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Friday, February 27, 2009

Chris Brown and Rihanna, why is SHE being thrown under the bus?...





Chris Brown and Rihanna in happier days.....






I've been following the Chris Brown -Rihanna case, and I must admit to being shocked once again. Just when I thought I could not be shocked anymore by the things that black ppl do. If you ladies go to you tube, you'll see exactly what I am talking about.
It's really sickening, and unbelievable! There is a so-called re-enactment video with a large bg playing Rihanna (Even though Rihanna is very slim, and slightly built) She is in the car with Chris Brown when they begin to argue over a cell phone message from an alleged ex-girlfriend of his. She throws her large body against him and begins to slap him. He becomes angry and retaliates. As soon as he hits her, she then begins to crow triumphantly "I got you now Mother F-----! Her face is bruised and smiling as she tells him how she is going to get even. In the next scene, she is seen with a black eye looking scared and vulnerable (but we all know she is faking victimhood, because we have just seen her crowing triumphantly) The caption reads "Should have kept your hands to yourself!" -this is directed at her NOT HIM!!! WTH! As the movie goes off the words 'We support you Chris Brown' are clearly seen. I was flabbergasted as I watched it. First of all they have no idea what happened in the car, so they made up her attacking him first in order to justify him putting his hands on a woman. Second, they pledged absolutely no support to her, and even went on to imply that the whole thing was her fault! Third, by putting the words "should have kept your hands to yourself ' over her bruised picture, they were implicitly stating that she had gotten what she deserved!
I had to scan more movies because I was too horrified to believe my eyes. In the next one, Rihanna is being called a man, and jokes are being made about how he choked her so hard she passed out! BTW, according to TYT, She did tell the police that he choked her until she lost consciousness, and that they were indeed arguing over a text msg. from another female. She also goes on to say that he punched her, hit her numerous times, and finally choked her, telling her that he was going to kill her.
I watched about 7-8 videos before I was too horrified to look at even one more. In one, 'no air' is being played in revised form with him saying he was going to knock her in her big forehead, and her begging to breathe! It seemed every video made by black ppl was set as a joke! She was being called names and laughed at, at every turn, and NOBODY seemed to be condemning what he did except TYT reporters (Who are WHITE!) They were expressing the outrage that should have been coming from the BC. They kept saying they did not care what she had said to him, he had no business hitting a woman! How come the black community cannot see that? How come we are the ONLY community in which women and children are on their own, and the MEN are protected like little punks? Why haven't we learned that to destroy your women, is to destroy your lineage? According to you tube, both Snoop and Dr Dre have hit women. Snoop, allegedly beat a woman with a shoe, and I am unclear who Dr Dre hit, but one thing is clear. If those women had been white, both Snoop and Dre would be in jail right now, and in the bread lines upon their release. See wp PROTECT their women! They know how valuable the female counterpart of their race is. Yet bp throw theirs under the bus! Not only were blk ppl not livid about what happened to Rihanna, many of them expressed outrage that she would rat CB out!!! Can you say DAMAGED? I'm still shaking my head at the sheer lunacy of all this......
PS. take a love language test in white choc. preferred....

118 comments:

Velvet Queen said...

Oh my goodness! You have no idea how this makes me literally cry. Its horrendous how this sort of behavior can even be tolerated!!!!!!!!!!!

All I know is that since the incident I have not been able to even hear Chris Brown's music the same way again. I just can't. I can't bear to hear it, in a matter of fact I try to be as far away from it as possible.

I WANT TO KNOW WHERE AL SHARPTON IS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry, this just really infuriates me beyond belief. I just...I am just too appalled...I simply don't know what to say...I'm speechless.

Gloria said...

TMZ just reported that they are back together. They said that People magazinne broke the news first.

Just wow.

http://www.tmz.com/2009/02/28/rihanna-and-chris-brown-back-together/

Anonymous said...

Yea, well I am officially severing ties with any so called black community. Period. I advocate for Black women all day every day, but not this so called "community".

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

To be honest, I haven't been following this story that much, for I have been in an abusive relationship once, and looking at this situation brings me back to that moment.

I don't condone physical abuse from anyone, especially from men to women. Luckily, I haven't heard of anyone supporting Chris Brown...that might make me have a flash back and go off.

Anonymous said...

this is just sick. that is why i don't watch anything on YT in reguards to the chris/rihanna incident. it's really disgusting.

as for them getting back together, i'll have to see it to believe it.

rihanna has to understand that if she goes back to him, she's gonna lose endorsements just like chris. it'll be a done deal and she'll end up like whitney houston.gone.

Anonymous said...

I only noticed maybe 1 or 2 bm speaking up in her defense.
Most men will side with each other and especially if they see themselves in Chris's position. Her father should step up and demand that she does not have anything to do with Chris. Yes, I know she is an adult. Adults can have impaired judgement.
And, if they are really together.
I think most police are not incline to agree with the woman if she puts herself back into that type of situation.

Taylor-Sara said...

Exactly Anon. I heard on tv today that they are back together, and that she is saying it's no big deal because he has hit her plenty of times! Can she really be that gullible? And you are right not only will the police be much slower to respond when a woman knowingly puts herself back into the same situation over and over again, but in Ri's case, her career will suffer terribly (the message is just too dangerous for the public to endorse!) He nearly chokes you to death but you forgive him because you love him, what about YOU? Don't you LOVE YOURSELF???

Phoenix Sun said...

'rihanna has to understand that if she goes back to him, she's gonna lose endorsements just like chris. it'll be a done deal and she'll end up like whitney houston.gone.'

More importantly, she's going to wind up dead. I hate to say this, but she's following orders like a good little puppy. This is a clear example that it doesn't matter how much money and privilege one has. She is further victimizing herself and reaffirming that bw must stand by bm no matter what the cost. I'm so frustrated by so many AA women, they're paper tigers when it comes to protecting their own self-interests.

IF it is true she's back with Brown, she and Brown's careers will be segreated to the black community, kind of like when Vanessa Williams was dropped by white America after her naked pictures were revealed (she has now crossed back over many years later). White mainstream outlets won't touch either Brown or Rihanna. It's a shame, Rihanna has truly compromised herself.

Anonymous said...

You ladies are probably right they both may have shorten their careers. Although, Brittany and others are still going along as if they never had any problems.

Anonymous said...

Phoenix

White America isn't going to drop them. White America doesn't care what two black people do to each other. Vanessa Williams simply lost her Ms. America crown. That is it. She lost some endorsements from that, but her singing career took off immediately when she decided to begin it only four years later.

The media attention will probably enhance both of their careers.

Anonymous said...

The lesson learned here is that BW and WOC must protect their own interests and be their own advocates and speak for themselves.

Al Sharpton and the self proclaimed leadership are focused on petty nonsense. This is precisely why White America, collectively does not take AA collectively seriously. I am appalled that no one BM in a position of power with media access, Samuel Jackson, Quincy Jones, Bill Cosby - John Legend, Denzel Washington all well raised supposed men of quality have remained silent and not refuted or loudly and publicly taken a stand on this. Not so much to take sides as it to say this behavior is unacceptable. This is proof that no one can protect, and promote the best interests of BW better than themselves.

Run do not walk away from dysfunctional Bppl and BM and live your best life. Thanks again Sara for this blog with it's persistent, consistent wake up call reminder. If she has indeed made the poor choice to go back to him - this blog is more necessary than ever.

V/r

Clarice

Taylor-Sara said...

thanks for your well versed points Clarice. and Lavette, I cannot tell you how many times I have felt that way. Esp. when I went to yt and heard the horrible things they were saying about her, while giving him a pass -as usual... It's just incredible....

Anonymous said...

This story kills me.

I read so many comments on black sites that made me wanna cry and scream, where do I begin?

First off, people were saying that Rihanna deserved it "because she looks like someone who has an attitude", wtf does that mean? I don't understand how you "look" like you have an attitude, and do they know her personally?

Then I read that they needed to know what happened before forming an opinion. WHO NEEDS TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED? I do NOT need to know because there is NO REASON AT ALL that could justify a man hitting a woman.

I read that Rihanna must have hit him first, let's suppose for a second that it's true and he retaliates. You mean to tell me, he's gonna beat her face like he did, bite her, choke her, in the name of "self-defense"? PLUS Chris doesn't have ONE BRUISE or SCAR, she was the one being sent to the hospital, and people still SWEAR THAT SHE HIT HIM????

Most people on black sites support Chris, even if Kanye, John Legend and Jay-Z openly stated that it was unacceptable. It breaks my heart. Everyone is saying "he's young, everybody makes mistakes, thou shall not judge" BUT they're judging Rihanna and don't forgive her for...they don't even know why they don't forgive her, they just don't.

I felt like crying. As a black woman I see her as my sister, I wish someone COULD find the words to convince her not to come back to her abuser, anybody, Mary J, anyone. Most women come back cause they end up believing the DESERVED to be treated that way, physical abuse starts with mental abuse and Rihanna has been mentally WEAKENED. People don't understand that. There was a case of physical abuse in my family, and all I can say is ladies, if Rihanna comes back, seeing how violent he is at this age and over a text message, he will KILL HER.

If those women had been white, both Snoop and Dre would be in jail right now, and in the bread lines upon their release.

And I bet AL & JESSE would be screaming "racism". I told someone one day, the only way RKelly can be sent to jail is if one of his victims is white. Black people don't care for little black girls, they always find a way to intimidate the victims and their families. Now let a white girl sue this guy and it's over.

Gloria said...

Rhianna probably isn't getting the kind of support that she needs from home. I heard on the radio that her cousins were blowing everything out of proportion (and are blaming the media on trying to destroy Chris' career) I also read that her father said that he would support her no matter what she chose to do.

Somehow I believe that she's probably facing the same kind of backlash from her family-maybe not as severe but just the same.

This situation reminds me of the same responses that Sparkle received when she went after R. Kelly during the sex abuse allegations. The young girl in the video is her niece and Sparkle's whole family turned against her when she begged the girl to come forward...

Gloria said...

I meant to say that Rhiann's cousins are accusing the media of blowing everything out of proportion...

Gloria said...

I agree Phoenix Sun,

Its sad because this yo-yo behavior is a part of the illness/cycle of domestic abuse. Furthermore we have yet to hear what went on in her home while she was growing up.

Her close circle probably believe they are helping but they aren't.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe her father said that he's behind her. if anything he should went into raging mad man and protect his daughter from chris. he should have a man-to-man talk with chris if that's how it's going to be. her father is of no help and neither are the people supporting this relationship.

ugh im soo disappointed in her. i can't be a fan of someone who allows her life to be trotted on by some insure guy named chris brown. i hope the state still presses charges on him. they can still do it with out rihanna's say.

Taylor-Sara said...

Exactly Sky, It's shcoking that he would not have gotten more involved. This is his daughter!
But I am much more shocked that she would even consider taking him back! He bit and choked her! You have to be completely out of control to bite someone and choke them until they are unconcious!!!

Halima said...

Lola

... people were saying that Rihanna deserved it "because she looks like someone who has an attitude", wtf does that mean? I don't understand how you "look" like you have an attitude, and do they know her personally?

Then I read that they needed to know what happened before forming an opinion. WHO NEEDS TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED? I do NOT need to know because there is NO REASON AT ALL that could justify a man hitting a woman.


people are saying all this because THEY HAVE TO SUPPORT/DEFEND BM. This is simply working back from that one standard objective.

When such incidents happen, people simply impose 'We have to support bm' on the situation, regardless of what happened and then immediately start working backwards from that point, building a story and a case to meet the starting requirement.

This is essentially how it works. When we realise this we wont be shocked and stupified at the latest antic folk put out in service of this central agenda. Just know they are working backwards from that central premise.

At this point I think we can well place 'black male protectionism' as a central concept of black thought and belief system.

And about youtube etc, Sara, this just undescores for me, what is becoming more concrete to me daily, that a significant portion of black folk are degenerate (have achieved degenrate state and are indeed active in degeneracy). Many of us havent realised it yet, and continue to try to work with everybody. This is the key reason why we are going down at the moment, because you cannot do anything with degeneracy.

the appropraite response should be to make a strong demarcation/distinction from them and everybody else, until it is implanted in societies general understanding that there is a degenrate faction of the BC.

indeed, if those who want to salvage the BC knew what was good for them, this would be their key strategy.

Any model i repeat, any model that suggests that we should all work together as black people and doesnt recognise and take into account the fact that there is a 'degenerate' faction within the black group, is doomed to fail.

Supposing I wanted to Date a White Guy...?

Anonymous said...

@ Clarice..."I am appalled that no one BM in a position of power with media access, Samuel Jackson, Quincy Jones, Bill Cosby - John Legend, Denzel Washington all well raised supposed men of quality have remained silent and not refuted or loudly and publicly taken a stand on this."

Why should Bill Cosby be the poster child for everythhing that is wrong in the AA community? Also, I am under the impression that there are those who are tuning Bill out and will not listen to what he has to say.

Most men know that Rhianna has to first step up and say she will not accept this type of behavior.

Some people will not put themselves out on a limb if the victim is not willing go out on that limb with them. You may end up looking foolish. I am a bw and I have been there trying to help and end up with people looking at me as if to say, "What are you talking about?"

AL and Jesse will not speak up because they do not want to anger their fellow bm. Think about it their main adgenda are bm. Though, I am sure it is mostly bw who are their primary supporters.

Between people pressuring Rhianna not to press charges and Chris sending her prresents and saying please forgive me, Rhianna probably feels she does not have a choice...still do not go back to him.

simply me

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

Today I decided to look more into this, since I haven't followed much of it, and there are pictures showing that they're indeed back together, enjoying themselves at one of Sean Combs' (I refuse to refer to him by an ignorant name) homes. Due to this, I have no respect for her because she obviously has no respect for herself. I also have no respect for Chris, for not only did he physically (and probably verbally and mentally) abuse this girl, but he is actaully enjoying himself as if nothing happened...as if what he did needs to be oblivious to everyone.

Behavior like this needs to be put on blast and confronted, for if it's not, it will continue to grow. I actually thought this girl was intelligent...I thought she would use this as a platform to speak out against domestic violence and be proactive about the situation. That's my fault...I didn't realize she was that mentally slow.

In the end, I try to live with a saying that my aunt always says, "You deserve whatever you deal with." I just wish that she (Rhianna) would make a better decision...then again, this is what she wants, so I no longer feel sorry for her, and I don't want her to influence my younger nieces and cousins, for we don't have weak, ignorant women in my family.

Anonymous said...

"I am appalled that no one BM in a position of power with media access, Samuel Jackson, Quincy Jones, Bill Cosby - John Legend, Denzel Washington all well raised supposed men of quality have remained silent and not refuted or loudly and publicly taken a stand on this."

Well, how would you classify Jay-Z basically threatening to harm Brown.

Anonymous said...

The only reason to mentioned the high profile persons is because despite what they may or may not have done in the past (B Cosby) they have the access to the media. Moreover they have at least B Cosby has in the past attempted to call people to stand up to what is wrong - so all that is being said is walk the talk. This is yet another example of all talk no action. Yet another reason BW must separate from any dysfunctional, damaged, depraved ppl and create fullfulling enriched lives. No one in the collective community is going to further anyone's agenda but their own.

Halima said..."make a strong demarcation/distinction"

Here here, separate yourself mind, body and spirit.

Evia often says "Always present yourself well. It's vitally important to do this. No one but you has to know EVERYTHING you're thinking. Keep your mouth closed, sometimes. Only say out loud those things that will advance your interests or at least won't hurt you and those in your GROUP--whichever group you're in. THINK before you speak OR act."

Always act in your own best interest no matter who complains.

V/r

Clarice

Anonymous said...

I agree with all the comments.

Domestic abuse is a cycle that all involve participate in. Until the victim and the abuser come to terms with their stake in the cycle, no amount of pointing out the obvious or counselling will make them change. Rhianna and Chris need to cogntively realize that this behaviour is unacceptable period.

As for the Al Sharpton types of American BM, I have yet to see them truly defend BW in the media. They are only focused on their own needs as BM.

I am sorry to say but... based on the American media, BM seem to lack the conviction, backbone, class, intelligence, and integrity to point out when their behaviour is plain WRONG and sometimes criminal.

Anonymous said...

@ Clarice..."Evia often says "Always present yourself well. It's vitally important to do this. No one but you has to know EVERYTHING you're thinking. Keep your mouth closed, sometimes. Only say out loud those things that will advance your interests or at least won't hurt you and those in your GROUP--whichever group you're in. THINK before you speak OR act."

I agree with that. Sometimes are people who is just waiting for you say anything just so they can make a big deal out of it.

simply me

Anonymous said...

Correction...Sometimes people will wait for you to say anything that could be misconstrued and use it against you.

simply me

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, I used to wonder why some bw or bp seem to only want to be in the company of wp. To a certain degree I understand.

s m

Eubie Drew said...

Typing from a cell phone.

If you all chose to separate from the damaged faction of the bc, along w/ others who felt as you do, what size portion of Bppl would you all comprise?

Not that you should let that affect your decision, but I am trying see what such a new world would look like.

I hope this Q is not out of place.

MrsRony said...

Ok I haven't heard anyone blaming Rih for this. None of the conversations in the barber shop or grocery stores or anywhere else Ive heard the topic discussed has taken this stance. Im surprised you are taking comments on You Tube as a real slice of the black community. I mean really...most of the comments on any you tube video are from stupid kids being mean, petty and vulgar. Very few responsible adults.

I too wondered why no celebrities were coming out but the way alll of Browns deal got immediately cut off sent the message he is toxic.

Since this pitiful girl has chosen to go back to him I have no more pity or outrage. I don't care what happened or who did what. She deserves whatever she gets in my opinion. Suffer the consequences of your actions babygirl. God speed.

Gloria said...

LOL @ Anon 8:55 PM.

Although I don't have high comments or expectations of Sean Combs, I'm quite shocked and disgusted that he would go so far as to lend out his home to the two of them. Why didn't he just stay out of it?

Rhianna has surrounded herself with a bunch of enablers. I sure hope she's not handling her finances the same way she's handing her personal life *SMH*

Anonymous said...

IMO, Sean Combs aka Puff of Smoke is a wuzzy. Plain and Simple.

Yes, he could have easily stayed out of that mess. Why try to pull two people together after that type of fight? Men and Women argue and fight; but, that was a FIGHT to the end.

Again, "Puffy cake" is either protecting some investment he has going on or he is protecting his "boy".

simply me

Welcome said...

Her father should step up and demand that she does not have anything to do with Chris.

Actually from an article I read he did. But the problem is the black girls/women in Hollywood/Music ala
Whitney, Hallie staying with these men because of the black community.

Taylor-Sara said...

That's what I was wondering cool splash, if the bc had anything to do with it. BW who leave so called, good bm are horribly ostracised in the bc even when he busts your head open. Remember Mrs Bryant? The so called man who beat her in the parking lot and tried to kill her, (her husband )was given a standing ovation in church, and bailed out by the church while she was forced into hiding because of death threats!!! lord have mercy! Remember how bp dumped whitney the minute she dumped bobby? It didn't matter that he was cheating, lying drinking, drugging, and was constantly violent, they still expected her to put her own needs (and health) aside and stay with him... Remember halle, now she not only did everything she could to make it work with bm, but she stuck by her husband's (bonet) side as he slept with HUNDREDS of women claiming he had a sexual addiction. Then the bastard goes to court and has the prenupt voided (he had a really good attorney) and sues her for lifetime alimony! He won by the way, and she had to give him a 4 million dollar house plus 25.000 per month for life!!! After he cheated on her, he gets paid for it!! Nevertheless bp were STILL livid when she fell in love with that beautiful wm-they still think she should have given another sorry ass brotha a chance to use and abuse her rather than be happy with a wm....

Anonymous said...

excellent point sara. and that's why bw are seriously going to have to cut themselves from the bc. i for one never felt part of bc, cuz of so many screwed up things and mentality they have. i have my family and that's all that matters. if anything were to happen to me, they wouldnt' march of me, they would just shrug their shoulders or place the blame on me.

bw will have to find security and backup from each other, stay neutral, or just stick to family. cuz the bc does not have the bw in mind at all. not even her daughters.

Halima said...

Aabaakawad said...
Typing from a cell phone.

If you all chose to separate from the damaged faction of the bc, along w/ others who felt as you do, what size portion of Bppl would you all comprise?

Not that you should let that affect your decision, but I am trying see what such a new world would look like.

I hope this Q is not out of place.


Aabaakawad i dont known if this is in refernce to my post but i'll bite. Let me say that I think there are 3 main factions with regards to this situation. The right acting and thinking black folk and the degenrates are two, but i believe the bulk of blacks fall in the middle group, ready to be influenced and recruited to either side. Essentially most of humanity are middle ground folks on autopilot in most things.

the degenrates are winning at this point because they dominate the ideas and values about blackness and what blackness should be about, and this is as a result of peverse values and distructive meme's operating. therefore we have a situation at present where degenrates are multiplying unncessarily because the winning team always recruits more fans and admirers.

I believe one of the most distructive memes operating in the black community is the notion and sentiment that black people are all good and wholesome apart from the actions of whites. In other words our problems come from and are located external (white people). The whole value system built around this belief has essentially laid black people low.

i am sure there are one or two more but the created belief system has prevented black people from making adequate provisions for dealing with internal evil and wicked elements, which every functioning system must have. indeed look at the human body, it has a complex excretory system without which the body would become poisoned internally.

defeating and checking this 'degenerate creating dynamic', can be achieved by making evil 'evil' and good 'good'. These must be clearly differentiated with resulting reward and punishment systems in place to secure the system.

Supposing I wanted to Date a White Guy...?

Anonymous said...

All the bw I know are happy that Halle is in a sound relationship.

How in the world did a healthy man get the judge to hand him $25,000. per month in alimony?

Halle should have taken Wesley (jail bait) Snipes' to court when he punctured her one of her ear drums. Imgine how hard he had to hit her in order to damage her hearing.

Halle pressed on and SURVIVED and now she is really living well.

a.f.

Gloria said...

That's what I was wondering cool splash, if the bc had anything to do with it. BW who leave so called, good bm are horribly ostracised in the bc even when he busts your head open.

ITA Sara,

Let's not forget what happened to Robin Givens when she "told on" Mike. Robin never did get back into the good graces of black folk...

Gloria said...

Then the bastard goes to court and has the prenupt voided (he had a really good attorney) and sues her for lifetime alimony! He won by the way, and she had to give him a 4 million dollar house plus 25.000 per month for life!!! After he cheated on her, he gets paid for it!!


What's with these trifling kneegrows asking for alimony? David Justice tried to sue her for alimony too *SMH*

Anonymous said...

LQueens is a prime example that this post from Black Snob is true. People of quality especially women need to separate themselves from the toxins - excrete them from their lives and never look back.

Clarice

http://blacksnob.com/snob_blog/2009/3/2/rants-state-of-emergency.html

Anonymous said...

@Anonymous, 4:00 p.m....Speak for yourself. Many bw were against R. Kelly. THEREFORE, YOU DROP DEAD!

Signed A.F.

Anonymous said...

I don't know how to feel about this. I know it will come to a bad end. Situations like this always do.


@ A.F.

I was against RKelly and I know many women were, but sadly and sickeningly there were many BW who came out and supported him. I can remember hearing the radio call in shows and seeing clips of street interviews in Chicago where woman were saying the most insane things - like this girl knew what she was doing and many admitted to watching the video!!


I also recall when the men were sentenced in Milwaulkee for gang raping that 12 year old and a 22 year old female was quoted in the article saying that it was a waste for those men to go to jail for that and implied that the 12 year old 6th grader knew what she was doing.


So I just want to say BW need to be aware of other BW and vet them as hard as they vet men.

Anonymous said...

Just when I thought that the hypocrisy and indifference towards Rihanna's situation couldn't get worse, I'm reading that her FATHER, COUSINS AND FRIENDS approve of this reconciliation.

That's right people. So sorry Ima write in caps.

Everybody sees a girl coming back to her abuser, everybody's judging her for doing it, but what the world doesn't seem to see is A 21 YEAR OLD GIRL WHO WAS SENT TO HOSPITAL OVER A TEXT MESSAGE AND WHOSE ENTOURAGE IS CELEBRATING A RECONCILIATION BETWEEN HER AND HER ABUSER. THIS GIRL IS ALL ALONE, HER ENVIRONMENT DOESNT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT HER, THEY ARE A BUNCH OF LOSERS. NOBODY TRIES TO DISCOURAGE HER FROM RUNNING BACK TO CHRIS KNOWING THAT ABUSED WOMEN END UP BEING EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE AND NEED PROTECTION AND HELP. IF ANYTHING, PEOPLE TOLD HER SHE NEEDED TO PROTECT "HER MAN" FROM "THE SYSTEM". DO PEOPLE EVEN REALIZE THE PRESSURE SHE HAS TO FACE AT SUCH A YOUNG AGE? FOLKS ARE TRYING TO SAVE HIS CAREER AND MAKE SURE THAT DA PO BM DOESNT GO TO JAIL, AND THERE IS NO DOUBT THAT HER EMOTIONAL, PHYSICAL, MENTAL HEALTH and CAREER TOO WILL BE DAMAGED AFTER THIS... BUT WHO REALLY GIVES A DAMN ABOUT A BW'S INTERESTS IN THE BC? All of them were celebrating this crap in Miami, at Diddy's house. That's SO DISTURBING! What kind of father is cool with this? What kind of relatives approve of this? What kind of "friends" encourage an abused woman to "work things out" with her abuser? And did yall know Will "Mr Perfect Man" Smith is also for them "working it out" and supports Chris? Speaks volumes about his character, now I fear for Jada and what they teach their children. Chris didn't look like he was affected by the situation. Let's be real here, he never was. In his public statement he was only sorry that things "transpired", not that he actually hit her!

The general public cares about Chris' past, oh poor kid made a mistake because he grew up in an unhealthy home (an explanation YES but an excuse? NO. if my parents were thieves, would that "excuse" me robbing people? that could probably explain, but not excuse). But what about Rihanna, do people try to understand HER life, HER past, HER feelings? Rihanna's father and relatives supporting this LETS ME FURTHER KNOW that her mother is probably an abused woman, whether verbally, physically, or both and this young girl is probably used to this "norm" in her family.

People may "lose respect" for her and call her weak, but these situations are very confusing especially if the guy didn't show his true colors from the get go, and if the woman was never raised to value herself. Most battered women often times go back to their abuser because they either think it won't happen again (after an emotional apology followed by gifts and a promise that he would never hit her again) or that they deserve it. Doesn't mean they "deserve what they get", Tina didn't, Whitney didn't, Rihanna definitely doesn't.

Anonymous said...

I haven't heard anyone blaming Rih for this.

I HAVE!!!!! I have and it's beyond ridiculous. Grown folks saying that she must love it if she comes back, not knowing a damn thing about the psychology of a battered woman. WTF ever! The BC is TYPICALLY blaming the woman. Why do you think they still call Tina a sellout and still label Halle Berry CRAZY and swear that's the reason no "good bm want her"? And on youtube, it's not just comments on from kids, it GROWN FOLKS past 30 years old making videos about their THEORIES and making fun of Rihanna.

@ Aphrodite, I agree with you 100%. Most of the people I've heard defend R.Kelly were black women anyway. Sad but true, many black women are enablers and PART OF THE PROBLEM!

Anonymous said...

Sara, I just wanted to let you know about the haters out there. CI and Siddity have been making nasty remarks about you, HP, and Halima
Here is a recent quote from Siditty's blog

Classic One: Hp's blog is one very sad and very cruel blog. People like HP, Sara, Halima etc. do allot to hurt their own cause.Who would want to date interracially after reading that crap?

Eubie Drew said...

@Halima

Thank you for a thoughtful response. I guess what I was trying to find out is whether there would be some sort clear demarcation separating off a healthy faction, and what that would look like. But I can see the vast middle you speak of would continue to have ties, so the demarcation would not occur, or be permeable. Frankly I find this reassuring.

Looking forward to more about Sarah Davies on your blog.

Wishing you progress.

Taylor-Sara said...

Thanks for the head's up Anon, but that's nothing new. I think he's jealous of HP. HP's blog has grown at an incredible rate, and alot of ppl want to hear what he has to say (incl. me). His incredible popularity has undoubtedly earned him some vicious and jealous enemies...

Unfortunately the only way some ppl can build up their work is by tearing down someone elses. That's just life.
but it's funny he should use that word to describe our blogs. That's the exact word I would have used to describe his blog, but I had to much class to broadcast it....
Thanks for the info, but it's not important, lets get back back to the topic at hand......

Anonymous said...

I don't agree with Sara on everything but I do agree that so called Black organizations are nothing more than Black Male supremacist groups and they need to be called out as such!

I find Chris Brown's actions to be unforgivable and I question Rihanna's sanity if she did in fact get back with that damaged beyond repair brute!

I'm sorry but until black men defend black women I don't wanna hear that tall tale about black love! I still prefer asian and white men. Nothing sexier than a White or Asian Adonis.

Felicity said...

This whole story is just so sad and it breaks my heart, Rihanna is six months older than my daughter and she needs Divine Intervention right now, because she does not seem to be supported and she needs support. There is no protection for the black woman.

Anonymous said...

I agree 100% with Lavette and Sara!

Anonymous said...

"They are back together. Get off their back some women deserve a smack." Mr Laurelton Queens

Maybe your Dad should have slapped the taste out of your Mother?

@ Sara...you have to be invited to C1's blog. I would be weary of anonymous posters trying to stir up mess.
When I was reading C1's blog I do not remember him using the word crap ever.
He has an extensive vocabulary.

a.f.

Anonymous said...

@ a.f.,

The comments were made at Siddity's blog over 2 weeks ago on her chatbox.

A few of her own readers were asking both Siddity and C1 to tone down the hate.

I know because I asked them to stop.

Black Onyx

Anonymous said...

Today, Steve Harvey spoked out against Chris Brown's behavior toward Rhianna. And, there was another deejay speaking against the violence.
A little late I think.
Also, I think they the disc jockeys are speaking out because of the uproar on the internet. Even a deejay on a very conservative radio station spoke out against Chris Brown and Rhianna should not have reconciled with him.

lyn

Gloria said...

I only posted this mess for the bw that still have that I am a "ride or die" chick for my bm/bc. I think this fool is a clown but still there are some who think otherwise:

http://www.tmz.com/2009/03/03/suge-knight-chris-brown/

ETA he also beats his women. My how crud sticks together.

Gloria said...

@ Lyn,

In defene of Steve Harvey (which doesn't happen very often) he spoke out against this foolishness when it first happened. As a matter of fact he speaks out against domestic abuse quite often (as well as pushing women to vet men). That's probably why so many bw listen to his program.

Anonymous said...

Just piped in to make a comment about Halle Berry's divorce from Eric Benet. Eric Benet tried to get his original pre-nup agreement with Halle overturned. The judge in their divorce case ruled that he had to live by their original agreement. He got money but he didn't get any additional money which is why he wanted the pre-nup overturned in the first place. Eric got a house (as part of the community property he and Halle acquired while married) as well as alimony but he only got what he agreed to when he signed the original pre-nup...nothing more...nothing less. His lawyers tried to get the pre-nup overturned but they were not sucessful.

As far as Rhianna and Chris Brown are concerned. Knowing the pathology of my people (i.e. black people) Chris Brown will get an image award from the NAACP next year and Essence will put him and Rhianna on the cover as an example of black love. (smdh). You know damn good and well its going to happen.

Anonymous said...

im glad to hear steve harvey speaking out against this. every time i hear someone say "leave them alone", "it's her fault" etc etc, my stomach churns and i wonder if anyone, ANYONE cares about black women! a few guys on YT spoke out against CB and Rih-Rih going back to him here's one...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShWkL2wEd2U&feature=subscription


please God let Rihanna make her own decision and leave. if the bc doesn't want to support her she sure as hell has the wc to support her, hello her Covergirl deal is on the line! no wait..her LIFE IS ON THE LINE!!

Gloria said...

ITA Anon 12:29. YT bloggers everywhere are saying that they don't want their daughters looking up to Rhianna as a role model and that they are truly disappointed in her decision to stay.

*sounds of money flushing down the toliet*
___________________________________

...Chris Brown will get an image award from the NAACP next year and Essence will put him and Rhianna on the cover as an example of black love. (smdh). You know damn good and well its going to happen.

*Shakes head in agreement*

Gloria said...

I'm sry I meant to say Sky :0

Anonymous said...

looks like Usher has stepped up and said somethings too...

http://www.vh1.com/news/articles/1606180/20090303/usher.jhtml

Anonymous said...

selena said..."...Chris Brown will get an image award from the NAACP next year and Essence will put him and Rhianna on the cover as an example of black love. (smdh). You know damn good and well its going to happen."

and i'll be one of the first to cuss out essence magazine. especially after that trifling mess they did w/ p.diddy and kim, what was that!

Anonymous said...

There's only one person who can save Rihanna now, and that's Judge Judy

Halima said...

Aabaakawad said...

@Halima

Thank you for a thoughtful response. I guess what I was trying to find out is whether there would be some sort clear demarcation separating off a healthy faction, and what that would look like. But I can see the vast middle you speak of would continue to have ties, so the demarcation would not occur, or be permeable. Frankly I find this reassuring.

Looking forward to more about Sarah Davies on your blog.

Wishing you progress.


Hi there and thanks Aabaakawad for the kind thoughts yes i must get round to writing about sara davies (hint hint).

To add to my comments, I think one key thing i need to reinforce about those in the middle is that they can be 'swayed' either way, it is not a well developed understanding and 'principle' thing with them, it is about what is popular, what is the general way/the order of the day, which very much depends on who has a 'hold' over general values and norms or what holds popular imagination. its like 'monkey see monkey do' dynamic. thus it is necessary to make the 'seen' something positive and progressive so that 'do' is the positive and progressive as well.

'back to front' culture has been allowed to flourish within the BC largely because we are holding the negative elements up rather than ridiculing it and laughing it into a corner. And we are here at this point because when these evil trends were emerging we stayed our hands from doing what ought to have been done, because we were decieved by the assumption that we were protecting something uniquely black!

sorry sara for preaching (lol)

Supposing I wanted to Date a White Guy...?

Gloria said...

So now these two are married???

*Shakes fist in the air*

Damn, Damn, DAMN!!

Anonymous said...

The affadavit from Smoking Gun. Page 5 is a doozy!

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0305093brown4.html

Anonymous said...

Well, at least the police and the DA's office haven't backed away from prosecuting just because of celebrity or because Rhianna may or may not cooperate with the prosecution. It is truly mindboggling that she seems to have gone back to this guy. According to her statements to police, Chris Brown has been beating her over the course of their relationship with escalating violence. Why on earth is she still with this guy? I'm sure she's under some outside pressures to try to keep Chris Brown out of jail and help him redeem his image, but I hope someone who is in her circle will pull her aside and help her to see/think clearly, and save her own physical health and her own career. Already I'm reading on the internet where people who were initially on her side are calling her stupid and dumb for going back to him and swearing off her and her music because of the bad example she's setting for women (especially young girls) by going back to him. The black music industry seems ready to save Chris Brown on the back of Rhianna's career - they don't really care what happens to her - anything to save a brother. As much as she's the victim, if she's not careful she may find herself back in Barbados with a dead career and wondering what happened.

Anonymous said...

why are you all promoting wm like they're the greatest thing since sliced bread? You know black men are the best. Deep down inside, I know you want a black man. You cannot tell me that if you found a black man who took care of you and provided/protected you, you wouldn't want him. Black men are by far the sexiest, strongest and sweetest when they want to be and you know it...

Anonymous said...

i would like to add that although i love bm, i in no way support what chris brown did, but he was just one bm, i don't believe that's a reflection on all bm or even most bm.

Eubie Drew said...

Re: the affadavit:

Oh. My. God!

WTF!

She's going back to that??? Her friends and family want her to go back to that???

I had thought this was probably a flash of anger. Still a reason to never go back. But this was a sustained attack. He could easily have maimed or killed her. I think he probably would have, had he been with her in a place where he had more control. She may only be alive because it happened in a vehicle!

This has to be pursued by the law regardless of her level of cooperation.

{Running to the bathroom to vomit.}

Gotta go.

Taylor-Sara said...

get real,
you better get real! why are you trying to promote black men on an interracial blog??? Go to a BM site, and cheer for BM!!! -duh!

Anonymous said...

CNN has the story of what happened in the car. They use the name Robyn F. as Rihanna (why i don't know). After reading that, i just don't understand why she would want to go back. I hope the state puts his behind in jail.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/03/05/chris.brown.charged/index.html

Anonymous said...

Yep, it’s pretty disgusting, and even with ALL of that, people are still talking about chris brown being innocent, that he came from an abusive home……….i don’t give an beep beep where he came from, no one has the right to harm another person, period!!!! And talk about useless, rihanna’s father is very useless, I have not seen such an example of extreme uselessness in a long time, but rihanna’s father sure does fit the bill. may him and chris get lost in the ocean. What kind of man lets it be known (so publically too) that he’s okay with his daughter going back to her abuser?? What kind of man??? And poor rihanna, with so many people whispering nonsense in her ear, I’m sure she’s so confused. May God bless her, may God make her strong, make God let her see the light. And to bw out there ready to throw acid on rihanna, this issue is so much bigger than a ‘self-respect’ issue. It is. Self respect has nothing to do with it, women the world over are abused every second, I repeat, this is not a self respect issue.


I wish bw would make a greater effort of detach themselves from bm, I really wish they would. Us as a group would live so much better lives, it’s not even funny. But constantly, all I hear is, ‘well, my father is a good bm’, or ‘my brother is a good bm’. I’m sure chris brown felt sorry for his mom for being abused but did he TREAT rihanna with that same pity and concern, nope!!! Just because a bm relative is good to you, doesn’t mean they’re good to other bw. So why do so many bw base their loyalties to bm solely on their positive relationships with their bm relatives. I would say most bm don’t have much loyalty to bw no matter how good the relationship with their female relatives are, so my fellow bw what gives?

Anonymous said...

omg, i just read the smoking gun as well. chris brown is an ANIMAL, he is a monster. all i can think of was how terrified she must have been. how painful those punches and hits were. i'm sure the thought that he might kill her ran across her mind (and that is cruelty in itself).

it is amazing how looks can decieve, on the outside, he looks so normal. but the level of violence he displayed with rihanna (may God bless her) shows that he is a very sick, angry individual. nothing in this world can warrant that kind of abuse, let alone your current girlfriend seeing a random text from one of your sex buddies. may rihanna have the strength and courage to detach herself from the madness of people encouraging her to stay with this pycho. only she knows what she went through that night. may God look after her and show her the light. Chris brown is not worth her life, neither is her foolish father, her 'friends' or the bc

Anonymous said...

this was a sustained attack. He could easily have maimed or killed her. I think he probably would have, had he been with her in a place where he had more control. She may only be alive because it happened in a vehicle!


Not to highjack the topic, but can you imagine what would have happened if Chris had read texts from HER phone. This animal probably would have killed her!!

Anonymous said...

To get real.
What the hell makes you think EVERYBODY wants a bm just because you OBVIOUSLY do??? That's ridiculous! That's just like ww who think only wm who cannot get a ww go to WOC! Pure ego, no logic. I for one have NEVER found bm attractive (mostly because of inner qualities, -or lack thereof) I am happily married to a tall handsome wm, and would not take 100 so called brothers for him! You can continue to lie to yourself all you want, but what kind of self-respecting woman/women would continue to run after men who abandon their children, cannot stay out of jail, won't work, treat women like garbage, and hate their own black skin so much they maim, harm, and kill others who look like them on a regular basis? It's long past time for bw to ABANDON bm the way they've done us!!!

Taylor-Sara said...

I just can't beleive she has gone back!! I heard on the radio. how he kept beating her, and beating her. And that he bit her ear, and told her he was going to kill her, and I'm just in shock that she would go back to that. She's a beautiful girl, she's talented and famous etc. What could she be thinking? And I don't think she's considered the ramifications to her own career! I think it will be extremely damaging to her let this man stay in her life, and not just physically. I think it'll be career-suicide! I pray she wakes up, she may not survive the next attack!

Anonymous said...

@ Sky

Her legal name is Robyn Rihanna Fenty

Anonymous said...

Mary said: And talk about useless, rihanna’s father is very useless, I have not seen such an example of extreme uselessness in a long time, but rihanna’s father sure does fit the bill.

----------------------------------

THANK YOU...THANK YOU...THANK YOU...for saying this. My mouth dropped to the floor when Rhianna's father made the statement that he would support his daughter no matter what and no matter what her decision. EXCUSE ME???!! You mean to tell me as a father you support your daughter staying with a man who beat her ass. As a father you support your daughter staying with a man who we now know (since the police report has been released) has been beating her all along...REALLY??!! What kind of father is he. What kind of man is he. No father who had any kind of integrity would say something so stupid and if he had any integrity at all he would take Chris Brown behind the woodshed and beat his ass just like he beat his daughter's ass. Me thinks Rhianna's father is more frightened of loosing the family meal ticket than he is about protecting her.

The whole situation is ridiculous and unfortunately what it all boils down to is money and protecting Chris Brown's career at the expense of Rhianna. Cause don't you know, he is a good black man and he needs to be saved (sarcasm mode turned on).

As soon as I heard Chris Brown was holed up at Puff Daddy's house in Miami I almost vomitted. Main reason being is that PD is using the CB/Rhianna situation to further his own ambitions. He gives Chris a place to stay, convinces him that he can get his career back on track, rehabilitate his image (along with Rhianna's), lock him up in a long term contract and reunites him and Rhianna in the process. He makes himself look like the conquering hero and makes both Chris and Rhianna eternally grateful to him. And the kicker???...He gives a big fuck you to Jay Z in the process since Jay Z had the "audactiy" to usurp him in the mind of the public as the King of hip hop.

Anonymous said...

Just a question...What if Rhi Rhi was a darker tone woman would so many people be so outrage?

lyn

Taylor-Sara said...

What the hell are you talking about lyn? Why would her color be a factor? Do you think dark women are LESS valuable and precious than lighter ones? Are you on something? This has NOTHING to do with skin shade! Of course I would be as outraged if she was dark! It would not make ANY difference. I'm trying to figure out your motives for asking such a question, and what it bodes for your mindset....

Anonymous said...

Just a question...What if Rhi Rhi was a darker tone woman would so many people be so outrage?

lyn

----------------------------------

In a word...NO...because if Rhianna was dark skinned she would get no sympathy at all and even better if Chris Brown were a white man, everybody would be shouting from the rooftops how awful he was. Al Sharpton and his ilk would be having daily press conferences and no black celebrity would be giving him the benefit of the doubt or better yet praying for him.

Anonymous said...

"In a word...NO...because if Rhianna was dark skinned she would get no sympathy at all"

Please explain to me what kind of SYMPATHY is Rihanna is getting, cause so far I must have missed it. All I hear and read is that Chris Brown is innocent or just "made a mistake", and we gotta "let a brother breathe". Please SHOW ME EXACTLY HOW HER LIGHT SKIN HELPED because even her father and relatives are cowards and won't try to save her, but instead allow Chris to get away with this bull. That's the WORST situation she could be in. She didn't get ANY sympathy from most people or help from her entourage. Yall need to stop insulting people's intelligence.

"LYN" is just another troll trying to start some sh*t so we stop focusing on the real problem : a black woman being thrown under the bus, because her abuser happens to be black and the CCBC only cares about saving HIM. DISGUSTING!

Rihanna is emotionally, psychologically and physically damaged. She came back because that's the result of confusion. She has to face pressure from black folk in the industry plus the fact that she must feel guilty (although she's not). The battered woman's psychology is quite disturbing but real, they need help and love, and people who blame them are treating them like the men who beat them do. I want Chris to go to jail, not only because justice needs to be served, but also because that's the only way she'll be protected from him and find the help she needs to emotionally dettach herself from him.

Anonymous said...

Please explain to me what kind of SYMPATHY is Rihanna is getting, cause so far I must have missed it. All I hear and read is that Chris Brown is innocent or just "made a mistake", and we gotta "let a brother breathe". Please SHOW ME EXACTLY HOW HER LIGHT SKIN HELPED

----------------------------------

Lola...I am the anonymous who made the post about if Rhianna were dark skinned. If you want to know how her light skin has helped her...just look at how this case is being covered in the mainstream(i.e. white) media. They have been totally sympathetic towards her. That same sympathy is going to change in a heartbeat now that it has been discovered she and Chris Brown are getting back together but for right now the sympathy is there. And the sympathy for the most part will still be there even if they are back together because they will give Rhianna the benefit of the doubt. I'll give you an example. Do you remember when Robin Givens was married to Mike Tyson?? I do. Do you remember when she and Mike gave a sit-down interview to Barbara Walters on "20/20" and Robin announced that she was an battered/abused wife? I do. I also remember all of the fallout after the interview aired. I remember how Robin was NOT seen in a sympathetic light at all by both the black and white media. Do I think her skin color had something to do with the treatment she received after she made the revelation...yes. It always does. If Robin Givens were white or a light skinned black woman I can guarantee you she would have been given the benefit of the doubt about the abuse in her marriage, but because she is dark and had a reputation of being a bitch...it was much easier for the press to malign her. Rhianna isn't white but she's fair, she's beautiful and better yet she's from the islands so in the media's eyes she isn't the "typical" black woman and therefore the sympathy factor is there.

Rhianna was on the cover of People, Us, In-Touch, OK and all of the tabloids (National Enquirer, Star, etc.) after the news about her and Chris Brown broke in the media. Do I believe this would have been the case if say (hypothetically) it was Lil Kim or any other famous (with their level of fame on the same scale as Rhiann's) dark skinned model/actress/singer who was Chris' girlfriend...IMO, I highly doubt it.

Anonymous said...

actually i think lyn is somewhat correct: the white media wouldn't give a crap about her if she were dark-skinned and "homegrown." but it also helps that she's a crossover artist--many whites enjoy her music, so they've sorta "taken" her in.

Delishmish said...

I'm baaaaaack...lol..Just kidding. I'm not really back per se. I have just been busy LIVING.

Now to the matter at hand, and the side issue...it shall be brief.

Why do we continue to separate ourselves into tones and shades. I am not guilty of this personally. It is not important to me. Whoever brought this up has an issue as it were..and I feel sad for you. That is not an attempt to demean you in anyway. I just want us to STOP describing people by their skin color. Riri is our little sister...and she is in trouble!!!! We forget how young she is, to be thrust in the spotlight. We also must be mindful that she has many around her trying to shape and craft some image that is probably not even her. She is reminded on a daily basis WHO the source of her good fortune is...ie black people for the most part I imagine (I am not one of them. I don't care about her singing per se, but I do like her style, as it were.)

I bet she is being told that her career will be over if she does not support her attacker, and forgive him (or does she want to be responsible for sending another BM to prison)....and then there is the not so small matter of the abuse. I bet it is not the first time. Sometimes when you are that young, you think this behaviour is actually passion...you have fights and then you make up. Maybe she thinks it means he really loves her....I don't know her, so this is all speculation.

All I know for sure is that WE as BW (and we come in all types, but what bonds us is our shared uniqueness) should be rallied around her, NOT HIM.

Chris Brown (once again, he is not the sort whose music I care about) is basically a little punk. He clearly has no respect for women, and that is sad indeed. He is so young. I hope he can rehabiltate himself, and learn C O N T R O L. That is what separates a man from a boy...so clearly he is not yet a man. He is not my focus. I care about the well being of US...the Black woman...and I hope she gets some proper advice form someone who loves her (and not her pocketbook)

She needs to step away from this guy forever. This first kind of love tends to be very strong and heart wrenching,....but I am pretty sure that Romeo was NOT "busting" Juliet in the face, biting, strangling her and threatening her.

Disagreements are going to happen in a relationship. The MANNER in which you resolve them tell you a lot about yourself and the person you are with. If a man actually places his hands upon your person in anger...you must get out of this relationship at once..no second chance. That is why I believe that women must also be independent. You must have someting for you....

As for whomever mentioned Robin G..I was ALWAYS on her side. I think she was more the victim of bad PR more than anything. People did not like that she "seemed so haughty." She also was very young..and with a NOT wonderful person (IMO) I don't think it had to do with skin color...at that time we were still in an era where people were uncomfortable with seeing a young powerful ambitious (and sexually attractive) BW ..to me that is the real reason she was castigated....she was too beautiful and entirely too ambitious for some..a bit of the crabs in the barrel syndrome.

Anyway..clearly I was telling an untruth when I said I would be brief. I have more to say..but quite frankly..I can't be bothered...but Ri...if you( or anyone like Ri..age unimportant reads this) know that I am sending you
L O V E and support. This is just a stone in the road. There is another true love for you..and his name IS NOT Chris Brown.

Anonymous said...

I hope all those people who are going on about "Chris just made a mistake" read the affidavit about how he beat her in that car and that she also said he'd beat her times before. I'd like to hear them keep calling all of that violence by a grown man against a woman a "mistake". And the few black celebs who came out against Brown and for Rhianna are all back-pedalling now because the 2 of them are trying to reconcile. Ridiculous - this is the time when those celebs should be privately and/or publicly telling Rhianna save her life, mental health and career, and get away from this man forever! Unbelievable that Rhianna and her lawyer actually asked the judge in the case not to prevent Chris Brown from being able to come near her - so that they can continue their reconciliation, I presume! They are working overtime to save Chris Brown from the consequences of his own actions. I am fed up with the so-called "black community".

Anonymous said...

Wait, wait.

Are you talking about the MEDIA making a distinction?? or WHITE PEOPLE?? Or BLACK PEOPLE?

The media is "sympathetic" (if you call reporting facts or spreading rumors, aka the media's job, "sympathy") because she's FAMOUS and because there's a PICTURE OF HER THAT LEAKED. The fact that she's on every cover doesn't prove that the media is siding her. If they did, they would have been cruel to with Chris Brown and I have yet to read that Chris is "EVIL" in one of those magazines, but if I missed it I stand corrected.

I don't know if white people (the public) support her, but if they do they support a POPULAR BLACK GIRL. Lauryn Hill had the same amount of popularity, had she been a victim of domestic abuse when she was in her prime, I do believe the media would have covered it and white folks would have supported her.

Now the BC. The only ones making a real difference between light and dark in general are black people, but when it comes to blaming black women (which is what we're talking about), black people DO NOT DISCRIMINATE. BLACK PEOPLE RIGHT NOW DONT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT RIHANNA, hence Al Sharpton not showing up, and her being called stupid on every black site.



I'll give you an example. Do you remember when Robin Givens was married to Mike Tyson?? I do.

I think Rihanna's main "advantage" (for lack of better word) is that there's a picture to "prove" she was abused. People were already saying that she was lying or that it was probably no big deal before the pic surfaced. Was it because of her race that Robyn wasn't believed? Yes, partly. Another reason could be machism, another reason could be Mike being more popular at the time. But I don't think Robyn being lighter would have made a difference for white media, they see BLACK PEOPLE AS "BLACK" for any scandale. Sanaa Lathan or Vanessa Williams would have been treated the SAME. White people and white media dropped BOTH Mike and Robyn in the end. The BC protected Mike and treated Robyn like sh*t, like they're doing Rihanna. Different shade, same treatment.

Now if you tell me white women are more protected than black women (of all skin shades) in america, I co-sign. But that's a different subject.

Anonymous said...

Please tell me a beautiful, talented, famous bw like Rhianna is not falling for the old "nothing but a black man" foolishness. How is she going back to him???? It's really tragic. I just don't know what this says to other young black girls. There have to be other men out there that she can spend time with... smh.

Anonymous said...

@ Anonymous, 3:25 p.m...that is exactly what I meant.

lyn

Anonymous said...

lola said...

"In a word...NO...because if Rhianna was dark skinned she would get no sympathy at all"

Please explain to me what kind of SYMPATHY is Rihanna is getting, cause so far I must have missed it."

A number of radio personalities at the local level, nationwide and several news commentators have spoken out against Chris Brown - not surprisingly none of these men are BM. No BM and no WW (HP would not be surprised) have come out in support of her or to condemn his behavior.

Sane, rational people are outraged at the brutality - regardless as to her color! Healthy members of society and real men are outraged at the brutality and savagery of the attack. That is NOT normal acceptable behavior and MUST NOT be tolerated or condoned. To take no action and to not speak out is to encourage and accept this. I have contacted the companies that have cancelled or pulled his endorsements and commended them for taking a stand and encouraging them to continue to maintain that stand, despite the decision Rhianna has made. I've never been a fan of his music - so no money lost there but I am encouraging radio stations that have stopped playing it to continue with that stand.

I do not condone her decision - it is clear she is not acting in her own best interest. All we can do is pray for her safety and protection and demand that the courts pursue this case to the fullest extent of the law and vendors do not condone his action by letting him represent their products.

Chris Brown is a danger to himself and society. He has anger and rage issues and clearly lacks self control.

Calling the man an ANIMAL is an insult to animals. Animals, except for rabid ones, only inflict the level of harm in this assault if attacked or cornered and if the victim does not resist they stop - rather than indulge in a prolonged - sustained attack such as this.

V/r

Clarice

Gloria said...

Hey Delish *internet wave* :-P

AMEN to your "brief" response.

Lola,

Spot On!

Anonymous said...

yes yes yes! people in rihanna's family have some sense, since her father apparently has none.

http://omg.yahoo.com/news/rihannas-family-reacts-to-chris-brown-case/19723

Taylor-Sara said...

Hey delish, glad to have you back! Where the heck have you been?

Anonymous said...

A number of radio personalities at the local level, nationwide and several news commentators have spoken out against Chris Brown - not surprisingly none of these men are BM. No BM and no WW (HP would not be surprised) have come out in support of her or to condemn his behavior.

Clarice, thanks for the info and this really proves me that sadly, no matter what those anonymous posters are saying, she's getting all this coverage but she does not get massive support. She gets two or three non black men speaking against Brown, a few of us black women doing so too (on blogs like these so far, I guess no famous BW wants to jeopardize her career). But most BM, lots of BW enablers, most WW, don't give a damn. When you have a self-proclaimed role model like Will Smith backing up Chris Brown, knowing this man has a wife and a daughter, something is really wrong. Majority of white consumers are WW, I think it has to do with the fact that there are more white women than white men. And majority of them don't support Rihanna. You'd think the feminist movement would care, guess they have bigger fish to fry. That's so hypocritical. So again, she gets no massive support - light skin and hazel eyes didn't change the fact that she's still a BLACK WOMAN. So, I don't buy the "light skin" priviledges. That's a black mindset, and once again black people threw her under the bus before details surface and still blame her after seeing the pics and reading the details of the assault on SmokingGun. Quite frankly, although it was very predictable, it hurts me. Not because she's famous, but I'm realizing that not even FAME can save a battered black woman. We sistas need to STOP focusing on that skin tone bs and stick together! Rihanna is one of ours!

Anonymous said...

Please tell me a beautiful, talented, famous bw like Rhianna is not falling for the old "nothing but a black man" foolishness.

Anon, Rihanna stated that she loved white boys too before she fell for Chris. I don't believe she has that mindset, but I believe she's in love with him and is being pressured by her people/the industry to protect him. As a matter of fact, there's a video circulating of producer Johnta Austin making fun of the couple, immitating Chris punching Rihanna calling them the "Ike and Tina of our generation". Usher was in the video talking about why isn't Chris remorseful why is he chilling at Diddy's house like everything's cool? Later on, he apologized on behalf of himself and his friends (cause Jermaine Dupri and producer Brian Michael Cox were in the building cracking up too) for « disrespecting Chris Brown ». WTF??? Do yall see how insane this is? Even Usher felt the heat for trying to defend Rihanna and had to take back what he said. Like I said she's all alone, she's a baby in this industry among grow a** men and enablers who want her to shut up. I think they're also trying to make her pay for letting people know she wasn't exclusive to black men. She's been isolated since age 18, her family isn't around, they created her "black Madonna" image but you can tell it isn't her, Lord knows what they do to her. She's always been a puppet. You know you're alone when your own father doesn't speak against your abuser. This is ridiculous.

Anonymous said...

@ DELISHMISH,

I just read your comment and I totally agree! Sorry for posting so much, but for those who don't know, Oprah talked to Chris and Rihanna and this is what she said :

"You need somebody to tell you the truth in this moment. And the truth is guys, both Chris Brown and Rihanna, if I were your friend, I would call you up and I would say 'give it some time, get yourself some counseling, take care of yourself, heal yourself first.' And also, 'love doesn't hurt.' I've been saying this to women for years; love doesn't hurt. 'And if a man hits you once, he will hit you again. He will hit you again. I don't care what his plea is, he will hit you again.'"

http://entwire.blackvoices.com/2009/03/06/notable-quotable-oprah-winfrey-weighing-in-on-chris-brown-rihan/

Anonymous said...

Isn't this site about darker tone bw? Who supports Rhianna, the majortiy of people who read this blog.

I have nothing against Rhianna. Yes, she should get herself some sound counseling. It is about time someone was reporting from the view point of Rhianna's other close relatives and not just her father. Is her mother still us?

Ladies we can say want we want about colorism.
COLORISM is ingrained and it will take many more years before colorism among all people of color dissolves. I believe it will happen... many years from now.

Speaking of Rhianna, her commerical just came on and it is a nice one. It is good that her commerical appeal is still intact.

I have heard 2 or 3 white djs speakout against this R/C situation. After everything settles maybe she will do what Halle did and date out.

Not many cele. bw have a media outlet where they can speakout and I believe they are not pleased with what they are seeing and hearing. Also, they too have to be careful with their careers and includes Usher.

I try to respect other peoples opinons whether I agree with it or not.

Taylor-Sara said...

Anon. I don't know who is spreading that rumor, but allow me to put it to rest right now. THIS site is about BLACK WOMEN! I would NEVER be so ignorant as to catagorize ppl by skin tones. This site is about SISTAS in ALL shades! As far as Ri. goes, I dont' think a young woman's foolish mistakes should be used as justification for someone smashing her face in, do you? Yes, she should leave, but that in no way releives Chris Brown of the responsibilities of HIS actions. He needs to seek counseling, and she needs a restaining order....

Gloria said...

Look how Samuel Jackson shucks and jives (and shows his real colors) his way around the subject when asked about his stance on Chris and Rhianna?

People we MUST remember this when we give up OUR dollars!!!!!!!!!

http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=6e42f78c-7c45-4655-bb68-a8bc0eba58ed

Anonymous said...

In this day and age even kids in middle and senior high schools understand they should move away from an abuser.

Rhi Rhi is an adult and I just know she is familiar with this type of situation. She cannot be that naive.

I am not going to put any more energy into this woman or man.
She is more fortunate than so many women who have been abused.
Take your money and make it work for you. Buy yourself the best attorney, mental health professional/counselor, SECURITY PERSONNEL and get a protective order, move away from your abuser, TELL THAT ASSISTANT OF YOURS TO STOP TELLING YOU WHAT HE IS SAYING BECAUSE YOU DO NOT GIVE A DAME, Put some space between you and your father because he is weaked minded.
I am through with this subject.

Anonymous said...

Who is saying Chris Brown is not responsible and again he should go to jail. I am in NO WAY justifying anyones BAD BEHAVIOR.
Put his butt in jail and through away the key as far as I am concern.

Anonymous said...

In addition, I agreeing with those who say Rhianna should get counseling and I was not really concerned about Chris because it is obvious that he is getting need support.

Anonymous said...

@ Selena, what is the name of the actress who is with Samuel again?? I commend her for saying what she said. Seriously, she stated how she feels and a MAN like Samuel couldn't even say what hitting a woman is wrong? Wow, I lost respect. Will, Samuel, didn't know Morgan Freeman was an abusive husband, seems that more and more people are showing their true colors.

Anonymous said...

Isn't this site about darker tone bw? Who supports Rhianna, the majortiy of people who read this blog

That skin shade crap is totally IRRELEVANT. How do you know the complexion of the women here??? Where did you read that it was for dark women only? Why do you act like it's a crime to support a sister who happens to be light skinned? Aren't YOU discriminating in this case? YES SOMEHOW YOU ARE. REGARDLESS of her complexion she DESERVES MAJOR LOVE AND SUPPORT, which she doesn't get. Do you SERIOUSLY think Rihanna is getting the "white woman royal treatment" right now? You can't be serious.

You're talking about white media this or that, sisters supporting her "because she's light". Do you know who discriminates against dark skinned black women most? Most black men, yeah I said it. Why do you think that when you see a black couple the lighter one is the woman? Because most sisters have no problem dating dark skinned men, they do not discriminate like bm do. Throughout history sisters had no problem defending and protecting (the irony, a woman « protecting » a grown a** man) a dark skinned man. Black men on the other hand preferred lighter BW (PAST TENSE, they're going straight to non black these days, not that I care, I'm just trying to make a point), and wouldn't touch Alek Wek if their lives depended on it. AND THIS IS NOT OUR LIGHT SKINNED SISTERS FAULT!!!! Alek Wek is loved by a man who happens to be WHITE, black men call her FUGLY. Nowadays, the bulk of black men discriminate against BLACK WOMEN AS A WHOLE. Most of them BELIEVE that any woman who isn't black is better than ANY black woman of ANY shade. NONE of them call Kim Karshadian a « whore » for having the lifestyle she has, but they're quick to label Rihanna a stupid b**** for being battered. So NO, her being a light skinned sista doesn't give her more support! Stop criticizing white media, or black women supporting her. Black women are SUPPOSED to support her, female enablers are a problem, not sistas who support sistas. The majority of the BC doesn't support her, white media are talking about the case because she's POPULAR, I have YET to hear the feminist movement say something or non black A-LIST CELEBS stand behind her. Special "light bright" treatment my a**!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FunkyStarkitty50 said...

I think that the poor girl is sick in the head and very immature. He is too and they should not be together. I just hope that she wakes up before it's too late. He will abuse her again, this won't be the last time. She's beautiful and she's selling herself short and settling because she thinks she's in love. It's very sad indeed.

Eubie Drew said...

Watching the cable coverage on MSNBC, FOX and CNN, I saw amongst the commentators and anchors (not much info on celebs, that wasn't really covered) definite support for Rhi against CB, by bm, bw, wm and especially ww. Can't say if they were feminist ww. I don't know about radio and the less serious cable news channels, because I haven't listened/watched those venues about this issue.

Offline, I haven't heard any support for CB amongst the bm, wm, or ww I know. The wm want to hurt the guy. I haven't happened to talk to any bw about this yet, 'cept u gals.

So it seems maybe class-status, geography, divestment, and perhaps other things figure in to this besides race and gender of the person with an opinion.

Gloria said...

@ Lola,

That's Anna Horsford. She played Icecube's mother in the "Friday" movies. She also played the policewoman in the TV sitcom "The Wayans". For us old-heads she also portrayed the love-struck preacher's (Sherman Helmsley) daughter in "Amen". She's been in a lot of other stuff but that's what I remember her in.

You know his (Samuel Jackson) response speaks volumes. Either he's scared to respond because of his own career (in which he should've said nothing) or he himself has kicked around a woman or two in his life. Either way he still represents the "good blik men" (yes I said blik) that are also the silent ones which are more damaging to bw and children. I really don't think these black celebrities realize (nor care) how many children actually listen/watch what they say and do *SMH*.

If you're living in a glass house you can't say too much. And that's what a lot of thes men are facing. Case in point: I didn't know until this mess started that Tyrese beat his then pregnant gf. Now he has the nerve to be seen with this daughter because his ex-gf just took his azz to the "cleaners" and excused him of being a dead-beat father. I also didn't know that Terrence Howard (Hustle and flow) is also a woman beater.

http://www.the-savvy-sista.com/2009/02/smoking-gun-shines-light-on-terrence.html

If anyone knows of ANY black feminist groups please let me know.

Anonymous said...

@ Aabaakawad, frankly the only bm i've heard are from jay-z's camp : jay-z, john legend, kanye. usher took back his words so he doesn't count. will & samuel are disappointing. the black women i've heard so far oprah and Anna Horsford. wm i don't doubt it, i've heard it offline too. ww i haven't heard so far but i wanna believe a few of them said something. offline most black people i know blame her, these are educated people, some travel and speak several languages, in other words not your stereotype. also, understand that because some people dont openly "support" CB (although a few DO support him openly : http://concreteloop.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/85266921_10.jpg) doesn't mean they don't "blame" Rihanna. Some ppl still tell you "well we weren't there". There's a lot of subliminal ish going on. I guess if this post was written on this blog "why is SHE being thrown under the bus" the lack of support must be quite obvious.

@ Selena, thank you. I knew I saw her somewhere, that was on "The Wayans". Tyrese did hit his pregnant girlfriend, but I'm shocked by Morgan Freeman, I didn't know about Terrence Howard either. WTH!

Eubie Drew said...

@Selena

There is a prolific commentator named Ashe on the blog "White Women Suck!" (I hate that title.), who is a young black feminist and easy to talk to. I don't know an email or website that is hers, so you will have to catch her attention in a comment section in that blog. Try this link:

http://whitewomensuck.blogspot.com/2009/02/nothing-good-in-life-comes-easy.html?showComment=1236211500000#c7544835743854671617

Good luck!

Anonymous said...

"Tyrese beat his then pregnant gf"

"Howard then grabbed the victim's left arm and punched her twice with a closed fist in the left side of the face."
When a Whitemarsh cop responded to the scene, Howard admitted, "I broke the door down and hit my wife."



wow, i'm just shaking my head, both of them can go to hades, wow, you learn something new everyday

Eubie Drew said...

@ lola

I don't doubt it. I was just throwing in my observations. I haven't followed the celebs myself.

Anonymous said...

last night i believe(or the night before) it was Anderson Cooper who talked about the Rhianna incident, and there were people on there who said Rhianna should not go back to CB including Oprah.

Oprah is suppose to have a show on domestic violence sometime this week and surprise guess who was on there...Tyler Perry, the same guy who had Sanaa character on the family that preys slapped so hard she went across the table.

unfortunely only in the BC have i seen in movies where the audience thought it was funny that the woman gets smack/deserves the smacking.

Anonymous said...

I agree that a lot of the bm celebs don't want to speak out against Chris Brown because (1) they'd be hypocrites because they've also beat women down, (2) because bm subculture is that you don't "snitch" on another bm, especially where snitching could put him in jail, and (3) a bm who beats up a woman is often still considered in bm subculture and in the larger black culture as a "good" black man, and good black men must be protected and kept out of jail. It makes me sick to my stomach to listen to the wishy-washy words, the silence, and the blame-the-victim excuse-making of these bm and bw defending Brown.

One thing I will say for the white community is that, just like with the crime of rape, whites have for the most part moved away from the blame-the-victim mentality and are very clear that it is NOT acceptable for a man to beat a woman. Such an incredible contrast to what we're seeing with the black community (at least on a lot of black internet sites). The BC has a lot of growing up to do to confront its own mysogyny and its insistence on protecting bm at all costs (even at the expense of women and children). People need to suffer the consequences of their own actions - often this is what it takes to make them stop and get the help they need.

Anonymous said...

@lola. just to start for the record alek wek is not terribly attractive. sorry not buying it.

and thats not becuz of any bias towards dark skinned sistas. on another note, the reason brothas date non-blk women are probly not much different from the reason why white men date sistas.

its always amazing to me how much brothas are demonized for dating outside their race. but literally everyone one else regardless of gender or race are given a free pass!?!?

truth be told, the whole rihanna/c.brown saga is not too different from what happens in alot of relationships in this country regardless of race. i've always been a strong advocate of neither man nor woman, putting their hands on one another.

if true..the bruising c.brown gave rihanna its obvious he was out of control and completely lost it. i dont condone that. at the same time we have no clue on any of the circumstances that lead up to that. that doesnt excuse c.brown. but it also doesnt make him a batterer, which is a different category that i see the women on this blog all to easy to lump him into.

but then again it shouldn't be a surprise. virtually every pic loaded on this site is plastered with some sista draped over some pathetic 2520, that no F/2520 wouldnt even want.

Peace.

Ether Blade said...

I am pissed off at this and I believe that he should be made to pay for beating her. What is hollywood saying with their silence that its okay for a black woman to be beaten. No way.

Anonymous said...

@lola. just to start for the record alek wek is not terribly attractive. sorry not buying it.

Truth be told, "truthbetold", this is subjective. Truth be told, the vast majority of the people on earth aren't "terribly attractive" and if alek wek is not terribly attractive, she's not terribly ugly. Let's say she's "less than average", based on your standards. Bm DO touch less than average non bw, they STILL wouldn't touch alek. Doesn't really matter like I said, cause alek is living well, I'm just trying to make a point.

I won't waste time on the bm vs wm dating outside comparison, cause truth be told, you are just a victimologist and protectionist in denial of a truth we all know too well in the "BC".

C.Brown isn't a batterer, yeah right. Especially when reports state that this is not the first time it happened. Even if it was the first time in 2 years, isn't there always a FIRST TIME for every single batterer? So what did you "prove" with this? Nothing. Sometimes it can take over 2 years, sometimes it can be after a first child's birth. You just cannot predict when it will happen. Like women beaters are gonna let their women know that they'll beat them at the very beginning of their relationship, genius. He just "lost it", didn't he? We're making a mountain out of a molehill on this blog, geeeez! So because he doesn't hit her "on a daily/weekly basis" it's different? Truth be told, I'm not surprised at this reaction, it's so typical of victimologists/protectionists to minimize untolerable actions or behaviors when it's from a bm. He's not a batterer, he's in a "different category" based on the "first time" thing? So a first time "rapist" (for lack of better word, in fact, it's a first time, so he's not really a rapist), who just lost it being perfectly sober at that (like C.Brown) isn't really like "other" rapists? We should just give him a damn break cause that was his "first time" and he just had a bad day? Do you realize that all habitual beaters, rapists, etc....., were once first timers?

Truth be told, you should just STFU cause you're an idiot.

Anonymous said...

lola, you are obviously some deranged feminazi recruit. i find it ironic that you throw around edumucated (sic) buzzwords like victimologist/protectionist, indicating a leaning towards a liberal arts education/background. but somehow u find it unreasonable to believe that c.brown could honestly be sorry!!! and that he is incapable of receiving therapy.

oh that's right i forgot where i'm posting (IR love & spice - rofl) therapy doesnt work nor apply to animals like BM.

to defer to oprah's opinion is like deferring to a drug-addicted bum for real estate listings. she is a perpetual victim and sympathy/pain monger.

oh and for the record BM think alek wek is fugly! why ...becuz she is. lol.

Taylor-Sara said...

Truth be told, that was a lot of nonsense. You need to leave now. This is not the blog to start mess on. We are not about that silly bickering over the( po wittle black man's feelings) or any other reason. Take your indignance and find the door. You are a troll pure and simple. There is not even a good reason for you to be on a black woman's blog. There are plenty of blogs that cater to your type-(shite starters) go find one!

Anonymous said...

lola, i'll be honest alek wek is ugly as hell. i was trying to be nice.

Regardless of your standards, bottomline is, you see BM with "ugly as hell" non-bw all the time. So it's not her so called "fugliness" that bothers yall.

she's "living well" portraying a stereotypical jigaboo for a white audience.

What is so stereotypical about Alek? What makes her a "jigaboo"? Her features? Her skin? Her nappy roots? Truth be told, most BM feel ashamed of this kind of blackness being seen worldwide, they wish she would just hide somewhere. Truth be told : what really turns BM off is the darkness of her skin, not her so-called "fugliness".

oh and for the record BM think alek wek is fugly! why ...becuz she is. lol.

LOL. BM think Grace Jones is fugly too, so? And who cares what BM think? BM don't give her her million dollar deals. BM didn't make her the ICONIC MODEL she is today. BM don't give her love and treat her like a queen, another man is taking care of that. So as far as I'm concerned, what BM think of Alek is irrelevant, if you believe it matters you have serious delusions of grandeur. I was trying to make a point with Alek, not crying over BM finding her ugly. LMAO!!

somehow u find it unreasonable to believe that c.brown could honestly be sorry!!! and that he is incapable of receiving therapy.

Did I ever say he was INCAPABLE of receiving therapy? Don't put words in my mouth. I did say a batterer will hit you again. Most batterers don't do therapy. All those who don't go through therapy hit again. And many of those who went through therapy hit again. Therapists say it. I never said he was incapable, but it's hard to cure. And while he needs therapy, YEARS of it, he doesn't need ANY WOMAN BY HIS SIDE (that he could harm) while going through it. He also needs to be jailed like any criminal. We all make mistakes, many of us have been honestly sorry for doing something wrong, but for some mistakes being sorry doesn't change the damages done. Some mistakes can scar another human being for life or worse kill them. If I was honestly sorry for losing it and accidentally killing my child by beating them down for the first time, that wouldn't change what happened and I'd still have to live with the consequences of my actions (jail time).

lola, you are obviously some deranged feminazi recruit.

Truth be told, what is deranged thinking is saying that what Chris Brown did "doesn't make him a batterer". Do you even read what you write?? You throwing words like "feminazi" is just a pathetic attempt to intimidate and silence me. I'm calling a spade a spade, you ARE a victimologist and a protectionist.