Black beauty through the eyes of white and black men....

These are typical choices for BM, but look what WM are choosing.....

All happily married (dark) sistas, whom we KNOW bm would NEVER have considered 'wife material'.....

Count Ferdinand and wife Mary...

I think the pictures speak for themselves. Lets talk about what black beauty means to bm, then we will talk about what it means to wm.

You can turn on any show, or go anywhere and see bw being discriminated against by bm. Many women have written me crying, and bemoaning this issue, and asking me why bm only seem to find light skinned/mixed/white women attractive. I will tell you, but it is going to piss some of you off, so be forewarned. When it comes to bm the majority are puppets who refuse to think for themselves. They are coonified, and will celebrate, glorify, and uphold anything resembling white. For decades women who looked like Vanessa Williams and Jane Kennedy were put on a pedestal because they looked like a darker version of a ww. Now don't get me wrong, I love these women, they are not the issue at all. Please understand that. The issue is that bm are openly discriminating against dark bw, and more often than not ANY bw nowadays. BM will deny this of course. They will claim it's just a preference or that dark skinned women are unattractive or have attitudes. Or that bw are imagining things, and we cannot beleive our lying eyes (lol) But I'm sure you all have seen the evidence and know that we are not dreaming. Of course bw were blamed for them wanting any-and everything non-black. Y'all know if they don't prefer bw-it's OUR FAULT (LOL). Our hair was too short and nappy, our skin too dark or the black was showing if we were light. Our African-like features made them want to gag! The point is dark women have been made to feel unattractive and 2nd best by bm on an ongoing basis for years. This is why the collective self esteem of your average bw is tetering on low.
But my feeling on this is that one man's cast off is another man's dream girl. Stop crying about bm making derisive remarks about dark women/blk women and simply MOVE ON! Don't waste time on men who would disrespect, demean or waste your life. Life is just too precious and short to waste. (IOWs), if bm don't find you attractive -find men who do. It's not rocket science. If you listen to a man, and watch his actions-he will let you know who he is.

The truth is many bm are jealous of wm and their success and power in this country. They want nothing more than to PRETEND that they are the ideal man in America and play the part. You see this with bm who insist that their women have long hair, and skin as light as they can possible get it. This not only demonstrates a deep seated hostility and disdain for one's own self, it also does not bode well for how he sees the woman. (She usually ends up being treated like an accessory-he wears for special occasions.) He can be as black as tar but if she's darker than summer tan, she's not suitable for anything but a booty call. I see bw still allowing themselves to be used for booty calls by bm everyday. While crying and wondering why he won't treat them with love and respect. I will tell you why. Because you are not respecting yourself! You must love yourself enough to get the hell away from ppl who will use up your time, your body, and your life, and then marry a bright/non blk/white woman!

I want you to take a look at the upper pictures. All of these dark sistas are being loved and cherished by wm. What do you think their chances for marriage would have been, had they waited for a bm???

When is the last time you saw a bm marry a sista who looks like ANY of these dark sistas above, unless she was came with a trust fund, or some other high incentive for him to use? One of these wm is a very wealthy Count! He married his wife Mary and made her a Countess! They have 3 children, a great life and she says he constantly tells her she is beautiful. How many bm do you think have told her that?

The truth is that many bm are discriminating against women who do not fit the phenotype of light/bright and white women. If a woman has to be a certain shade for him to consider even asking her out, then he has shown himself to be shallow, superficial, and oftentimes self denigrating. Black women PLEASE stop trying to fit into the narrow parameters of beauty these pieces -of -men have set up! You will only end up hurt! REAL men want REAL women- not a collection of European Body parts! For many dark women the only time they are told they are beautiful is oftentimes by wp! How pathetic is that. I remember high school and college. I was considered very attractive but I often felt that it was more because I made no apologies for my color. I'm dark, and love my chocolate skin. I never felt less than anyone, or wished to be any other color. When I made Mayday queen of my school, many girls were shocked, and some even had tears in their eyes. This was surprising to me until I really thought it over. It wasn't about the stupid plastic sector, they gave me or the fake silver crown. It wasn't about those things at all. It was because I was dark. See they were so used to being in 2nd-3rd and 4th place, they could not fathom a dark Mayday queen. But because I won, they felt a little higher....

When bm tried the "you're so pretty to be so dark crap"-I always walked away.I always let them know I was not going to put up with that crap. In fact, what I loved about the wm, is that I never heard the "to be dark" part with them. They would simply say "You're so pretty...." I think many sistas can relate to that. It was like a breath of fresh air! I didn't have to hear about why was I wearing my long hair up, instead of down? Why did I sometimes wear a weave? Why did I wear lip gloss? (lip gloss makes big lips look bigger-and my lips are big) I think the best thing about wm is simply that they have an appreciation for black beauty, that bm have long ago lost! *if they ever had it*

Many women have written and told me that since they have been dating/engaged/married to wm, this is the first time they feel beautiful! That he appreciates their afro-centric features and loves their hair, skin, nose etc. They are shocked because they have been told for years that wm only want bw for sex and do NOT find them attractive. Ladies this is pure programming. Liken it to the matrix, where reality is not what it seems but most bw are unaware... Many sistas think they must stay with a bm out of loyalty or necessity. Lets address that. When it comes to loyalty, it must be a two way street! It's really as simple as that! Let me tell you ladies a little secret. Relationships are like scales. They MUST balance.

Case in point: I knew someone who was dating a fairly wealthy man. He was loving and kind, and quite generous. He would go out of his way for her, and often bought her very expensive items, pretty much anything she wanted. The problem was he loved home cooked meals, and she hated to cook. She would often complain viciously about him begging for home cooked meals. Yet she quit her job, and had no problem living off of him yet refusing to cook the meals. I told her she should keep working and cook a few meals because the relationship was becoming way too one-sided. She told me I did not know what I was talking about and Jay, (whom she had now moved in with) was fine with the way things were. One day he came in and she was laying in the living room watching a soap opera. The house was dirty, and he had to prepare his own dinner. He stormed around angry for awhile until she asked what his problem was. He then turned and began to berate her laziness, how he was footing ALL of the bills and yet he could not even have a decent looking home (since she moved in ) or get a hot meal. He then began yelling about her 50-60 pair of expensive shoes (bought on his cc) and other expenses. It ended with him asking her to move out! She was shocked and devastated. She could not understand why he wasn't crazy about her like he had been before. I tried to explain to her that even when there are no outward signs of it. People are ALWAYS keeping score. She should have kept her job so she would not look like a free loader, and if she was having him buy all these expensive things for her, she should have cooked those meals once in a while. Nobody likes to feel used...
But I'm way off track. Bottom about that is that there has to be balance....

Now, as I was saying, many sistas are finding that wm appreciate ALL shades of black beauty, and are even more likely to be with darker bw. Now my theory on this is because I think darker bw are often so mistreated in the bc, they are more likely to think "Well, what have I got to lose-they can't treat me worse than I've suffered over here!" This line of thinking leaves them open to 'other men' stepping up to the plate. Also, many wm have noticed that bm disrespect and demean bw with every breath. They have seen bw suffer at the hands of bm at every turn, and they are more and more inclined to take advantage of this situation. Recently, I went to a ball game at my young cousin's school (she goes to a predominantly blk school) I was not surprised to see the young bbs hugged up with white/Latino/Asian girls. What was shocking to me was that the young blk girls were doing the same! It seemed every other bg was with a white/Latino/Asian boy! My cousin's boyfriend (blk boy) was angry and flabbergasted. "When did y'all start stabbing us in the back? " he demanded. I held my breath and waited for her answer. "We're not stabbing anybody in the back" She snapped. "We're just loving the ones who love us back!".....