black men ignore her. I told her date out girl! She is still single.

tlynn said...

Well if we gonna tell stories: Just today this dude wanted to speak to me real quick and I said I was in a hurry (because just from the look of him I knew he wasn't up to no good, but giving the benefit of the doubt...I listened...)I thought he wanted directions...but OH NO...he said he was actually a Prince and he was worth a trillion dollars and that he was on the dollar bill in his country. I glanced at that fool and held my hand up and said "NO! Uhnt un!" he stopped and actually looked surprised then he was like oh okay...and kept it moving. Now I have to say that his little "rap" has worked on some women before...and that's the shame of it all...

Aphrodite said...

Thank you Energize!

No problem Harmony. :)

S said...

" Harmony said...

Another thing: why is it when a black girl is quiet, non-blacks feel scared of you?
"

As someone mentioned before me: a quiet BG is intimidating and makes some people nervous.
Isn't that both sad and laughable at the same time?
I'm very quiet myself...a bit shy perhaps but i don't like to talk too much and rather speak when i have something to say.
People have commented on this and say that i come off as arrogant.
Now if there is one thing i dislike ALOT, it's arrogance.
sometimes people take advantage of me being quiet and a bit shy because they think that makes me a doormat which i am not and they soon figure it out for themselves which also leads them to become annoyed with me.
Also, when you don't act like your given stereotype some people feel uncomfortable and uneasy because it goes against everything they've believed about "your kind" .
Someone once said that if a non black person understands you are on the same level as them, they don't know how to act , they feel much more comfortable with a black person that needs their help or is "lower" than them.

If anything i would advice more black girls to be quiet and not give out too much information about themselves, don't confuse that with suppressing your feelings or being quiet when dbr behaviour is around you though, since that is when you should be at your loudest!

Deb said...

I agree wholeheartedly, Sara. My brother and I were talking about this (and have been for a few weeks) and HE actually said the same thing you did about the Don Imus thing. BLACK people were enraged about his comments...not mainstream society. I've read a few of the comments written in response to this post, and yes, Obama's comment was supposed to be off the record, but, yes, he's supposed to be ABOVE an award show. White women are put on a pedestal, and like someone commented earlier, we as black women will not be put on a pedestal as long as black men disregard us. Love & Peace, Deb

Anonymous said...

"I think this woman is African and she even has a wm subscribing to her channel. The guy is a racist.

I have to admit I really do not know what to think of this woman. Every video she has is a negative towards AA women. Her attitude towards AA women is one reason why my attitude towards Africans in general is changing to a negative one."

-----------
for whatever reason i cannot open the video; but are you sure it's even a woman? i also more or less dislike africans (the sheer hatred these folks have for African-Americans is scary), but DBRBM like to pose as black women so which is why i'm asking.

Anonymous said...

@ anonymoust 11:26 am
You pc maybe preventing you from opening the video and you could be right.

A.

Anonymous said...

@ anony. alot of A. are working under the radar and most of us have no idea what is going on with them because they keep their real personal business amongst themselves. Now, that is a good idea. Learn to keep your mouths shut more often when it comes to your personal business.

A.

XaiXai said...

@Taylor-Sara

Ha! A girls got to keep herself buttoned up in this neck of the woods.

@sistrunkqueen

You go girl, Seattle is a great place for IR. Vancouver, BC is even better because of the influx of Euro men there AND the lack of bm there, so no interference or rude remarks which can sometimes happen in Seattle. It's too bad your college friend is unaware of the gold mine that she inhabits. I'll pray for her enlightenment.

News Flash: With the winter Olympics in Vancouver there will be a b*ttload of YOUNG, STRONG, HEALTHY, BEAUTIFUL MEN FROM AROUND THE WORLD IN THE SEATTLE/VANCOUVER AREA!!! Take advantage ladies. I AM!!!!

Xai

Anonymous said...

@ Xai, Now that was a GREAT IDEA going to the winter Olympics. Just go to Vancouver you do not have to attend any games.

A.

Taylor-Sara said...

The trick is to go where the kind of man you are looking for is likely to frequent. IOWs if you like the bookworm type, try the library. If you like the sporty type, try whatever sport you're interested in, as well as all the things that might accompany it. 'games, clubs, memberships etc.' Hockey, Polo, and Gulf can ALWAYS be counted on to have an enormous number of wm. They seem to gravitate toward these particular sports. And somene was telling me that she went to a (I think she said Hockey) game, and there were several bg/bw there, and every single one of them was with a wb/wm. Smiling happily.

Now keep in mind this is not the place for Sha-nene and her loud talking, cursing, profane, and angry crew. This is the place for College bound, classy, book-smart Tameka, and her college bound crew. I would certainly hope that She-nene would not go, we don't need anymore image-assassinations. Good luck ladies, and let me know how your endeavors are going....

Anonymous said...

I totally agree with you Sara. Let the Sha-nene's of the world continue to follow the NBA AND NFL players around like lap dogs.
As a yg, I never was one who enjoyed much football or basketball. Maybe it was the type of boys/men who were playing that turned me off and today I know its the men that turn me off.

A.

Anonymous said...

Now keep in mind this is not the place for Sha-nene and her loud talking, cursing, profane, and angry crew. This is the place for College bound, classy, book-smart Tameka, and her college bound crew.

So in other words, this is a place for a small minority of black women.

Taylor-Sara said...

Very funny Anon.
But the majority of bw are NOT Sha nene's! 2/3 of all college degrees being awarded, are going to bw! Around 70+ percent of all bp buying homes are bw! And nearly 70 percent of all new businesses started by bp are being started by bw! Does it sound like the majority of bw are she nene's to you, idiot? So go tell your mess to someone who doesn't know any better. We don't drink the kool aid over here. However, the majority of bm certainly fit the profile of damaged, deranged, and/or dangerous!

Anonymous said...

Last night I went to a church singles dinner at a restaurant.
LOL...everyone paid for their own dinner. One would think between the men and the church they would have paid for the ladies' dinner or at least paid a partion of their dinner.

Of course, their were more bw and then men. So, messy me bought up irr and two of the ladies said they had no problem with it. Then the first lady changed her mind and said that she could not do it. But, the second lady said she was all for irr. I wanted to tell the first lady with that type of attitude you may will be single for a very long time.

I sat across from two very lovely ladies. One of the ladies was telling me about a bm from the church and he told her that she may as well take him because she cannot do any better.
LOL...this young woman is intelligent, educated, childless and buying her own home. She said they both attended the same gym. One evening he phoned her while she was at the gym and told her that he was outside waiting for her so that he could walk her to her car. She said she told him that was not necessary and she would be OK. She told me that she was not going to allow him to follow her home and she waited 45 minutes before she felt safe enough to go home. After, that situation she did not return to that gym. She too does not have any problems with irr. The numbers of bw who are into irr are growing.

A.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Taylor-Sara said...

Whatever Dana, how about this. How about you believe whatever the hell you want to ok? I don't have time to dispute non issues that have already been long established...

Dana said...

Truth hurts don't it, LOL?

Taylor-Sara said...

What truth Dana/ Troll?
This is the truth.


JBHE has consistently documented the fact that black women hold a large lead over black men in almost every facet of higher education. Black women currently earn about two thirds of all African-American bachelor's degree awards, 70 percent of all master's degrees, and more than 60 percent of all doctorates. Black women also hold a majority of all African-American enrollments in law, medical, and dental schools.

Looking exclusively to undergraduate higher education, the latest Department of Education figures show that black women account for 63.6 percent of all African-American enrollments.





Twenty-six of the 30 highest-ranked universities responded to our survey. Those institutions that declined to provide black enrollment data by gender were Wake Forest University, the University of Pennsylvania, the University of Southern California, and Carnegie Mellon University.
Black women make up a very large 71.7 percent of all African-American enrollments at Emory University in Atlanta. This is the largest black gender gap among the 26 universities in our survey. Also, black women are 68.1 percent of the African-American enrollments at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. At Berkeley, Northwestern, and Cornell, black women make up a larger percentage of the total African-American enrollments than the national average, which as stated earlier is 63.6 percent.

But at the vast majority of high-ranking universities, the black student gender gap is less pronounced than the national average. However, it must be pointed out again that in almost all cases, black women substantially outnumber black men at these institutions

Anonymous said...

We Black females RULE higher education! Holla!

Anonymous said...

Yeah I don't know what Dana is talking about but if the argument that BW don't have education versus the black men? Are you serious? Please. BM are not high on education as it is. BW HAVE to be in order to get to where they need to because most likely they are heads of the household. Go on dana with that nonsense. Utter nonsense!

Carib.girl said...

Ummm...Dana or maybe it's Damon, most bm would rather take the short cut by playing sports, and making a trashy, uneducated woman their wife, than use their cranium. I go to college, and where I attend, I rarely see a bm...seriously! BUT, I do see a lot of bw.
Now, if you attend the "University of Jail" (not Yale) or PENitentiary State (not Penn State) they are the majority...AND counting!!!


BYE! Troll...

ak said...

Anonymous:

i would also like to add that the whole degradation of the bw and bm not protecting/support bw stems from shame/embarassment over bw as group. Bm as a collective have been brainwashed due to racism/white supremacism to be ashamed of bw and feel we are worthless and not worthy of protection. the only reason they jumped to the defense (some bm) for the imus situation was because it bruised their ego. no one wants to believe the women within their culture are the least attractive (ofcourse bw are not the least attractive, we are gorgeous and just as beautiful as any woman) but the world has brainwashed so many weak-minded individuals who are black and male to believe we are ugly and worthless that it seems like a waste to protect us...that's what its about...



Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah right. Whatever. but you know what let's put this 'bm are always brainwashed into something' scenario up against another scenario, just to have some fun OK?

Back in the day, say no more than five decades ago, the great American stereotype and 'brainwashing' from wm AND ww was that bm were out to 'rape all ww and wg, so let's just kill all these n-words right now to protect white womanhood's purity'. Right? Is everybody familiar with reading or hearing about that time in history?

Well then how come bw didn't take that stereotyping and horrid brainwashing about the bm and go and run with it? How come bw never locked their doors at night barring the way for bm to come in? Why did bw continue to mix and mingle with bm the horrisble brute and rapist with uncontrollable sexual urges?

BM just let a brainwashing just happen to them about US? The bw who look like their mothers, grandmothers, and sisters? Bm just 'let' everyone say and believe bw are unworthy because of the media's images of ww? Puh-leeeease negro! Then how come we didn't do the same when bw all grew up with the same images of the dashing leading Hollywood wm in the movies and on TV? I mean yeah there's Denzel and Taye Diggs, but there will ALWAYS be a dashing George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise etc. and there were Gregory Peck, Clark Gable, Cary Grant, Frank Sinatra, and Dean Martin before all of them!

Yet how come bw didn't drop all of the bm and run after all of the wm because of the embarassing rapist, brutal, uncontrollable bm?

Huh? Explain THAT one to me man!

chelpete said...

Hi Sara, thank you for having your blogs on this site, because of you I've chosen to start a blogger page of my own....I also have mentioned you in one of my posts, because I've become so inspired by your courage! I enjoy coming to your page and reading your blogs, they are so informative and thought provoking...being in an interracial marriage, I can see from the other side, too that it's not just ww/bm that have confrontation, it's ANYONE that chooses to love a soul and not see a skin tone. Thanks, thank you, thankers!
-Chelsea Peterson

EmoFlo2K11 said...

When I saw that incident on TV, I went straight to YouTube, b/c I knew there a racial war going on. And you're right. I lot of people, especially racist jumped to her rescue. Yeah, I thought that was very stupid of Kanye to do that to her and quite embarrassing for Taylor, but she wasn't have stood there and took that crap from him. She stood have held on tight to that trophy or something. She was like 20 yrs old when it happened.

I don't have anything against ww either, but I have notices the same thing too. Reading this made me think about this question I asked on Yahoo! Answers a couple of years ago. I asked, why do white people (in this case white women) get more attention in the media if they go missing or something tragic happens to them? Why don't minorities (or minority women) get that same attention? People were so fired up by question. Some even called me a racist. I wasn't trying to be racist or anything. It was just a pattern that I notice. Whenever something happens to a ww, they talk about it for years. Whenever something happens to a minority, it gets talked about for a month or two, at the most (which rarely happens). Or it just get swept under the rug.