This is a story- portrait of what life can easily end up being if we don't take charge, and make imperative marriage choices with great care and caution. I think we all know that marrying the wrong man is one of the fastest ways to reach hell on earth. But what about the havoc created for your children. What about the long term consequences, and the irreparable damage done to one's self esteem and psyche. This story attempts to illustrate a glimpse into the life of one woman who's one bad decision almost cost her everything.....
Sylvia turned the key and entered the dark rickety apartment. Her small 7 year old, Tia, was right behind her. She was struggling under the load of potatoes from the local food kitchen. Sylvia's heart lurched. She hated her baby having to carry charity potatoes and walk up 4 flights of stairs to their apartment at 451 Donnely Place. Unfortunately, she couldn't carry them because she had to hold onto her new baby, Abagail. She sighed as she switched on the overhead light and laid abbey in a blanket covered drawer that served as her bed. She thought about putting it on the table to keep the roaches off the baby, but the danger of Tyshon storming through and knocking it off, stopped her. Work all day, and then pick up the kids to put them to bed in a house so old and rotted it made her sick to look at it. She wondered how it had come to this. When she was young she had so many dreams. None of them resembled this nightmare. She silently watched Tia head for the fridge hoping against hope there would somehow be food. She watched her face fall as it always did when she found next to nothing inside. "S'okay baby " She murmured. "I'ma squeeze some money from m' chec this week an we'gon get some food ok?" Tia nodded. Her sweet little brown face looking downcast and unsure. Suddenly she brightened. "Momma, kin we have some tatas and eggs?" Sylvia jumped up. "Oh! I forgot about the eggs " She cried happily. She ran to the baby's old stroller that had been pulled from the trash and found the eggs in the bottom basket, perfectly intact. She sighed in relief as she made eggs and potatoes for Tia and herself. Tia smiled gratefully as the plate was set before her. She's so precious. Sylvia thought to herself. She was always so happy with so little, but Sylvia was sagging with regret.
Why God why, didn't I listen to ol Ms Brown back in the day? She wondered to herself. She told me to look for two very important things. A good college and a good man. She warned me not to get pregnant by a sorry man or me and my kids would suffer that mistake for years! At the time Sylvia had not paid any mind. Ms Brown was an old woman with old ways and old values. What did she know? But now in the light of day 17 years later. Sylvia could see how horribly right Ms Brown had been. She had met her man Tyshon and been swept off her feet. His words had been so sweet back then. Before she knew what hit her, he had managed to sweet talk her out of her inhibitions and and her panties, and she had gotten pregnant with David. Along the way she had managed to get a ring from him in exchange for her giving up college and agreeing to go to work full time. That had turned out to be a horrible decision. Tyson had no more interest in being a husband and father than he did in being faithful. He ran the streets all day, had a violent temper and spent them into the poor house. Sylvia had barely managed to save their apartment twice after he'd found the rent money and used it on cheap wine and cheaper women. He'd been such a horrible father, that Sylvia was almost grateful that David had gone to live with her father vowing to never return. She had prayed and prayed that he would change, but the only result had been more children and more worries. She was only 35 years old. Yet she looked old before her time and more like her sad and dejected mother every day. Her once vibrant brown caramel colored skin was now tired and leathery looking. Her lovely slanted dark and mysterious eyes that once seemed to have a hidden secret, now looked like desecrated graves. She worked 50 hours a week and barely saw her two remaining children. Her husband spent money faster than she could bring it in and there was no one to talk to. In her community you didn't complain about your man. Too many women simply saw this as betrayal or bragging, since so many women were manless, and angry. I'd almost be better off manless! Sylvia thought to herself as she watched Tia scarf down her food. The tic of the clock almost caused Tia to jump out of the chair in fright. "honey, it's ok. " She told her. "It's jus the clock, it ain't daddy" Tia's tiny body relaxed ever so slightly and she finished off the plate. She knew better than to ask for more. They had to make food last in the Williams household. She put her dishes in the cracked sink and hugged her momma.
Sylvia held her tightly wishing to God she could turn the clock back, and searching her mind for a way to get her remaining babies out of this hell. She couldn't afford to move as she barely made enough to pay the bills now. She didn't have the first, and last month rent plus security deposit and moving expenses, it would cost to run. All this went through her head as she gave Tia a brave smile. "Go to bed and say your prayers ok?- Momma loves you baby" Tia smiled up at her. " I love you too Momma, " She answered solemnly. But her little face looked frightened and confused. Sylvia watched her wrap her coat tighter around her thin shoulders as she headed toward the small, cold back room....The only thing colder than the ugly, delapidated apartment, was her hope of escape.....
The next day at Ocean Side Medical Clinic, Sylvia patiently explained to a new patient, that her insurance had not sent the referral. Dr. Lucas would not see her without it. Sylvia explained that she could pay for the 900.00 treatment now, and seek a reimbursement but that Ocean Side could not guarantee that she would receive it. The girl waved the problem away, and opened her purse. Sylvia watched in amazed envy as she counted out nine 100 dollar bills, and handed them to her. The girl was young, pretty and white. She's probably never known a hard day in her life! Sylvia thought angrily. She handed the money to the cashier, then grabbing the chart, led the girl to a back office. The building was newly renovated with all the latest amenities, central air and brand new carpeting. A far cry from my building Sylvia thought ruefully as she took the girl's
temperature and vital signs. "Do you know anyone who's looking for part time, night time work?" The girl asked suddenly. Even her voice was light and carefree. Sylvia glanced at her chart and saw that her name was Lena. "What kind of work? She asked sullenly, certain that she would not qualify. "Well, it's really easy, see it's my sister in law she's just had a baby and her regular house keeper is in Mexico visiting her sick mother. She won't be back for at least 3 months. In the meantime they need someone reliable to come and clean the house and fix a meal while she recuperates from her C-section, which will take about 6-8 weeks. They have a morning girl but she can only stay for breakfast. They need someone at night. It pays 200.00 per week for just a few hours per day. do you know anyone who might be interested?" Sylvia could hardly contain her excitement. Did she! Oh God, she needed that job! "Uh, well...."What are the hours -and where is it located?" She began to fire questions at Lena like an interogation unit. When Lena gave her the information, she breathed excitedly. " I could do it until her girl gets back. " She stammered quickly, trying not to appear too anxious. "Well bring your references tomorrow night Lena told her. She wrote the address on a sheet of loose leaf and gave Sylvia more details along with directions to the house. Sylvia was so excited she barely felt the remaining work hours. Oh, God I hope someone doesn't get my job! She worried. She desperately needed that money. Tia's shoes were so small her toes were coming through, and the baby was not tolerating her milk and the Doctor had told her, she would have to switch her to a very expensive special brand. that 2oo.00 per week would be a lifesaver! Not to mention, she could finally save something to move with. She swallowed her excitement, and forced herself to keep working....
She told Tyshon about it that night, asking him if he would watch the kids while she took the second job. She knew if he refused she would have to pay Ms Moppet to do it, and she wanted to save that money. She didn't tell him the most important reason for needing the job was 'get away money' She had decided no matter what, she had to take her kids and run. She finally faced the fact that life was never going to get any better with him. She hated to leave them with him even a couple of hours, but she was desperate. Her happy thoughts of escape were interrupted by Tyshon slamming down his beer. "Oh so you wanna go to the big house and clean fo tha white foks huh" Well, I ain't watchin nobody! These yo kids -I got better thangs t'do than watch these damn kids and you ain't takin no job no way. I needs you here to fix my plate." Sylvia stared at him. His skin was pockmarked and gray from just not giving a damn. His teeth were so bucked, they resembled a can opener, and his clothes were dirty and strewn with some disgusting substance she did not dare identify. But the worst was his breath, which reminded her of old collard greens. She turned away, her stomach feeling queasy. What the hell had she ever seen in this greasy gremlin! Somebody should have knocked the sh*t outta me! She thought wryly. I was obviously too young and stupid to make a sound decision or I would'nt of brought home this ..... pork belly! She pondered for a long minute on how to get him to agree to let her agree to take the job. "Honey" She purred, swallowing her revulsion, and rubbing his big disgusting budda stomache. "If I don't take it-I can't buy you more beer and that expensive chicken you like because they've cut my hours at work. " She watched his face as she told this lie, holding her breath. He seemed to think it over, knowing he would do what was best for him. Finally he smiled with his teeth of many colors, and squinted at her. " I wants you in da moment you gets off dammit! -Don't be givin da white folks no extra time neitha!" And don't forget to bring me beer on the way back-and hell nah, I ain't watchin these damn kids. Leave em wit Ms Muppet!" "Uh.. that's Ms Moppet, Tyshon. " "Whatever" he growled. He had already turned away and was eating his sandines like they were going to get up and run away, Oblivious to what his family would have for dinner......
When Sylvia finally found the house on the beautiful subdivision she felt like she'd stepped into the twilight zone. The houses were large and beautiful, the lawns expansive, green and manicured, and the streets were wide and clean. So clean it almost looked fake. She rang the bell at 215 Cachet hill and tried to quell her thudding heart. The door was expensive of heavy oak and ornately carved. Probably cost more than a month of rent, she noted. She had paid Ms Moppet to watch the girls with money she direly needed to get to work on. If this job did not pan out, she was in trouble. I hope these white people are nice, she thought hopefully. She had tried to fix herself up and look presentable, but years of neglect could not be corrected with a few curls and some expired night cream. She was wiping her sweating palms on her hand made skirt for the third time when the heavy oak door swung open. A large 6 ft plus white man stood staring down at her. He kinda looked like an executive with the expensive glasses and dark suit-minus the jacket. He had dark blond hair and teeth so white, he could do a commercial. Sylvia gulped. She felt so hand me down in her handmade skirt and 8 year old blouse. The man gave her a reassuring half-smile. "Please tell me you're the lady from the clinic who's going to help my wife until Sarita comes back!" His voice sounded desperate and tired. Sylvia felt renewed hope. "Yes, yes I am " she responded quickly. "Thank God! " He grabbed Sylvia's hand like she was going to run away. "Come in, please come in." While Sylvia took in a hallway larger than most of her apartment, he began to fill her in. " She 's recuperating." He told Sylvia as he rushed around. "She's in the sunroom getting some air now. We've got two kids and there's no way she can take care of them at this point. Don't bother with the resume I've already had you checked out." He was talking faster now. I need you to fix meals for her and the kids, and clean up a little. Nothing heavy, we have a morning person, but just a bit. And put the kids to bed - can you handle that?" Before Sylvia could speak he was talking again, telling her about his business and some kind of merger. He said he had to fly out and that the company car would be picking him up. He asked Sylvia if she could drive, and then showed her a 3 car garage with 3 brand new vehicles in it. He told her to use the station wagon for errands and to make sure she used the car seat for the baby. Sylvia barely had time to answer his questions as he was obviously in a rush to go somewhere. Finally he told her he would introduce her to his wife. They passed a large kitchen and darkened den with a fireplace, and entered a room to the right that was outdoors yet inside. The room was done in living room style with a couch and love seat and even carpet and cozily nestled around a large screen TV. "Honey. " The man said softly. "She's here."
Sylvia blinked and almost fell over in shock! A lovely black woman in her late twenties, with big brown eyes, and an angelic face was looking back at her! End of Part 1
See if Sylvia can turn her life around, and make it out of the hood in part 2. Thank y'all for tuning in ......
1 comment:
Great Story I also love reading your blog.
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