The deadly lies thrown at BW, and the danger of believing them....

The middle pic is fine with most bm, but the other two couples will often incur fury....

"Don't you feel guilty F&*@ing a wm after they raped bw for thousands of years?" That's what a bm had the nerve to ask me the other day (upon seeing me and my family in front of a restaurant) And let it be noted he waited until I went to the bathroom alone, to approach me. "How can you F*%! his momma, his sisters, and his daughters? " I asked evenly, without waiting for a response. He just stood there stupidly,with his arm AROUND A WW and and stared after me. I knew exactly why he had not answered. He didn't have a sensible answer! There is no sensible answer! People who live in glass houses, have no business throwing stones, it's really as simple as that. I'm so damn tired of people trying to make bw feel guilty for dating/mating/marrying out We have as much right to be happy as any other woman. I feel like we have more right because who has suffered as much as we have? Who else has had to deal with constant frustrations of being called angry, masculine, unattractive, ball busting, baby mamma etc. The list goes on and on. All races of women have had all the problems that bw have had, but we are the only ones who become named after our problems ie, angry black women, welfare queens, unmarried baby mamas etc. And the saddest part to me is; If we fight back, we're angry, if we don't, it must be true. If we protest bm chasing non-bw like they are going out of style, we're jealous. But if we don't give a damn, and go out and get a non-bm- we're letting the race down, and practicing tyranny. Ladies please listen and learn. YOU CANNOT WIN-NO MATTER WHAT -SO DO YOU!!! I see so many bw are still afraid of what the bc will say if they roll up with a wm. I say damn that! The bc does not give a damn about you anyway. So DO YOU!! Like Evia always says: There MUST be reciprocity!! I don't mind bm with ww at all. I simply want the same thing for bw. Don't we deserve to come home to a loving husband who can wrap his big warm arms around us and ask us how our day was? Don't we deserve to have someone to hold, kiss, make love to like every other woman? Don't we deserve to have FATHERS for our babies who will love, protect, and cherish them? It' s ludicrous how many bw are so afraid of what other bp will say that they virtually spend their whole lives waiting on that black prince charming to come steal them away. It's not going to happen! There can only be one end for bw who continue to wait for the black prince, and that's a lonely, desperate, one way ticket to the GRAVE!!! BM are NOT coming for you! In the years to come the only bw who will survive will be those who have the sense to wake up from the twilight zone. ALL the others will die off of depression, loneliness, disease (born of pain and anger) and they will perish quietly with ppl shaking their heads murmuring how foolish these women were to wait their lives away! Ladies no matter what lies they tell you, don't wait! No matter what the church says; Don't wait! No matter what bm tell you (ESP. them. ) Don't wait! You're life is too precious to give someone that type of control over it.

Even the church is involved in these lies! I was in church the other day ( we are looking for a new church) and the pastor was telling the women "Wait on God to send you a husband! -he'll come if you just wait!" He raised his voice and growled these words and as I looked around, I could see the women nodding and murmuring. I shook my head in despair Pastor knows good and well the chances of these women meeting Mr right in a church that is predominantly 80% female is too unlikely for words! On top of that about half the men left (all black) half of them are with non-black women! About 1/4 are using bw for sex, goodies, money, etc, and the remaining fourth are already married to various women. This is what I mean about fishing in a polluted pond. This is no place to find a husband. The church knows this but I notice they seem to demand these women come to church sometimes 7 days a week! They've got a missionary day, Men's day, bible study, bible class, choir study-and rehearsal, usher day, pastor's day.... etc It goes on and on. Some ppl are at that church 7 days per week and every time they go, there is an offering or two plus they will ask the women to donate this or that, and work on this or that. See this is nothing but the church making sure these women have NO TIME to meet a good man because he will undoubtedly take her away from the church along with all the money and free labor she is donating. Now tell me how going to church almost every day, when would the average sister find time to find a husband? The answer is; She wouldn't .

Ladies you must realize something. Never expect someone to lead you from a ditch if they benefit from you staying in it! Always question people's motives.The church benefits from black women being lonely, vulnerable, spiritually void and desperately searching for solace. The reason bm don't want bw to escape has nothing to do with actually caring about bw. They know good and well how sad and miserable many sistas are because they do not have a man. But they benefit from these sistas in numerous ways. This is why this is no deterrent for their behavior, because a bw's happiness is not the target goal. The target goal is 1. To have someone waiting in the wings in case he should fall into trouble and need her, and 2. to have someone to use for free sex, money, help connections etc on a daily basis. Many of them don't even try to hide their antipathy for bw anymore, they simply figure bw are so desperate and stupid that they can come clean and still keep their harem intact. The other day I was watching Judge Mathis. There was a bm/bw on the show suing each other. The woman was suing because she and the man had gotten into an argument and he proceeded to pound her face into his car door. She was seeking her medical bills and cried though out her testimony. The man admitted to hitting her, but claimed it was only a few times, and that he had only done it because 'she would not shut up' He went on to tell the court that she was a 'crack head' and that she really did not matter! He further stated that he only kept the association with her alive because she was 'easy sex' and all he had to do was call. The woman seemed shocked to hear him talk about her this way. She was obliviously under the impression that they were together, and that this man cared about her. She broke down and cried, looking shell shocked and pitiful. She got her judgement but she seemed like a broken shell as she stood there shaking. The man turned and laughed in her face, he knew all along he had been using her, but she, in her eternal faith had not known, and now he had told the whole world she was just a side hoe. Ladies, your very lives are at stake, don't believe the lies....... These are the main ones to be on the lookout for:

1. Black women need to just hang in there, black men WILL come home one day

2. Black women are to blame for bm leaving in the first place-now be a good mammy and wait for them to come home.

3. Black women are too loud-that's why bm left.

4. A true sista NEVER Dates/Mates/or Marries white-she holds strong regardless of her pain, distress, and loneliness

5. Black women are too un-lady-like, fat, ugly, masculine (fill in the blank) that's why they left.

6. BM are kept down by WM, that's why they are so stressed-they need sistas to stay by their side and wait...

7.IF BW didn't have so much drama, babies out of wedlock, issues, they would not be alone-then the 70% stat is usually cited

There are other lies, but I think you get the picture, you must refuse to keep believing this nonsense and actively find your own Mr right (regardless of color ) and MOVE ON....

# 1 Reason to date out, mate out, and GET OUT of the BC!!!

More and more bw are running away from the bc, and finding love and happiness in the arms of 'other men'

I left my family the other day and told them I was going to see one of my sisters. She lives in a predominantly black area of the city, and was scheduled to undergo light surgery for a common female problem. As I left the hospital and made my way to Walmart to pick up a few things for her, I encountered a group of young bm. There were about 4-5 of them. I averted my eyes so as not to attract their attention, but it didn't work. The apparent leader of them flashed me a wicked smile and said: "You is one fione b*tch! Then he turned to the others and said "Thems the kinda B*tches I likes to F***! He then went on to spew the most despicable stream of profanity, and sexual descriptions you've ever heard. I shot him a 'You are truly disgusting look, and practically ran away from them, while he and his friends fell over themselves laughing.

"She thinks she's too good for you!" one of his crew told him, laughing through a haze of cigarette smoke. "Ah she's just another b*tch!" He shot back. "None of them mean a damn thing!" I thought about that as I walked away. BW DON'T SEEM TO MEAN ANYTHING TO BM!!! It's like they see us, but we're not worthy of being thought of as humans, only as sexual toilets!!! A young girl who was standing near the bank had overheard everything. She smiled sadly at me, looking as if she wanted to cry. " I thought they only did that to teenagers like me" she said softly. "I had no idea they disrespected grown women too!"

She looked so sad I wanted to put my arms around her and comfort her. I could almost feel her pain. She probably went through this mess everyday because she lived here.

I thought about how grateful I was that I didn't live near these animals but it saddens me to no end that so many bw do. I don't understand why they don't leave! The young girl has no choice her family probably decided to live here, but what about all the women who stay voluntarily? I can't understand why they stay! Do you think it's a good idea to bring your child up around these subhumans? This particular sister, I don't visit often because I cannot stand being anywhere near these misogynistic city-dwelling terrorists. The lives of bw are hell in these places and everyone knows it! Now I am NOT suggesting that wm cannot be misogynistic, because they certainly can! But nowhere is this behavior more prevalent, more accepted, more encouraged and enforced than the black community! It almost seems to become a right of passage into manhood in some areas! These broken down, nothing- going-for- themselves, pieces of filth are allowed to prey on women and children with complete impunity in the BC! And the level of open hostility, venom and outright hatred directed toward anything female, often cannot be described, it has to be experienced to be believed. But that brings me back to my original question: Why do bw stay? Anyone with eyes can see these places are breeding grounds for misogynistic predators, yet so many bw seem to think they are going to save the race, and make bm change. Ladies, let me give you the sad facts. You cannot make a man change, and two, black men DO NOT WANT to change! They are so addicted to having ppl make excuses for their shortcomings and failures, that they've grown weaker and weaker as men. Filled with self contempt, and loathing. They attempt to push bw in the mud and step on them, so they will considered higher. What you are seeing from these men is self hatred being directed out toward the women who remind them of themselves! You cannot change these men so please don't endanger yourselves trying. Get the hell away as fast as you can, and never let these predators anywhere near your children!

I remember a few years ago, my cousin (we'll call her Lena), and her best friend (we'll call her Stef) had gone into a chicken place in the wee hours of the morning (they had been out clubbing) Both my cousin Lena, and her friend Stef were young beautiful light skinned girls. As they entered the establishment, they attracted the attention of many bm standing in line. One particular sleazeball slimed his way over to my cousin and her friend and said: " I loves myself som light skinneded womem!"

My cousin knew better than to say anything, but her friend was from a different place, and unfamiliar with the dark, twisted minds of these men. So Stef turned to the man, and before my cousin could stop her, said, "So what!- who cares what you like!" The man immediately turned into the animal he was, and began to call them b*tches and h*es. He was screaming at the top of his lungs that these b*tches had, had the nerve to insult him. My cousin tried to pull her friend away, but Stef was so shocked by this behavior that she turned to the man behind the counter, and asked him to call the police. The man just looked back at her blankly and went on serving food while this fool screamed obscenities at them. At this point my cousin was begging Stef to leave. She knew exactly how dangerous it is for bw in the hood. Stef turned to the man's friends and said. "Why is he doing this to us? -please tell him to leave us alone!" His friends looked at her like she was a cockroach, and one snarled. "Shut the f*ck up b*tch before we cut yo stupid azz!" With that my cousin was thrown away from Stef, and Stef was punched by the man and one of his friends! People were yelling, and my cousin saw Stef screaming, and holding her face. Blood was streaming between her fingers! That was when she discovered the men had, had razor blades between their fingers when they punched her! The men ran outside like the cowards they were and took off in a car driven by a female (who later claimed she did not know them, but had given them a ride at 3:00 in the morning because they asked her to!!!) Now of course she KNEW them, no female in her right mind would give a ride to strangers at 3 in the morning! The chances of being raped are too high! Neverless, they were never found, and Stef's formerly beautiful face, now bears long ugly scars that will never go away! She is just a shell of her former self. She seems broken, and her vitality and zest for life both seem long gone. Ladies, I am begging you. These places are no place for women with any hope of love and happiness to EVER be. Get out of the hood with it's misogynistic, hate filled, criminally inclined predators! Run as far away as you can, and encourage other bw to do the same! This can become a matter of life or death for you and your children. These places have become cauldrons of pain, despair and hopelessness. Your children will learn what they live! Think about that for a moment, is this the life you want for them-or for yourself?

Why we MUST focus on our own agenda....

This is going to be a bit controversial (but when am I not- huh?)

For those of you who do not know, I have a very handsome half- Spanish brother named Pedro, whom I love dearly. He is the child of my mom's second marriage. Pedro has Spanish features, long braided hair (halfway down his back). He's very fair complected, Latino looking, and fluent in his native language. In fact, people always think he's lying when he's says he's half black.
Anyway, something happened to my brother a few months ago that made me think. In early January, he had a job interview that his best friend Tito got for him. Everyone knows the economy is horrible and everyone is losing jobs, houses etc. Well out of the blue my brother decides he's needs a better job, as he wants to marry his girl friend. (He's way too young, but that's another story) Anyway, everyone in the family was telling him to go apply later on when the economy picks up, and that he won't have a chance right now. He didn't listen-he never does. He's always been the type of person who does exactly what he wants. Anyway, he went for an interview for a very high position within a local corporation. ( A position which would normally be considered out of the question for someone so young and inexperienced. -Keep in mind my brother is not old enough to legally buy a drink! Anyway, a few hours later he drops by our house and swoops me up happily! He told me that when he went to interview, he was originally scheduled to meet with a older bw, named Ms Williams. But as he was asking the receptionist directions to the lady's office, two very friendly Hispanic women began to converse with him in Spanish. They asked him if he was there for an interview, when he answered yes, they not only escorted him to the appropriate office, but gave him inside tips about the job. Then they told him to stay there, they would see if Ms Sanchez could take the interview. A moment later the women he was supposed to interview with motioned for him to come into the office. As he entered, a large Latino woman rushed in behind him, introduced herself as Ms Sanchez, and basically took over the interview (much to Ms William's obvious irritation). When Ms Williams tried to ask him about prior experience (of which he had none in this area) Ms Sanchez cut her off and redirected the questions. My brother said she was so warm and loving to him, that he thought that was her normal personality. He didn't find out until later that her kindness seemed to be reserved for Hispanics only. Anyway the long and short of it was that Ms Williams tried to deny him the position based on his youth and lack of qualifications, and Ms Sanchez overruled her. He got the job. His salary doubled and he loves it there. The people love him, and treat him like family. Even though he had no idea what he was doing, the ppl went out of their way for him and worked with him until he got the job down pat.
The thing is my brother is very young. I don't think he realizes that he got that job unfairly. Many far more qualified ppl were turned down because this Latino woman was determined to only hire her own kind! . I wondered what would have happened if one of us had gone in there with him, or his gf had been with him! (she's black). I was happy for him, but I felt a bit bitter because I thought about all the bp they probably turned down to insure a *Latino* person got that job! I also felt a bit angry because bp still don't seem to get it but everyone does. You can move mountains with a focused group, instead of spinning your wheels trying for a lifetime trying to do it yourself. My late, military father used to put it like this: Don't ever put your buddy's gas mask on-before your own! Spanish ppl seem very focused on bettering life for Spanish ppl. Same with Asian, Indian, etc. But Who focuses on bettering the lives of bp? Because it's certainly not us!- We always seem too busy trying to undertake someone else's cause!
Now that may sound racist, but I honestly don't mean it to. What I mean is that our *cause* has become so diluted, we don't even recognize it anymore. We have taken up so many banners that the message has become lost. My brother's experience is quite common. I remember dropping him off at a new HS, and watching Spanish kids come out of the woodwork to greet him and offer him help. I'm talking about when he was a complete stranger to them! They are quite cohesive as a people. They really seem to go out of their way for each other. My brother never worried about forgetting his lunch money in school or which clubs to join or anything else. He knew the Spanish kids would take him under their wing, and they always did. Maybe I'm jealous because I don't see this type of community, and mutual benefit in the black community. It fact it seems like many of us go out of our way to stand on each other's backs to get where we want to go in life. In fact we'll often go out of our way to buy from other ppl, to the exclusion of black ppl! We seem to have an inherent distrust of ourselves and I think others sense it and exploit it. For instance, why are all the black hair stores are owned by Koreans? How come ppl can come over here from another country and set up businesses in black communities? ( and do extremely well) Yet we could almost NEVER go into their communities and start a business with any viable hope of success! Why are so many bp are struggling to make ends meet, in a land overflowing with opportunity? I know someone whose husband is a cab driver. She says the man he works for came over here less than 5 years ago (from Pakistan) without a penny to his name. But he stayed with his family and they ALL worked, and saved a year and gave him the seed capital to start his cab service. Now a few short years later he makes upwards of 300.000 per year. He employs bm to drive his cabs and pump gas ( he now owns a gas station+ and several cabs) and employs Pakistan ppl to keep books, work the office, and do the day to day operations. My point is: how come bp don't work together to do things like this, so they can own the cabs instead of pumping the gas? How come we are the only race trying to do it all alone, or in conjunction with ppl who do not have our best interests in their sights? When you go into these places in the inner city, you will see that although they service the bc, they never HIRE from the bc. They always pick their own. They always put their own agenda first. Somehow we as a ppl have never learned to do this. I am not saying we should not care about others, I am saying we should take care of our own problems first. If your neighbors children are hungry, and your are as well-who gets to eat first? Any fool knows you feed your own children first, and then try to help the other children! But you must take care of your own home first- and take care of your own ppl first-everyone seems to inherently know this-except us.....
Botton line the reason I think we MUST focus on our own agenda to the exclusion of everyone else's is because no one else will! Everyone feels no shame in doing the best they can for their own community and not sharing that spotlight with anyone else. Everyone that is, except us. We are still trying to include everyone else, and diluting our message in the long term. We seem to embrace some false sense of guilt for even thinking of ourselves at all! While many others never give us a second thought! We need to stop playing the fools, and realize that we are just as important as anyone else, and that we must help ourselves before we can help anyone else....

Help!-my family hates my fiance because he's white.....

Two Happy sistas celebrate with their new husbands..............

The following is from a young lady addressing a panel in regards to her IR. I thought it was perfect for our forum so I posted it here. As you can tell, she really loves her family and feels deeply conflicted about the way they are acting toward her fiance. She had no idea they even harbored such hostility toward WP, and has no idea how to deal with it. If you were in her shoes what would you do? There are alot of ppl out there wondering this same exact thing.....

Here is her letter.

How do I convince my grandparents and aunt that marrying a white man will be okay when I am a black woman?
I am currently dating a white man who is a year older than me. My grandparents and aunt (who I consider my real parents) seem to treat him as if he is a little slow, when he is not or as if they do not feel comfortable around him. For instance, whenever he comes over to my house, especially around the summer at family reunions, everyone stares and laughs and does not introduce themselves. I have to make the introduction and when I do, they just stare through him. One of my family members at the family reunion laughed in front of him and made reference that he was white... I felt so bad. I know he feels uncomfortable about this, but he always tells me that he loves me. I never thought that my grandparents and aunt ever had a problem with white people. I grew up in an all-white neighborhood, attended a school with a population of 95% of the kids there being all white; with a few blacks, Indians, and hispanics. All I have known are white people...in fact, my stepmother is a white woman. I do not live with my parents because my father told me that he no longer wanted me. So, the issue, obviously since I am living with my grandparents and my aunt is with them... the problem is convincing them all that things will be okay. My grandparents and aunt never seemed to have a problem with me having white friends over or hanging out at the mall with them, so I never pressumed that all of this would go down! They have always treated all of my white friends as if they were a part of my family (at least that is what it seemed). I DO have some white people in my family as well. My grandparents and aunt have always told me to marry a man who treats me with respect, but when I brought home a white man, it was like to my aunt that I disowned my race. She said that 'I was only dating a white man, because I felt insecure about myself and that there are black men that know how to treat a black woman right.' I told my aunt," Then why aren't YOU married at all or married to a black man?! and she said nothing!" She always talks about how when she was my age how she dated a black man, but things never worked out! However, I do have a lot of black friends and hang around all of my family members who are mostly black.... I just never found the right black man for me. Some of my cousins said that they were not too surprised with me because I always acted too proper and that I was always so book-smart! When I dated a black man before he was just too loud, over controlling, and treated me like I was his DOG.... So, I was like, "Hell, no, honey, this is not working out... so, we split." I am a very quiet, conservative person. My black friends at school seem to feel the same way about things, such as it is okay to be friends with white people, but talking about marriage is another thing. I am just about to graduate college this year and my boyfriend has already graduated last year. What are some suggestions in dealing with my situation and convincing my family that he is a good man and that they should learn to accept him for who he is (and not because they only see his color)? I was really shocked because my folks are Christian and have always raised me to have an opened mind about things, so I thought perhaps now they are not so Christian as what I thought. It breaks my heart, but if things do not work out I do not want to tell him it was because my family does not accept white people, when in fact like I said before, I DO have white people in my family. It is really odd the way things work out in my family........

So what would you tell this young lady who obviously loves her family, and does not want to alienate them, but wants to marry this particular man. I would tell her to go with her heart. She may need to reduce the contact she has with her family until they get the message that this type of divisive, belittling behavior will not be tolerated. If they really love her (which I'm sure they do) they will try to tone their racism down, and make an effort to be more 'open'. If you are struggling with a similar situation, just remember that time has a way of healing all wounds, and that IR marriages with black women/white men have a very high success rate. Second only to Asian women/white men and nearly opposite of black men/white women marriages, which have a very LOW success rate. Think about it, there is absolutely no societal, or superficial benefits in these two ppl being together. Therefore love is the great and often only motivator in these couplings. If your family is giving you a hard time, ask them what is more important what the BC thinks or your happiness? Hopefully they will come back with the right answer, but even if they don't move on, and know that YOU are the only one who can live your life, and it's imperative that you live it for YOU.............

Outrage in Ohio-----Could this happen to you?????

Hope Steffey on the floor of the PD being strip searched.

I don't know if you all have noticed. But ever since 9/11 we have moved to the point of the state having more and more control of our lives, especially in the area of the police. I know that as AA's many of us have an innate distrust of the police anyway. But I never felt that way. As you all know, I was raised all over the US, and as a result, it enabled me to see things from many perspectives. I know this is not a political blog, however, socialism is an integral part of our lives, and as such sometimes these things must be discussed.

The reason I feel the following story is relevant (Although it involves a ww) is twofold.

1. I deplore seeing ppl having their rights violated, regardless of their ethnicity. IOWs, I don't want to see ANY woman sexually dehumanized and treated in such a horrific manner, as this video depicts.

And 2. If they can get away with doing this to an attractive, married, middle class, white woman, what the hell do you think they could get away with doing to the average WOC???

The following scenario involves a youngish ww who apparently got into an altercation with a family member. The family member apparently struck her, and she was crying. this resulted in her cousin calling the police. Once the officer reported to the house, she was asked for her Licence. At this point she mistakenly gives the officer her deceased sister's Licence, (by mistake). When she tries to take it back and explain it's the license of her deceased sister (which she keeps as a memento) he becomes enraged, and apparently thinks she's trying to pull some sort of scam. He was heard telling her that he did not give a damn about her dead sister, and refusing to give it back. Anyway, things progress from bad to worse with the officer deciding to take her in, and book her, (apparently for providing false information, and disorderly conduct.) She was put in the back of a police cruiser, and taken to the booking station. Once there she was asked a series of questions, such as do you have any sharp objects, do you have any drugs, have you ever contemplated suicide etc. When they got to the suicide question, she hesitated, and asked "now or ever?" At this point the interview stops and she is immediately seized by 7 officers. They threw her to a cell floor and began to bodily rip her clothing from her body. (She was handcuffed at the time) She can be heard screaming and crying as she is forcibly stripped of all her clothing in front of all the officers, (as well as anyone else in the vicinity. My description really does not do this horrific scene justice so I am including the video links: http://www.wkyc.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=82447

http://narcosphere.narconews.com/notebook/nora-callahan/2009/02/hope-america-and-hope-steffey

Be sure to see it before they remove it because she is now suing the entire police department. And I for one hopes she gets millions! I think it's horrible how she was treated. Watching it was akin to watching a person being tortured. She's on the floor, butt naked, and crying piteously while these men and women are forcibly stripping her of every shred of her dignity. As a woman, it's extremely hard to watch, and I felt like crying with her. Hurry and see the video before it's removed. She described the ordeal to her husband as being raped without being penetrated. I think that's sums it up perfectly, because watching it reminds you of an unfinished rape. She also claims she was beaten off camera, thrown face down (which resulted in a cracked tooth, and bulging disk, and we left naked, shivering, and crying, without medical care on a cold cement floor for over 6 hours. Like I said I hope she gets every penny she is suing for. I realize the police have a hard job, and I am trying to be objective. But I saw the tapes, and I feel that even if she was guilty of disorderly conduct -as they claim- there is NO excuse for 7 ppl to jump on a 125lb woman, take her down so roughly her tooth is cracked, and a disk is bulged, and then strip off her clothing like she's a hardened criminal! Nevermind the fact that men are NOT SUPPOSED to ever be in the room when a female is being strip searched under ANY circumstances! I'm horrified by how this woman was treated!! Read the account and watch the video, then tell me what you think ......

Currently Steffie (the victim) is suing and I wish her all the luck with her lawsuit. I am not one of those ppl who hate the police. But what I hate with a passion is injustice, and as far as I'm concerned. That's exactly what this was....

Below is the news account of the incident.... By the way ladies, if you are ever arrested, regardless of how minor the charge is. If they ask you if you have ever contemplated suicide, regardless of whether you've ever thought about it, tell them NO!

CANTON -- Hope Steffey's night began with a call to police for help. It ended with her face down, completely naked and sobbing on a jail cell floor.
Steffey says Stark County sheriff's deputies used excessive force and assaulted her during a strip search 15 months ago, according to a federal lawsuit.
Stark County Sheriff Timothy Swanson denies the allegation.
Steffey's attorney says her clothes, including her underwear and bra, were stripped from her body by at least seven male and female sheriff's deputies and jail workers. She lay face down in handcuffs at the time.
"Hope begged and pleaded with her ... assailants to stop," the lawsuit says. "There was no forcible penetration but Hope felt as if she was being raped."
The sheriff denies this was a strip search.
The sheriff's policy requires officers conducting any strip search to be of the same sex.
Her attorney, David Malik, said Steffey, 41, was never asked to voluntarily remove her clothes. In an e-mail, Swanson said Steffey was asked to remove her clothes but refused. He said deputies took them off for her own safety.
Swanson declined to comment further, saying the details would come out in court.
Channel 3 News obtained exclusive video of Steffey's night in the Stark County jail cell. You can click the link at the bottom of the page to view it. A warning: it is difficult to watch.
Steffey declined to be interviewed for this story. But her husband, a high school educator, talked to Channel 3's Tom Meyer.
Greg Steffey said his wife is still traumatized. But the couple wants the story told to prevent it from happening to someone else.
"This could be your wife or anyone's wife," Greg Steffey said.
He said he still can't believe this happened to Hope, a 125-pound woman who, earlier that night, turned to police for help.
"You don't treat people like this," Greg Steffey said. "I don't think murderers are treated like this much less people charged with disorderly conduct."
Steffey's ordeal with the Stark County Sheriff's deputies began after her cousin called police for help.
In a 9-1-1 call, her cousin said Steffey had been assaulted by another cousin.
When a Stark County deputy arrived, he asked for Steffey's driver's license. She accidentally turned over her dead sister's license, which she said she keeps in her wallet as a memento, the lawsuit says.
The deputy refused to give the license back and told Steffey to "shut up about your dead sister," according to her attorney.
The sheriff denied that in a written response to the lawsuit.
Eventually, Steffey was arrested and taken to the Stark County Jail. She was later charged with disorderly conduct and resisting arrest.
After her clothes were removed, she was locked in a cell. To stay warm, she wrapped herself in toilet paper. She remained in the cell for six hours.
During that time, she was not allowed to use a phone or seek medical attention for injuries she suffered that night, including a cracked tooth, bulging disc and bruises, the lawsuit says.
The sheriff denies that.© 2009 WKYC-TV

Hollywood's refusal to show classy, elegant, or beautiful BW!

Classy Deshawn appears to be far to ladylike for H.O.A. and beauties like Leila are often hidden from reg. programming...

Below is an excerpt from Essence re: Deshawn Snow. From real Housewives of Atlanta.

I'm very disturbed by her firing because I really feel that it was image-related. She was poised, attractive, demure and lady-like, and I really feel that this is NOT the image they want of BW! Listen to Deshawn tell a reporter the rationale given to her in regards to her storyline. Doesn't that sound strangely like they were miffed that she refused to get dirty, ghetto, and loud? If I'm wrong or reading too much into it, someone tell me, but this is the impression I am strongly getting. It seems to me that they just could not fathom a classy, attractive non-combative bw. I think image assassination is the biggest culprit to bw having better roles and better lives in and out of Hollywood. Yet Hollywood is a deciding factor in how we are seen, treated, live and interact. It's NOT NOTHING! l know alot of ppl think it's not important but let them ever try to portray ww the way they do us, and watch all hell break loose! Image is EVERYTHING! It' so important that we must constantly fight negative images and be on guard against those who would work against our best interests. What many bp do not understand is that we are one of the few races in the world who is judged by their worst characters, and depictions. This is why when roles are slim for bw and the only bw used is loud, overbearing, argumentative, and severely overweight, it is extremely damaging to ALL bw. I cannot emphasize enough the need to fight Hollywood, and their constant misrepresentations, and take our image back!

Below is the interview with deshawn, and the reporter's comments.....

Deshawn Snow granted an exclusive interview with Essence yesterday after being booted from Bravo’s hit show the Housewives of Atlanta. According to Deshawn, The firing came as a surprise as they had just talked about a new season weeks beforehand. The producers excuse for removing her from the line up was her storyline was “too boring” and she wasn’t as outspoken as they would have liked during the filming of the show.

[One of the producers] called and said that I was “too human for a circus show” and that because the show did so well, they are about to pump up the drama and they didn’t think that I would fit in. He gave me an example, saying that during the reunion when I found out what a few of the other ladies said about me, they were expecting me to say more, but I’m not the type to go “television” and start acting crazy because somebody’s talking about me. I’m fine with the decision. It wasn’t my decision. They let me go and there are no hard feelings.
There are rumors that Tameka Foster will be replacing her in the line up. Sheree Whitfield may get the boot as well now that the truth has revealed that she’s one missed child support payment away from filling out a Wendy’s application.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I was supportive of the show until I found out that half of them bishes were broke. Flaunting around in Cadillacs and Rovers when they should have been driving Hyundais. DeShawn’s storyline was boring, but she was normal and gave some balance to the show. And putting a white woman with a bad weave on the show is not balance. I’m tired of seeing stereotypical loud, gold digging, ignant ass, neck rolling black women on television fronting about what they do and do not have. These are the images that are consistently pushed on television week to week and I’ve had enough!

Chris Brown and Rihanna, why is SHE being thrown under the bus?...

Chris Brown and Rihanna in happier days.....

I've been following the Chris Brown -Rihanna case, and I must admit to being shocked once again. Just when I thought I could not be shocked anymore by the things that black ppl do. If you ladies go to you tube, you'll see exactly what I am talking about.

It's really sickening, and unbelievable! There is a so-called re-enactment video with a large bg playing Rihanna (Even though Rihanna is very slim, and slightly built) She is in the car with Chris Brown when they begin to argue over a cell phone message from an alleged ex-girlfriend of his. She throws her large body against him and begins to slap him. He becomes angry and retaliates. As soon as he hits her, she then begins to crow triumphantly "I got you now Mother F-----! Her face is bruised and smiling as she tells him how she is going to get even. In the next scene, she is seen with a black eye looking scared and vulnerable (but we all know she is faking victimhood, because we have just seen her crowing triumphantly) The caption reads "Should have kept your hands to yourself!" -this is directed at her NOT HIM!!! WTH! As the movie goes off the words 'We support you Chris Brown' are clearly seen. I was flabbergasted as I watched it. First of all they have no idea what happened in the car, so they made up her attacking him first in order to justify him putting his hands on a woman. Second, they pledged absolutely no support to her, and even went on to imply that the whole thing was her fault! Third, by putting the words "should have kept your hands to yourself ' over her bruised picture, they were implicitly stating that she had gotten what she deserved!

I had to scan more movies because I was too horrified to believe my eyes. In the next one, Rihanna is being called a man, and jokes are being made about how he choked her so hard she passed out! BTW, according to TYT, She did tell the police that he choked her until she lost consciousness, and that they were indeed arguing over a text msg. from another female. She also goes on to say that he punched her, hit her numerous times, and finally choked her, telling her that he was going to kill her.

I watched about 7-8 videos before I was too horrified to look at even one more. In one, 'no air' is being played in revised form with him saying he was going to knock her in her big forehead, and her begging to breathe! It seemed every video made by black ppl was set as a joke! She was being called names and laughed at, at every turn, and NOBODY seemed to be condemning what he did except TYT reporters (Who are WHITE!) They were expressing the outrage that should have been coming from the BC. They kept saying they did not care what she had said to him, he had no business hitting a woman! How come the black community cannot see that? How come we are the ONLY community in which women and children are on their own, and the MEN are protected like little punks? Why haven't we learned that to destroy your women, is to destroy your lineage? According to you tube, both Snoop and Dr Dre have hit women. Snoop, allegedly beat a woman with a shoe, and I am unclear who Dr Dre hit, but one thing is clear. If those women had been white, both Snoop and Dre would be in jail right now, and in the bread lines upon their release. See wp PROTECT their women! They know how valuable the female counterpart of their race is. Yet bp throw theirs under the bus! Not only were blk ppl not livid about what happened to Rihanna, many of them expressed outrage that she would rat CB out!!! Can you say DAMAGED? I'm still shaking my head at the sheer lunacy of all this......

PS. take a love language test in white choc. preferred....