The kind of man you get will be a direct reflection of the kind of standards you hold....
I can tell you in one simple word. *Standards* It's because they have the highest STANDARDS of any cheerleaders in the world. Standards are the parameters of behavior in our lives. They determine what is acceptable to us, and what is not. I remember watching an episode of the DCC on tv, and being awed by how perfect the routine was. As I watched the girls trying to make the team, it was quite evident just how extremely high the criteria was. The women had to be very attractive, very thin, very athletic, toned, physically strong, good dancers along with grace, stage presence, and gymnastic abilities. The standards were so high in fact, that many girls began to cry upon finding out what was expected of them. They 'knew' they did not have what it took to reach them. The two women who head the team told one girl that her face did not look young and fresh. (yes, she was young) but they said it was completely obvious to them, that she had engaged in many anti-social behaviors that were now showing on her face, and that she was not a candidate for training school, and that she would never be. Another girl was dismissed because she had naked pictures on the Internet, and they told her that this was conduct unbecoming a DCC candidate, and that she was dismissed as well. I watched them send girls home for weight, body shape, lack of charm, lack of dance skills, lack of etiquette etc. Time and again, I noticed that as hard as they were on the white girls, they were harder still on the black girls. One wg was warned 3 times about her weight before she was dismissed. Yet I watched as one bg was dismissed with her very first bad performance. She cried, and begged to have one more chance, but they refused. This was a recurring theme, the bgs were given one shot deals again and again. Now this is not fair, but it IS life. The truth is the high standards for others, will always be higher still for us. No bg/bw can afford to delude herself about this. We must always be on our A-game. The most interesting part though is that of the bgs left, they were the best of the best. One was considered the best dancer on the team. One won for most athletic when she beat everyone in the competition, and one was considered as having the most stage presence etc.... The point is the bgs knew they had to be the best of the best in order to make the team -and they were.....
But lets apply this to another area for a moment.
I have a male cousin who is a typical damaged bm in a blk enclave. He's in the hospital right now due to the fact that one of the females he cheated on (There are 6 that we know of!) stabbed him when she found out that he had 3 other girls pregnant, while living with her. In fact, at a recent family reunion, one of 'his women' came with one of the babies, and he had to ask her his son's name!!! The reason many bm act this way is because the standards for a good bm have become so lackadaisical as to be almost non existent. Once upon a time the standards for being a man were much higher in the bc, and this is why we had men like my grandfather who, although he was Native American, married my grandmother, and worked to give her the best life he possibly could. He knew her family would not tolerate her marrying a bum. This is the reason that all their children were born IN wedlock, and me and all of my sisters and brothers were born in wedlock. It's also the reason that so many blk children today are NOT born in wedlock. Back in time the standards were so much higher across the board. The truth is if bm collectively and consciously decided to raise their standards of just fatherhood, the bc would be a far different place than it is today.
It makes me think of the bm of old, like for instance, I remember reading about Benjamin Banneker. This man was a mathematician, Astronomer, Inventor, and Surveyor! This man was so accomplished and so intelligent, that he correctly predicted a solar eclipse on the exact day it happened, using a complex mathematical equation. In 1792 he published an almanac that was so definitive, accurate and abstruse, that it caused Thomas Jefferson to reverse his contention that blacks were internally, and intellectually inferior to whites. Basically this man was a genius. Why? because he had the standards of a genius! (BTW-scientists have proven that geniuses are created far more often then they are born)
I also remember reading about Frederick Douglas, and the context in which he addressed the Dred Scott Decision. Dred Scott was a slave who sued his owner's wife, Ms Emerson, for his freedom (after the death of Dr Emerson) He felt he was entitled to live free because he had lived several years in free territories. He initially won, his battle (1850) but the decision was overturned by the Missouri Supreme Court in 1852. He appealed to the US Supreme court with the help of abolitionist friends and supporters. But in 1857, the US Supreme Court handed down it's decision:
***As a black man, Dred Scott was NOT a citizen of the United States and had no right to sue anybody. Furthermore, the court ruled, that congress could not prevent slave owners form taking their property (slaves) anywhere in the country.
This decision dealt a serious blow to the anti-slavery movement, because it then retroactively made prior anti-slavery laws, unconstitutional.
Chief Justice Taney declared:
"Blacks are an inferior class of beings who have no rights to which the white man is bound to respect."
Many blacks were ready to give up at that point, but Frederick Douglas roused them to fight on, with words to the effect: " The Supreme Court is not the only power in this world, and Judge Taney cannot bail out the ocean or pluck a silvery star of liberty from our Northern sky...." (In other words Taney was not God!) There was more, but I don't remember it verbatim. What I do remember is being deeply inspired by his fortitude, and strength. I remember asking my mother how ppl living in such oppressed conditions found the strength to keep going, to fight on, and march on in the face of such bigotry and hatred. She told me that they had very high standards for their lives that they were willing to die for. She said they knew they would probably perish before those dreams were realized. But they knew that if they fought hard enough, and long enough, and never gave up, that some day their children might come into the world, and have a better life....
Anyway, this is not a history lesson, but I will never forget those words. I think about these things all the time, and I wonder how our ancestors must think to themselves: I went through SOOOOOO much so that they might have better lives, and the right to live free and look how they have exploited and denigrated those gifts....and it makes me so sad.
The truth is, today, many ppl have no standards for their lives. Too many bw have high standards for their own lives (Education, career) but low standards for the men in their lives (any man will do, type mentality) Ladies, the truth is, anything you don't have standards for will fail in your life! You must have standards for everything you expect to be productive, and constructive in your life. This includes, but is not limited to: your children, your fiances, your career, education, and your HUSBAND. I'm a firm believer in using obstacles to your benefit. This is how many of our ancestors were able to keep pushing, instead of laying down to die. They saw that whites would not let them into their community, so they formed their own. They supported blk businesses, and helped each other all they could. The church is an old time relic from this nostalgic period of affinity, and brotherhood in the BC. But things are drastically different today. Today, bw must adapt to those changes, as well as others in this life. If the bc is no longer the bastion of love, protection and support, that it once was, (and it's def. not! -now it's a hovel of hell) then we need to move on. If a school you have your child in, is substandard, then remove your children and find a better school. If there is something you want desperately to do in this life, yet you lack the resources, -then find a way to get the resources to do it anyway. Life is fleeting, and short! Never keep putting off the things that you want. Never lower the standards you have for your life. And of course if bm cannot measure up to par, (don't meet your standards) then for heaven's sake-leave them where they lay, and move on!
The biggest problem in the bc today, is that we have lessened the standards so much. Our musical standards have lessened, and now we have trash 'simulating' music. Our standards of the youth have lessened, and now we have young children with no respect for their elders, or themselves. Cursing out women in the streets and walking around with their pants hanging around their knees etc. Our standards of etiquette have been lowered, and now ppl get on television and air all their dirty laundry. And our standards for bm have gotten so low, many bm will cop an attitude for being EXPECTED to take care of their own children!! We have got to life our standards back up, and stop accepting trash! Take a tip from our ancestors, don't lower the standards, find other ways to meet them.
The reason America is the best country in the world today is because our STANDARDS are the highest! When countries loosen the standards for their citizens (Iraq, Iran, China) come to mind, you can literally watch the lives of the citizens unravel, and deteriorate. (famine, wide spread abuse, internal wars, and high degrees of misogyny) to name a few....If you want to have a great life, and a great man, or even just a great career, then you must keep your standards up, and adjust your life to get what you want. You can have almost anything you want, but only if you are willing to put in the work, have high standards, and refuse to accept less.........
Read Karma story: -on white chocolate preferred....
